One in a Billion

Reason Two

Equally precious


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TITLE: Equally precious

AUTHOR: StarvingLunatic

DISCLAIMER: I don’t own these characters or the original premise behind this saga.

SUMMARY: AU. Sequel to The Gods Must Be Laughing. Shego and Kim are now trying to be a regular couple and do the things that they see their friends doing, like get married and have kids.

TYPE: Kim/Shego, Romance, Slash

RATING: US: R / DE: 16

Words: 4967

When someone does something special and makes you feel like you’re the highlight of the person’s life, doesn’t it make it you want to do the same for that person?

“Girl, that ring is banging,” Monique declared and Yori could only nod in agreement when they caught sight of Kim’s engagement ring. It was all that and more, they were certain of that, which might explain why they got even more excited for their friend than they already were when Kim showed them the ring for the first time. They both hugged the redhead almost as hard as they could when she flashed them the band.

Kim and Shego had spent most of last night looking for the ring after it got away from them thanks to the overdone hug Kim dished out when Shego presented her with the band. It had rolled under the sofa and behind one of the thick, short legs of the couch. They did not come across it until Shego lifted the sofa up completely and Kim crawled under it. And there was the wayward ring, lying as if everything was all right.

“I like it too and that’s why I have to pick out one that’s equal to this for Shego,” Kim informed her friends.

“Did she request that?” Yori asked curiously. She inquired because she knew that when Ron proposed to her, she did not have to run out and get him a ring. She considered that it might be different for the redhead since she was involved in a same-sex relationship, but she was not sure.

“Of course she didn’t request that. Kim just feels like she has to match her ring to show Shego that she feels the same way. Come on, Yori, you know Kim,” Monique pointed out and the ninja nodded again.

“So, what do you have in mind?” Yori asked.

“No clue and that would be why you two are here and we’re going to the mall. We’re going to find something totally spanking!” Kim declared with an enthusiastic grin that they had come to expect of her. She had called her friends out to loan her their fine eyes and help in finding Shego a lovely ring to show off like she was getting the chance to do.

“Do you have the money for something totally spanking?” Monique inquired with a skeptical expression on her face.

Kim suddenly deflated for a moment and then she wrapped her arm around Monique’s shoulders. “Can you not bring me down with relevant questions?” the redhead requested in a semi-serious tone.

“Are we to loan you money again?” Yori asked curiously. She had no problem loaning Kim money. Being a trust fund baby and having a job at a school gave her more money than she needed.

“Well…if necessary, please?” Kim replied with a slightly pathetic look on her face to assist in them giving in.

“Girl, you need to learn the value of money,” Monique chastised her best friend. Kim pouted because of that answer. Monique shook her head. “No, no, no. Don’t even try that. You need to learn the value of money and it’s a good time to start,” the chocolate-eyed female declared.

Kim went into full fledge puppy-dog pout mode. Her friends groaned and they silently promised themselves that it was not going to work for once. They would be like steel because Kim did need to learn the value of money. She needed to stop giving every penny that she had away to anyone that she saw with a cup or a sign.

Kim continued on with her ultimate weapon against her friends. They turned away to not see the expression, but they could just feel its evil radiating from the redhead and changing their opinions. They turned back to her and sighed.

“Fine, we’ll loan you the money if you need it,” Monique conceded. At least Kim always paid the money back within a month’s time, but she still needed to understand that she needed to keep her own money.

“Spanking!” Kim cheered.

“We should request that she teach us that tactic,” Yori commented, speaking to Monique about the puppy-dog pout.

“It isn’t going to help us against her,” the chocolate-eyed woman pointed out.

Yori nodded one more time to that one. Knowing the scheme would not save them from it and Kim could attest to that. Her mother used it against her on occasion, after all. They really had no need for it, anyway. She used it mostly on Shego now. They did not have the same peculiar relationship with their spouses as she had with her lover.

“Okay, let’s go out and get a banging ring to hang out with that thing on your finger,” Monique stated.

“Something that Shego could show off like you,” Yori added, getting into the spirit.

“Yes!” Kim grinned. She loved the friends that she had because they were just as hyped as she was in assisting her find a piece of jewelry from her beloved. They went to several malls looking for the perfect ring for Shego.

“Man, it feels good to be home,” Shego sighed as she entered the house and she just automatically braced herself for what she knew was coming.

“Welcome home!” Kim shouted as she dashed over to Shego and embraced the older woman.

It was the same almost every day still. Shego had once thought that the energetic hugs were going to stop once Kim was totally out of the pet zone, but that was not the case. In fact, Kim still acted pretty much the same as she had when she was a pet; it was just a part of who she was when she was around the pale woman now. She did not whine as loudly, but she still did it quite often. She even still threw tantrums on some occasions. Shego only pretended to mind, as usual.

“Hey, Princess,” Shego greeted the redhead. She leaned down and gave Kim a small kiss on the corner of her mouth.

“Hey, how was your day?” the younger female inquired while continuing to hang on Shego, even though the green-skinned officer was walking further into the house. Shego just picked Kim up to make the trek easier, holding the smaller female on her hip like one would do with a child.

“Same old, same old. Are you going to let me go or are you coming with me upstairs while I get out of these clothes?” the older woman inquired.

“Do you even have to ask? I mean, one of those involves me getting to see you undress,” Kim pointed out.

The raven-haired officer laughed; she should have seen that coming. Fine, so she was carrying Kim upstairs now. She had no problem with that plan or doing it. She went upstairs and sort of dropped Kim on their queen-sized bed. The olive-eyed scientist made herself comfortable while Shego changed into some house clothes. When Shego was done, she turned her attention to Kim.

“So, you want to watch some TV?” Shego asked.

“Actually, I want to do something better than watch TV,” Kim answered.

Many things went through Shego’s mind as that response came. With Kim, something “better than watch TV” could be almost anything. Topping that list would be carnal pleasure and that was what Shego was going to tag and shoot down.

“Sorry, Princess, but I’m not taking off the clothes I just put on,” the raven-haired female informed her fiancée with a taunting smile.

“No, no, no. Not that…although now that you put it out there, I’m going to keep it in mind for later,” Kim remarked.

“Then what do you want from my life now?”

Kim only smiled in response. She rolled off of the bed and stood before Shego. The cantankerous woman looked rather irked for no reason other than the fact that she seemed to like acting annoyed, especially when it came to the decided love of her life. Kim took Shego’s hand and held it in her own, which made the older female rather curious as to what was going on.

“I thought about all the ways I could do this and still give it some meaning, even though we both know the outcome. Still, I wanted to do this. Shego, I love you with everything I have in me and I know I always will. I can’t tell you how long I’ve felt this way, but I know it’ll always last. I don’t think there are words to describe how happy you make me feel, especially when you proposed and I would love nothing more than to return that feeling. So, Shego…” Kim paused for a moment to get down on one knee. “Would you do me the honor of becoming my wife?”

Shego was confused for a moment. Was it not redundant for her already fiancée whom she just proposed to twice in as many days to propose to her now? It did not make any sense to her, but that suddenly did not matter when she felt a ring slide onto her left hand. She looked down and saw Kim slipping the band on. Shego inexplicably felt a rush of emotion, even if the proposal was redundant.

“You’re trying to make me cry again, aren’t you?” Shego accused her elfish girlfriend in a teary tone. The “again” referred to when she cried back when she first declared her love for Kim because she was feeling that kind of flood of emotions. She felt so unlike herself thanks to Kim, but it did not bother her because it was Kim.

“I just want you to know what it feels like to have someone care so much and want to be with you all the time that the person proposes,” the redhead replied.

Shego sniffled and the smaller female stood up. They hugged each other. Kim did not bother to point out that she had not gotten an answer to her question. Shego was too caught up in the moment and she was just going to let Shego enjoy it. After all, she got to enjoy it twice.

“Sure, Pumpkin, I’ll be your wife,” Shego answered after a full minute.

“Good to know,” Kim commented. “Now, how about kissing me before I explode?” she requested in a whine.

Shego laughed and wasted no time in fulfilling that request, hoping to convey the feeling that she was experiencing into the kiss. She felt as if she had won a billion dollar lottery, but even better. It really should not feel so good to be proposed to by someone she already proposed to, twice in fact! She was glad that it did feel so good, though. The feeling let her know that she had done the right thing. She was supposed to be with Kim for all eternity.

(New day)

“Um…Shego,” Betty said.

“Huh?” Shego said in a daze. She was sitting at her desk, minding her own business in her opinion. Zoning off in her boss’s opinion, but then again, no one asked for Betty’s opinion.

“Maybe you should go home,” the one-eyed woman suggested.

“Why do you say that?” Shego inquired. She was more daydreaming than listening to the chief. She was staring her at her left hand while resting her head in her right one. There was a glazed over look in her emerald eyes, which showed that she was not in the office mentally.

“Well, because I’ve been trying to give you this assignment for the past minute and you only just realized I’m even standing here,” Betty explained.

“Uh-huh,” Shego agreed in a manner that showed she did not even have a clue as to what her boss was going on about.

Betty sighed and shook her head. She handed the assignment off to the nearest officer and then turned her attention back to Shego, who was still lost in her own little fantasy world. Betty wondered what was so fascinating about Shego’s left hand that had her on another planet pretty much and then she noticed it. She laughed a little and smiled, nowhere near the reaction that she had last time that she saw a ring on Shego’s left hand.

“That ring looks a little expensive. How’d your brat buy it, borrow money from you?” the one-eyed woman teased.

“Huh?” Shego said, still zoned out for the most part.

“Damn it, Shego. Tell me about the ring or go home,” Betty ordered. She was secretly curious about the band that her friend was sporting. It did look rather expensive with a line of emeralds around a band of white gold.

“The ring? Oh, it’s nothing!” Shego insisted as she finally reentered the real world. She put her left hand down, hiding it underneath her desk.

“No, it’s too late to try to act like yourself now. Tell me about the damn ring,” the older female commanded.

Shego sighed. “All right, fine,” she conceded as if it pained her to do so. She picked her hand back up to admire the ring again and allow Betty get a good look, hoping that the one-eyed woman knew that it topped her engagement ring by far.

In reality, Shego would have loved nothing more than to tell any and everyone willing to listen about her engagement ring. It was just that it was not something someone like her should do, so she was trying her best to contain the joy. But, she guessed that she could tell Betty and that would hopefully sate her desire to let the world know that she had the greatest girl on the planet who had brought her an extremely beautiful engagement ring. Shego beamed before she began speaking and Betty considered that she might actually want to run, very fast. Shego seeming giddy like a school girl had to be a sign of the oncoming apocalypse.

“Kimmie proposed to me and this is the engagement ring she brought,” Shego practically squealed. Her expression of delight was bordering on her looking scatterbrained, but she could give less than a damn about that.

Betty was seriously reminding herself where the emergency exits were. It was just extremely weird to see Shego acting…well…like a girl in love. It was too new and too strange, but Betty knew that she had to deal with it. After all, Shego had dealt with it when she had gotten engaged to Dahntay.

Shego might contend that she put up with more when Betty got engaged to Dahntay. It was like an alien had taken over her best friend. It was almost impossible to antagonize Betty during that time and it was a little annoying. She was always smiling back then too and seeming to make it a point to be nice to even the stupidest person working for her. Shego had not liked Betty acting so unlike herself, but now she did not notice that she was doing the same thing.

“The brat proposed to you? Didn’t you propose to her already…twice?” Betty inquired in a puzzled tone. Why was it those two never made any sense?

“Yeah, but she proposed to me too,” Shego answered with a lighthearted smile. “It was so sweet.”

“Why would she propose to you after you proposed to her?” Betty asked.

“She wanted me to know how it felt.”

The one-eyed woman was not following. How the hell would Shego know how it felt when the outcome was already determined? Why was she even trying to understand, she asked herself. After all, her best friend was now engaged to a girl that started out as her pet. There was no way that those two would ever make sense no matter how long they lived.

“Did it work?” Betty asked just to egg Shego on.

“Yeah,” the pale woman answered in a dreamy tone.

The boss was surprised by that answer for some reason, even though Shego’s demeanor made it an obvious answer. She just did not understand how being proposed to by her fiancée could do anything. They were already engaged. Another proposal should have been meaningless, but obviously not considering how Shego was acting.

“So, when and where is the wedding?” Betty asked curiously.

“I don’t know,” Shego answered. Betty was starting to harsh her mellow with relevant questions. She just wanted to bask in the glow of her stunning engagement ring for the moment.

“Don’t you think you and the brat need to start figuring that out? You don’t want your mother to start sticking her nose in it, do you?” the older woman pointed out.

And the mellow was totally shattered right there. Betty might as well have hit her with a tactical nuclear device, Shego figured. The pale woman’s expression completely dropped. Her left hand fell to her side. Her mother getting in on planning her wedding? There was not a snowball’s chance in Hell that she was going to allow that to happen!

“I need to go home,” Shego declared as she stood up and hurried away from her desk.

The one-eyed woman saw that coming. She would have done the same thing if she was in Shego’s place. Her mother had actually tried to come and run shop over her wedding to Dahntay, which was not too long ago. It had been an eventful few days when her mother had showed up, but in the end, she got the old woman to sit back, shut up, and enjoy the stupid ceremony. Granted she had to sit her mother between Isabel and Shego to get that to happen, but it did happen.

She had had a big, traditional wedding, in a church and everything, even though she was far from any kind of Christian. She highly doubted that Shego would go for that, even if she had been in a traditional relationship. There were several reasons why she knew that Shego would never have a traditional relationship and the number one reason was the fact that Isabel had been married in a church. The day that Shego voluntarily or happily did something like her mother would be the day the sun was blown out like a candle.

Shego ran to her car and nearly killed about a dozen people on the way home. She was not even sure if Kim was at the house and she would probably be extremely pissed if Kim was not, especially since she ran a bunch of lights to get there quickly. She tapped the trash cans with her bumper as she pulled up to the house. She dashed into the house, kicking her shoes off at the door.

The first place that she went to check was the living room. Kim was lying on the sofa, as expected. The redhead was knocked out, which was also expected. She was wearing house clothes, which showed that Kim was sporting some bandages; she had recently gotten in from a mission.

“Princess! Wake up!” Shego commanded as she fell to Kim’s side and began shaking the petite hero.

“Wha?! I didn’t eat the cake!” the olive-eyed adventurer insisted as she woke up with a shock.

“What cake?” Shego asked curiously because she had a slice of cheesecake waiting for her in the fridge. If her imp had the nerve to eat that cake, she was going to wail on the brat like never before.

“Huh? Who said anything about cake?” the redhead inquired while yawning and gaining some control over herself as she realized that she was awake.

“You said something about cake.”

“Oh.” Kim laughed nervously. “I guess I was just having a dream about cake,” she said with a smile.

“I’m sure,” the pale woman commented sarcastically.

“Um…yeah, so what’s with the rude wake up call?” Kim asked to change the subject. She also desired a reason for why she was being taken from such a heavenly rest in such a vicious manner. Usually, she got to woken by having her scalp caressed, which made waking up well worth it.

“We need to talk about the wedding.”

“Right now?” the slender scientist inquired in a puzzled tone.

“Yes, right now,” Shego stated soundly.

“Okay, well, what do you want to talk about?” the younger woman asked while yawning again. She scratched the top of her head and then rubbed her eyes to make sure that she was totally up.

“When do you want to get married? What kind of wedding do you want? Where do you want it?” Shego inquired in an almost frantic tone. They needed to get that all sorted out posthaste, before Isabel made another appearance as far as she was concerned.

“I don’t know. I haven’t thought about it,” Kim admitted. She was still spinning in a cloud of bliss from the proposal. She figured once that great feeling wore off, she would start thinking about the actual event or she might overwhelm herself.

“Well, start thinking about it,” Shego ordered.

“What, right now?” Kim asked in a puzzled tone.

“Yes, right now!”

“I don’t really feel like it,” the younger woman replied with a shrug, which only set her fiancée off more.

“Don’t be so nonchalant about these things!” Shego hollered and she grabbed Kim by her shirt. “Do you know what’ll happen if we don’t get this worked out?” she asked in a panic. She so did not want to see her mother again.

“No, I don’t. Is the Earth going to fly out of its orbit if I don’t work this out?” Kim asked curiously and it could be seen in her eyes that she was about to start imagine that one, so Shego decided to cut that out before it even began.

“Don’t even think about it,” the raven-haired officer commanded and she started shaking her little monster.

“But, wouldn’t it—” Kim started to say because she was about to go into if the Earth flew out of orbit.

“No, it wouldn’t. Now, start thinking about how you want this wedding to go before I make you sleep in the hall,” the pale woman threatened and she thumped the redhead in the nose.

“Ah! Domestic violence!” Kim pretended to cry and she covered her nose with her hands.

“Come on, Kimmie, we need to think about this. If we don’t, soon my mother is going to burst through the door with a billion suggests that I don’t want to hear and she’s not going to listen to me. I want this to be something that we created, not something that was born in that woman’s sick, diseased mind,” Shego explained.

Shego really did want their union to be something that was theirs and theirs alone. She would take help if they needed it, but she wanted the foundation of the wedding to be from their minds. She especially did not want her mother’s input for the most part. She just wanted her mother to show up when it was supposed to happen and shut up through the whole matter. It was a lot to ask for, she knew, but a woman could hope.

“Oh, okay, well if you put it that way…” Kim trailed off as she changed her sitting position to a thinking position, folding her legs underneath her and propping her arm up on her knee to lean her head in her hand. “What do you think of getting married soon?” she asked.

“How soon?” Shego asked suspiciously.

“I don’t know, soon. Like next week!” Kim grinned.

“Too soon, Pumpkin. We don’t have anything prepared for next week, unless you want to elope, which I wouldn’t mind,” Shego admitted with a small shrug and then she leaned back against the sofa.

“Well, it wouldn’t be so bad, but our mothers would kill us once they found out. So, I guess we really should plan for our funerals if we do that,” Kim remarked.

“Good point,” Shego concurred.

“Well, where would you like to get married? I mean, you know I don’t really mind. This is actually enough for me. You didn’t even have to propose. I would have been more than content to just stay here with you like this,” the redhead explained with an elfish smile.

“What do you think about getting married on a beach?” the pale woman inquired. She figured that they were going to have to research a few places with beaches that would legally marry them. She thought that it would be a nice setting, though.

“So you can sunbathe and I can jet ski right after?” Kim asked with a hopeful expression.

“No, we’re not going to do that right after the wedding. People are going to want to eat or something before we get to anything like that,” Shego replied, quite seriously. Once everything was said and done, she would not mind getting some sunbathing in.

“Yeah, I guess people are going to want to eat and probably say a few words and everything. So, you want to get married on a beach? I wouldn’t mind that. Are we both going to wear white dresses?”

Shego made a face. It was not so much that she was against the idea of wearing a dress to the wedding, but wearing white. She never wore white, even when she was a child. Her mother used to try to dress her in white and she would tear the clothes when Isabel was not looking. She would then offer up a very innocent smile along with an “oops, guess I can’t go outside in this.”

“What’s wrong, Shego?” Kim asked curiously when she noticed the older woman’s expression.

“I don’t want to wear a white dress,” Shego answered.

“Oh, well, you don’t have to. I don’t think it’s a rule or anything like that. So, what color dress would you wear? Black and green or just one of those colors?”

“I don’t know. I don’t think I should wear black to our wedding. I mean, it’s a wedding, our wedding.”

“Yeah, but you shouldn’t do something you don’t like,” the redhead replied with a shrug. “I mean, it probably would look a little weird for me to be dressed in white and you’d be dressed in black, but there’s nothing wrong with that.”

“Maybe I could wear a tux,” Shego mused aloud. It would give her the excuse to wear black and green.

“Do you really want to wear a tux?” the hero inquired, just to be sure.

“It would drive my mom nuts. Hell, my dad too. Do you mind if I wear a tux?” the pale woman asked curiously.

“Hey, if that’s how you’re comfortable.” Kim shrugged. They were getting married. Shego could show up stark naked and she would not care as long as they went through with the whole ceremony. Although she doubted that they would make it through the ceremony if her beloved showed up nude.

“If I wear a tux, I could get a green vest to go with it. At least I’ll be wearing my favorite colors and everything.”

“Okay, so we’ve got that down. We’re going to be on a beach. I’ll be in a white dress and you’ll be in a tux. Where’s this beach going to be located?” Kim asked.

“I don’t know. I guess we’d have to go somewhere where this sort of thing is legal and everything,” Shego pointed out.

“Oh, yeah,” Kim said.

The slender adventurer had forgotten that there were many places that would not marry them. In her mind, they were finally a regular couple and she thought that they could do whatever a regular couple could do. But, nope, they were not quite there yet and they had done all that they could about their relationship. So, they were probably as “regular” as they were going to get.

“How about we go to a tropical location?” the green-skinned woman suggested.

“Okay, at least the beach’ll be nice,” Kim agreed with a nod.


“Hey, I have a really important question,” the younger woman just realized.

Shego was suspicious of that. Whenever Kim just suddenly made proclamations, it tended to lead to places that had nothing to do with what they were discussing. Those places usually involved kinky things or food; sometimes it was those things combined.

“What about the honeymoon?” the olive-eyed scientist inquired as if that was the most important thing about the whole wedding.

“I know what I want to do for that,” Shego admitted. She had thought long and hard on that one even before she proposed.

“Yeah?” Kim appeared incredulous to that news and it was because Shego did not know what she wanted to do about their wedding, but already knew what she desired to do for their honeymoon. “Oh, what are we going to do on our honeymoon? What’s it going to involve? I know, strawberries, whipped cream, chocolate and maple syrup…Could you make pancakes right now?” the redhead requested. She had made herself hungry that quickly.

Shego sighed. “I should’ve seen that coming,” she remarked. She supposed that it could have been worse with the way Kim’s mind worked.

“Is that a ‘yes’?”

“Sure, I’ll make some pancakes, but we have to keep talking about this one. We need to get this mapped out before my busybody mother sticks her pointed witch nose in our business,” Shego replied.

Kim nodded to show that she was all for that idea, but Shego suspected that the redhead was mostly on board for the pancakes. They retreated to the kitchen where Shego started on the flapjacks and they continued on bouncing ideas around about the wedding. It would seem that Kim was not just along for the hotcakes, which Shego was thankful for.

Next time: anybody up for a madcap wedding?

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