You know, if you’re going to have a pet, it should be able to attack unwanted guests. Or it should at least be able to warn you that someone you don’t want to see is coming by.
Kim recently learned a new fact of life; a person that was uniquely maladjusted was probably that way because of the person’s mother. Her master had told her so, although her mistress had used much simpler and harsher language when explaining it. Well, now Shego’s mother was in the house and she wondered if her mistress fell into such a category. She guessed that she would find out by being a bad pet and hanging around for the plausible carnage that might take place.
The redhead first excused herself to the kitchen to make tea for her mistress and guest, just to allow the mother the chance to have the idea of privacy. She was not too far away to hear anything that might go on unless they started whispering, which she knew Shego would not do. Shego did not think of Kim as a person, meaning what the girl thought did not matter and she would say just about anything around the teen.
Shego just gawked at her mother because she could not believe that a member of her family was in her home while the older woman merely sat down as if there was nothing wrong with her being in her daughter’s home. Her mother was a pale woman, which Shego was too, even with the sickly green hue that coated her. They shared quite a few features, emerald eyes, flowing ebony hair, and heart-shaped faces. Her mother was taller than she was.
Shego decided to turn the television off because it was only going to serve as background noise from then on until her mother left the apartment. She knew that her mother would want her full attention, not that the older woman expected it. Shego did the unexpected thing and gave her mother just what she desired; it was defiance in a unique manner. Shego had learned through out her years with her family that being a rebel meant doing the things they expected the least and making sure to be as cranky as possible about it.
“How long have you been in town?” Shego asked.
“A few days,” her mother answered in a dismissive tone.
“Staying at a hotel or with one of your idiots?” the younger woman inquired with a bit of an attitude.
“You shouldn’t say such things about your brothers. They sometimes show signs of intelligence, which we all know they get from me. I’m staying at hotel.”
Shego looked directly at her mother as she made her next inquiry. “I was on the news, wasn’t I?” she practically demanded to know. Her mother would not be here just because she was in town for whatever. Her mother was too irksome to not be at her home to check on her and make sure she was all right after she was blown out of that stupid building; as if she needed looking after or to be taken care of like a baby, the super-powered woman thought with a huff.
“I only saw for a moment. That is not why I am in town,” her mother assured her. She knew that Shego would not believe her, though.
“Then what?” the daughter asked quickly, thinking that she might catch her mother off guard. She should have known better, though.
“I’m giving a weekend seminar about women and martial arts. If you’d like, you can come down and participate in a demonstration,” her mother offered in a dry tone with a small smile on her face.
“Last time I was in a demonstration, you kicked me twenty feet and into a wall,” Shego reminded her mother in a bit of a huff.
“Well, you were only ten. I should hope that you’re better now.”
Shego did not reply to that and her mother sighed when she noted the younger woman seemed to take great offense to her words. Kim poked her head out to the living room from around the corner and noticed that her owner was in a strange position. Shego was slouched forward and staring at the floor. She looked defeated, ashamed, even disappointed; Kim had never seen such a sight and she did not know what to make of it.
“I’m only teasing, little firefly,” her mother said to Shego.
“Don’t call me that,” Shego grumbled. Why did parents have stupid nicknames for their children anyway? Did they not know that their offspring would hate the names almost always no matter what?
Her mother sighed. “What do you want to call you then?” she asked. Why was it so hard for them to speak to each other when they were so much alike, they both wondered; it was not only at the moment, but often through out time that they had such a problem. It was not that they did not want to get along, but they did not seem to know what to make of each other.
“Shego,” the daughter answered about what she desired to be referred to as.
“Why? It’s not the name on your birth certificate and how you hated it so much back then.”
“Firefly isn’t on my birth certificate and I hated it back then too, but you call me that,” Shego pointed out. She was not sure why she preferred the name Shego over others and she refused to consider why, but it was just what she wanted to be called. Hell, to her, all names beat her given name.
“All right, all right,” her mother easily conceded and she decided to change the subject because she had not come over to upset her daughter or to have an argument of any kind. She glanced toward the kitchen. “Isn’t that girl a little young for you?” she asked curiously. She had always thought that her daughter was into the opposite sex, but it appeared that she was wrong.
“It’s not like that,” Shego replied. She would have thought that her mother knew her well enough to know that she would never be in a relationship with a runt like her annoying pet.
“No? You appear to be in house clothes because you wouldn’t go outside in such an outfit. She looked like she was still in pajamas. How is it if it isn’t like that?” her mother inquired curiously.
“She’s my pet,” Shego answered effortlessly, as if it was nothing at all for her to have a teenage girl as a pet. Kim wondered how her owner’s mother would react to such news.
“Your pet?” her mother repeated in a bewildered tone.
“Yes, my pet.”
“Then why’d you call her Princess?”
“That’s what I named her.”
“You named a teenage girl?” her mother inquired. She was obviously not following how the “pet” thing was working and the look in her eyes conveyed that idea more than her question.
“She’s my pet,” Shego repeated again, figuring that it would explain itself if her mother thought on it for a moment or so. After all, her mother had to know what a pet was considering the fact that the boys had murdered dozens of pets when they were younger.
Kim jogged in with tea for all after hearing her mistress admit that she was a pet. Kim was not sure what to think about the mother and daughter because Shego was honest with the woman and they were talking fairly comfortably. Shego did not appear anxious in any way and her mother mirrored the passive expression, but they somehow did not seem to be getting along. Kim handed the pair their drinks and then flopped down at their feet.
“Pumpkin,” Shego said.
“Yes?” Kim asked with a smile.
“Go to bed.”
“It’s eight o’clock,” the teen pointed out.
“Go to bed,” she repeated the command.
“Ah, man. This is ferociously wrong,” Kim complained as she stood and went to her loft. “I’m going to sleep in your bed tonight!” she informed her master as that was one of the best punishments she could offer for making her go to bed at such an early hour.
“I’d like to see you try,” Shego dared the teen.
“And I’m going to use you as a pillow too!”
“And you’ll end up hiding in your stupid box all day too,” Shego retorted.
“And I’m going to hug you!”
Shego rolled her eyes. The whole reason for sending her pet away was so her mother did not see how she interacted with the girl. She did not want to give her mother the wrong impression and she did not mean that in the way most people might think; she just did not want her mother to think she enjoyed having the little pest around because that would be a mistake to think. She did not want her mother to think that she had changed in someway and could stand the company of anything or that she could care about anything.
Shego’s mother had come to understand the “pet” thing to the point where she could see that Kim was not Shego’s girlfriend. Beyond that, the concept was sort of lost on her because her daughter never showed any interest in having a pet. She guessed that it took a while for Shego to find a companion she was comfortable with.
“A pet girl. I can see why you never played with the dogs,” her mother commented with a slightly amused smile on her face.
“The dogs were dirty and that’s why I never played with them. No reason to get attached to something that was going to be dead or gone in a month anyway,” Shego remarked.
The younger woman knew that her mother would not think that she was odd for having a pet girl. Shego would not be surprised if her mother had done something similar when she was young. Her mother was such a peculiar person and Shego knew that she got all of her quirks from the woman. She guessed she should be thankful for that; she could have inherited her father's personality after all.
“So, how did you know where I lived?” Shego inquired in a bit of a defensive tone.
Her mother smiled a little, as if the question tickled her. “Come on, sweetie, you have to give your mother some credit.”
“I know you came here because I was on TV.”
“I promise you, I only saw it for a moment. I don’t even know what really happened. I’m here for a seminar and I thought because I was in town and it had almost been two years, I should see you. Would you rather I left? You can go back to just being with your pet,” her mother proposed.
“No,” Shego mumbled. Deep down in a pit that she refused to acknowledge even existed, she missed her mother a bit and she would like to spend some time with the woman before they both got on each other’s nerves.
“Do you want to talk about anything?”
“Not really.”
“You could just tell me about your pet if you’d like. I don’t need to know why you have one or anything, just about her.”
Shego nodded and told her mother about Kim and nothing more. The teenager stayed up and listened to them go on about her. Shego did not say anything really awful about her pet; she merely told the truth, even though some of the things seemed bizarre. Kim was willing to bet by the end of the conversation her mistress’ mother was convinced she was a complete idiot.
Kim knew that she had to come off as an imbecile and not because of the things that she did around the house. It was just the fact that she was someone’s pet. She was aware that most people believed no intelligent, self-respecting person would be another person’s pet. She did note that her keeper’s mother did not say anything in regards to her more than likely being brain-dead for being someone’s pet.
Then Shego announced that she wanted to take a shower, even though Kim recalled that she had taken one already. Her mother decided that she would take her leave then. Shego told her mother that she could let herself out. They did not hug or even bid each other farewell as they went their separate ways, Shego to her room and her mother to the door.
Kim could not help it; she was curious about what just happened. It was such a strange interaction; it was like the mother and daughter liked being around each other, but could not stand being together at the same time. She silently hopped down from her space and decided to follow Shego’s mother to find out why it seemed like she and Shego could only take each other in small doses, even though they appeared to get along rather well. They hardly made it down the street before Shego’s mother stopped.
“Come on out,” the older woman said.
“What?” Kim muttered. She could not possibly be talking to her, right?
“I know you’re there.”
“How’d you know?” Kim asked as she dropped in front of the raven-haired female.
“I taught her everything that she knows,” Shego’s mother answered.
“Yeah? That’s cool,” the redhead said for lack of a better thing to allow out of her mouth. She doubted that she would ever be able to come up with the right words to express what she was feeling by meeting the person that taught her mistress how to kick ass.
“Shego doesn’t know that you can do that, does she?”
“Probably not. There’s not really a need for me to do it around her,” Kim answered. She could have been sneaky around Shego, but she preferred the direct approach. It was so much more fun to go right at Shego to hug her, or sleep in her bed, or things like that.
“I take it you have questions about my daughter.”
“Tons,” the teenager answered honestly.
“Perhaps we can exchange information then. Come, my hotel isn’t too far from here.”
The redhead nodded and followed behind the other woman. The hotel actually was far by most people’s standards, by foot anyway, which was how they went. It was about three miles, but Kim hardly noticed. They did not really talk on the way. They came to the hotel, which looked elegant. They went up to rather nice hotel room and they both parked themselves in two chairs.
“First we should introduce ourselves, huh?” the mother suggested.
“Sounds fair. I’m Kim Possible,” the redhead replied.
“Kim Possible? I’ve heard of you. It’s quite a pleasure. I’m Isabel Gooding.”
“Wow, really? Could I come to your seminar then? I’ll be in a demonstration and everything. I don’t mind if you kick me into a wall,” Kim stated with a bit of enthusiasm. She was sitting in the presence of one of the most famous fighting women alive. Well, that explained why her mistress kicked serious butt. Wow, her mistress’ mother was practically a star. She wondered why Shego never said anything about it or why her owner never spoke to her mother.
“Well, if your master let’s you out, you can come along. I do think I made her cranky, though,” the older woman commented.
“I don’t see why. She seems like she likes you. I mean, she calls you ‘mommy.’ That’s got to add up to something,” the teen reasoned.
Isabel shook her head to disagree. “Shego loves and hates me. It’s a very complex issue that takes a lifetime to build on.” In retrospect, she could see the moments that she pushed Shego away and the moments that she held her close; she could see where their relationship got all muddled. She bet that Shego saw them too.
Kim nodded to show that she accepted the answer that was given to her. So, Shego was one of those people that her mother screwed up, the redhead thought. Well, maybe it was not so much screwed up because Kim did not think that Shego was so bad, but there were issues there.
“She doesn’t know that I’m very proud of her and she tries so very hard to prove herself to me,” Isabel informed the girl.
Oh, Kim’s mind rang out; Shego was one of those people seeking her mother’s approval. It did not seem like that, though. Maybe there was more to her than that; the redhead hoped that one day her mistress would tell her all about herself, so she would know just what Shego was about.
“Why not just tell her that you’re proud of her?” Kim asked.
“It’s not that simple. She’ll think I’m humoring her. She’ll just try harder. It’s happened before. There’s more to it than that too,” Isabel answered.
“Okay, care to tell me about that?”
“That would take a very long time. It would be like me having to tell you her life story until the time that she was about your age.”
Kim nodded to show that she understood; she did not have time for a life story. “Hey, what about telling me her real name,” the teen requested.
Isabel shook her head and smiled a little bit. “I’ll have to deny you that one. This is your master after all. I wouldn’t want you to look down on her.”
“Her name doesn’t fit her, huh? Well, why does she call herself Shego?”
“That’s her father’s doing. He isn’t completely sure what to do with her, even now. He tried to treat her like her brothers and nicknamed her accordingly. He treated her just like a little boy for a long time. You know, if I go into this, it could take a while. Are you sure you’re allowed to be out late?” Isabel seemed to tease the girl.
“If she doesn’t know, I guess it’s all right. You know, I think I might just respect her privacy. I do want to know about her, but I think I’d rather that she tell me than to get it from you,” Kim decided. It seemed wrong to her to go behind her owner’s back and learn all of her secrets from her mother. What did a pet need to know such things for anyway, her mind asked her and she agreed with that logic.
“That’s very noble. I can respect such a thing, but I can’t do the same. Tell me what you can about my daughter, please. I will not repeat it,” Isabel vowed.
Kim chewed on her lip for a second. “I’ll share a little bit,” she answered. Her mistress was going to be so angry with her if she found out that she was sharing information; only a naughty pet would do such a thing. Oh, wait, she was a naughty pet.
“All right. The first thing, why are you, Kim Possible, her pet?” the older female inquired in a confused tone.
“She doesn’t know who I am,” the redhead replied with a shrug.
“You’re not as famous as you should be. I would think that she would know, though.”
“I’m fine being where I am.”
The raven-haired woman nodded and then asked for simple information; well, it would have been simple information in regards to most people. She wanted to know that her daughter was all right, which Kim easily confirmed by pointing out how independent Shego was and giving a few examples to back up her answer. Isabel smiled softly; she knew that her strong-willed daughter could take care of herself. Shego always did want to be completely autonomous.
The older woman than wanted to know the second most important thing to a mother, the first thing was physical wellbeing. The second thing being emotional wellbeing and she wished to know if her daughter was happy. Kim made a face that showed the question was more complex than the few words made it sound.
“She always was a funny one when it came to happiness. Don’t worry about it,” Isabel told Kim.
“I can tell you this for sure, I try my best to make her happy,” the teen promised.
“I thank you for that. Are you going to stay with her?”
“For as long as she lets me. So, you don’t have to worry about her. I can make her smile, laugh, even relax.”
“She should marry you,” Isabel remarked.
The teenager laughed a bit. “Don’t put any ideas in my head. Why is Shego all right with having a pet girl? Do you know?”
“Kim, Shego is a woman with superpowers, green skin, and a very strange family. If something weird isn’t trying to hurt her, I don’t think it really bothers her. If you want to bother her with the bizarre, turn to crime because if you’re not breaking any laws, she’s not too bugged about it. Well, try not to say anything foolish to her too or do anything foolish. She gets annoyed to no end by foolishness.”
The redhead nodded. “That makes sense,” she muttered in agreement. “So, why did you really come see her?”
“For the reason I said and because I saw her on TV. I wanted to make sure she was all right. I’m glad to see that she is in more ways than one.”
“You’re about the only one that thinks she’s all right. Everybody else that knows about me and her thinks we're both bonkers.”
“You should always surround yourself with people you like, no matter what. Life is just too short to have to deal with bullshit from people,” Isabel commented and Kim could not help laughing because that sounded like something her owner would say.
Shego stood in her doorway and watched the front door open. She stared at her pet as she entered the apartment and silently closed the door. She ignited her hands and that got Kim’s attention.
“Shego,” Kim gasped; she should have known that her mistress would figure out that she was gone.
“Out pretty late, Pumpkin,” Shego commented.
“Um…” Kim could not think of an excuse to feed her master about why she was gone so late. There was no way to dress up that she was out talking to Shego’s mother to where it was not a lie, but it was a distortion of the truth.
“Speaking with my mother?” Shego growled.
“Yes,” Kim sighed. She was probably going to have to spend all of tomorrow underneath her box because of her chat.
“About me?” Shego asked, even though she knew the answer to that. It was not like her mother and her pet got together to discuss the possibility of there being life on other planets or to wax philosophically with each other.
“Yes.”
“Why shouldn’t I beat you within an inch of your life?” the master inquired with a deep frown on her face.
“Because I didn’t say much and I didn’t ask anything. I didn’t even get the chance to find out your real name,” the redhead admitted.
“No?”
“No, she didn’t tell me.”
Shego looked away as she returned her hands to normal. Kim stepped further into the apartment and stood by Shego. The super-powered woman turned back to the girl and rested her hand in Kim’s soft red mane.
“What did my mother ask?” Shego asked.
“Well, she wanted to know if you were all right in general. I told her the truth, yeah. You’re totally fine. You’re so good on your own that you’re keeping a pet and she was glad to know that,” Kim reported.
“And what else?”
“Then she asked if you were happy.”
“And what did you say?”
“I told her I try my best to make you happy,” the teenager answered.
Shego laughed a little bit. Kim was not sure what to think of the laugh; it could have been a skeptical sound or just a regular, amused laugh. She did not think too much on it. She knew how Shego felt about having her around and she knew what she was capable of when it came to her mistress. Kim looked at Shego to tell her one thing.
“She said she’s proud of you,” the redhead informed Shego.
Shego nodded a bit. “You know, Princess, sometimes life would be easiest if you were born without a family.”
“I don’t think life was made to be easy, unless you don’t really want to live and you don’t strike me as the type that doesn’t want to live.”
“Oh, look who’s talking. Could your life get any easier?” Shego inquired and Kim laughed. The pale woman gently scratched her pet’s head. “Look, Pumpkin, I’m in a giving mood and you already have the idea popped in your head, so, you want to sleep in the bed with me?”
“Do you even have to ask?” Kim replied.
“Not really, but you touch me, you die.”
“Aw!” Kim groaned in disappointment. It was not any fun sharing a bed with Shego and not being allowed to touch. But, she hardly followed the rules. She was glad that Shego was used to the bizarre because that meant that she would probably keep her around as a pet for a good long time.
Next time: It will rain fire and brimstone… Okay, I’m lying there, but there will be fire and smoke. Drakken comes back and a certain pet will be neglected because her mistress will be working crazy hours. So, the pet will have to entertain herself, what’s the worse that could happen?