Chapter 4

Colder Turkey


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TITLE: Colder Turkey

AUTHOR: StarvingLunatic

DISCLAIMER: Don’t own the characters, they’re Disney’s. Don’t own the song Addiction, it’s Kanye’s. Also, don’t own Marvin the Martian or Daffy Duck, they’re probably Warner Bros.

SUMMARY: Kim and Shego find themselves addicted and now they're looking to quit each other.

TYPE: Kim/Shego, Romance, Slash

RATING: US: R / DE: 16

NOTE: I feel I should warn people about the humor in this story, apparently, some people find it funny.

Words: 2608

A/N: I feel like such a jerk, I just realized I’ve been spelling Kanye West’s name wrong.

So, I guess that means I’m a drug…” Kanye West, Addiction


Kim was lying on the sofa in her house, staring at the television. She was merely looking at the set, not focusing on the program in any way. She had not even been the one that turned the television on. Her brothers had run in some minutes ago, turned on the television, and then ran out without leaving a clue as to what they were doing. Her olive eyes happened to be in the direction of the picture and she was not willing to pick up the remote to turn it off or to turn her head in some other way.

The redhead wanted to say that she was bored. She really just wanted to lie to herself and say that she was bored, but she knew the truth. She missed Shego and it was not a regular emotion to her. It was a substantial sense of lose that deepened with each day that went by. She thought that giving something up was supposed to be easier after a while, but it was not getting any easier being without the thief and she did not even mean that in a way that she missed doing their usual two actions; she missed Shego, point blank.

Kim was not sure what it meant for her to just miss Shego. Shego was a drug, after all. Of course, as a drug, she would be missed while Kim was attempting to get her out of her system. It did not feel like she was going to make it cold turkey, though. She was not sure what she was going to do when she saw Shego again, and she was sure that she would have to face her soon, but she hoped that it would not be counterproductive.

“Kimmie, what are you doing?” her mother inquired as she entered the living room and she sat down next to the disoriented hero.

“Nothing,” Kim replied.

“Are you all right?”

“Yeah. Why do you even ask?”

“You haven’t been yourself lately. School problems?” her mother asked with concern in voice and on her face.

“No,” the girl replied.

“A villain maybe?”


“I heard Wade talking about a series of robberies this morning over breakfast. How come you’re not going out?” her mother inquired. Wade had contacted Kim that morning to go about how some tech place was hit, but Kim was not even paying him any mind because she knew that he was talking about Shego.

“I know who it is,” Kim replied.

“So, you’re not going to go?” Doctor Possible asked in a confused tone.

“It’s no big. I figure that I’ll just wait for the end of everything and then go kick Drakken’s butt instead of chasing Shego around the globe,” Kim explained with a slight shrug.

“That’s not like you. Usually, you’d go to stop Shego before giving Drakken the chance to do anything,” her mother pointed out.

“This is less of a hassle.”

“I’m getting the feeling that there’s more to it than that,” the older redhead commented.

“You’re reading way too much into it, Mom. This is just less bothersome, less bruises too,” Kim remarked.

“Well, I do like that last part of it. But, this is so strange. You’re usually glad to go out and stop Shego,” her mother pointed out.

“I know,” the teenager sighed.

“Well, if you’re just going to stop the problem at the end, what are you going to do with your time until you find out what Drakken has planned?”

“I don’t know,” Kim groaned. She had been doing things, but they were not enough. Nothing was enough.

While Shego had been on her thieving spree, Kim had been doing everything possible, except for stopping the other martial artist anyway. She had been saving people from natural disasters; she even stopped some crazy plot by Duff Killigan, who planned to take over the whole country of Scotland and turn them all into golfers for whatever reason. She had also been helping around school and around her community. She was trying to just do things to keep Shego off of her mind, but it was not working. There was a hollow feeling inside of her, reminding her that she missed a certain raven-haired female.


Shego was pleased in a way that she did not have to see Kim as she ran around and did her thing. She was not sure what she was going to do when she did see Kim and she was well aware that the day was going to come soon. She was more than aware that her little princess was not going to allow Drakken to succeed with his nutty plot. She was not about to lose the bet, but she was not too sure if she was going to be able to control herself when she did see Kim again.

The super-powered woman hated what was happening, not just the bit of not seeing Kim, but the side-effects of not seeing the hero. It left her thinking, pondering, contemplating what it was that she had with Kim. The catastrophic sense of absence that accompanied not seeing the redhead seemed to suggest that their relationship was something other than what she believed it to be. She had figured that they were rivals when it came to fighting. There must have been mutual lustful attraction for the sex, she gathered.

She had always believed that their sexual involvement evolved from watching each other’s movements as they fought. They each admired the other’s body and the fluid, graceful motions of the other fighter. They liked the feel of each other when they battled, so it was a one-thing-led-to-another type of situation, she concluded.

But, as she thought about what she was going through in the past hellish twelve days without the two things that she did with Kim and not seeing Kim, she just could not easily put a label on what they did or what they had. What she was feeling was not for the loss of a rival or even a bed buddy. There was something deeper to it, but she refused to acknowledge it. She told herself that her mind and body were just going through hallucinations from lack of proper stimulation. It had to be that simple, she convinced herself.


“What’s the stich, Wade?” Kim asked as she answered her Kimmunicator; she was hanging out at Bueno Nacho with Ron. The blonde boy was busying himself with extremely important research, in his opinion; he was attempting to see if it was humanly feasible to fit the entire naco in his mouth without injuring himself.

“It’s Drakken,” Wade reported.

“I’ve been wondering when he was going to show his cards,” the redhead commented.

“Yeah, do you remember back when he stole that little ray gun?”

“It looked like a kid’s toy, yeah,” she answered.

“Turns out that it was a small disintegrating ray.”

“You mean like a Marvin-the-Martian-against-Daffy-Duck disintegrating ray?” Kim asked in a curious tone.

“Pretty much.”

“O….kay,” she said for lack of a better response.

“Well, he took the whole thing apart to study it. See, it was a prototype and it really could only handle small things. He built one that is powerful enough to disintegrate Washington,” the computer genius informed them.

“That’s not that big,” Ron remarked.

“Washington state,” Wade clarified.

“Wait, Washington has a state now? When did this happen and why was I not informed?” the blonde inquired.

“Probably because it happened in 1889. Hard to believe he’s going to have a high school diploma in a couple of months,” Kim teased her best friend. “So, Wade, where can I find the good doctor?” she asked with a smile.

“Drakken’s hiding out on a small island right off the Atlantic coast. I’ve got you a ride there,” the boy replied.

“Wade, do I even have to say it?” she commented with a smile.

“Well, maybe just one more time.”

“You rock,” she informed him.

Shego was reclining in a chair, flipping through a magazine while Drakken raved to her about his beautiful “death ray.” The man had actually used the words “death ray” and he said them way more than necessary. In fact, she figured that the next time he even said the words “death” and “ray” in sequence referring to his weapon or not, she was going to make him eat his beloved pop gun.

She just was not in the mood to listen to him and had not been for a few days now. She thought that Drakken might get the hint that she did not want to hear his voice when she broke the table in half the other day while blatantly screaming at him to just shut up. He merely pointed out that she was more irritable than usual and had the nerve to ask if it was that time of the month. The only thing that kept her from hurting him badly, maybe even permanently, was the shock that went through her because he had the nerve to ask such a thing. He had wisely gone back to his machine while she was so flabbergasted.

“Shego! Are you listening to me?” Drakken demanded to know.

“You said something about bringing the world to its knees and forcing them to make you ruler of the whole blasted globe,” Shego guessed. All rants seemed to run along those lines when it came to megalomaniacs, she noted.

“Oh, you are listening,” he said in a surprised tone.

“Not really, you’re just that predictable. What’s this contraption anyway?” she asked as if she cared. She took the time out of her life to look at the weapon; it was a large, complex-looking onyx gun.

“I’ve only told you a dozen times!” he huffed.

“Yeah, well, twelve of those times I wasn’t listening and, if that’s the case, it won’t hurt you to tell me again,” she pointed out.

Drakken growled. “It destroys molecular bonds in anything that’s caught in its beam.”


“It makes the molecules of a structure collapse and that causes the structure to collapse.”

“Now, was that so hard?” she teased him.

“Don’t push your luck, Shego,” he grumbled.


Shego rolled her eyes and let Drakken go back to whatever it was he was doing; she was only physically at the lair at the moment. Her mind was all over the place and she doubted that it was going to get any better as she glanced at her watch. It was about time for Kim to come in; the hero’s arrival was damn near like clockwork. Shego could only wonder how that was going to play out. There was the small possibility that Kim might fight Drakken, but there was a stronger possibility of the “death ray” just not working.

The thief was taken from her thoughts as Kim and Stoppable burst onto the scene. They came through the automatic doors that led into the lair, which was an underground cave, and they were accompanied by a large number of guards. The henchmen were being taken down by Kim’s typical composed style and Ron helped out in his typical panicked and frenzied way. Shego often wondered if Ron was just faking his scared-to-death-of-everything nature because as stupid as he seemed, he never got seriously injured and he never got Kim seriously injured. But, there was always the chance that she was giving him too much credit and he was really an idiot.

“Shego!” Drakken called, wanting her to attack the heroes before they ruined his plans.

The raven-haired woman leaped out of her chair and into the fray; well, she leaped out of her chair anyway. She did go into the combat area and she just stood there. Kim and Ron finished off the goons and turned their attention to Shego.

“Um…” Kim said, clearly bemused now.

“I got Drakken!” Ron called and he ran off to go deal with the mad scientist, taking the easy job in Kim’s opinion. The two females were left to gawk at each other.

“So…” Kim said while staring at the wall.

Both ladies counted it as a good thing that they had not charged each other yet. They did not even know what they would do beyond a charge. They were relieved to see that the other was well and good, but they also noticed how tense things were between them. They noticed how tense and tight the other’s body was.

“Can’t really thumb war or ‘rock, paper, scissors’ this one, eh, Princess?” Shego remarked halfheartedly. She hated that something inside of her actually wanted her to just go to Kim and embrace her. No fighting, no passion, just a simple hug. She just wanted to feel the hero against her, where she belonged.

“I guess not,” the redhead conceded. She could not even make eye contact with Shego, fearing that her self-control would waver.

“Tell you what, let’s let the fellas decide this one,” Shego proposed.

Kim shrugged as acceptance; she was more than confident that Ron could take Drakken, especially if he got help from Rufus. She turned her attention to her best friend, who was chasing Drakken. They watched as Drakken ran to a control panel and started laughing; the heroes knew that was not a good sign.

“As soon as I hit this button, lasers will come from the ceiling and key right to you,” Drakken boasted, speaking to Ron, and then he hit the button.

“Ah!” Ron yelled as he ducked a laser that singed his hair.

The blonde proceeded to run around yelling at the top of his lungs like he was scared for his life while dodging the lasers. Drakken continued to laugh manically at the boy. And then, Ron suddenly slipped.

“Ron!” Kim gasped, thinking that a laser would surely hit him.

Ron caught himself from falling to the floor by grabbing the nearest thing to him, an onyx machine that happened to be the death ray. He accidentally spun the machine length side while trying to regain his balance and many of the lasers that would have cut him, sliced into the weapon. Drakken gasped in disbelief.

“My death ray!” the cerulean-skinned doctor shouted as the gun fell apart into many pieces; there went his latest scheme and it had taken so long to build.

“Boo-yah?” Ron said in a puzzled tone because he was pretty sure that he had foiled the evil plot, but he was not sure what he did.

“He is the very definition of dumb luck,” Shego remarked.

“No, no. It’s dumb skill,” Kim corrected her rival.

“So, rock, paper, scissors for the getaway?”

“I don’t think we have time for that,” Kim commented as the death ray, or what was left of it, began exploding.

“Leave it to him to make a self-destructive death ray,” Shego sighed. “Later, Princess.”

Shego grabbed Doctor Drakken while Kim grabbed Ron and they all made their escape while the lair not only went up in flames, but also caved in on itself. The good guys went one way and the bad guys went another once they were above ground. All Kim and Shego could think about was how much they wanted to just touch each other, a simple touch, while Ron was hyped from saving the day all by himself. Kim decided to treat him to anything that he wanted from Bueno Nacho since he did save the whole world.

Next time: One of the ladies gives up. Which one? Check the final chapter to see who wins.

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