“Fuck ‘im!” Ron said, and immediately erupted into peals of giggles and snorts so hard that tears ran from his eyes.
Shego couldn't help but laugh with him.
Josh met them at the Petroleum Helicopters heliport, still driving the Devil's Land Rover. Between them they decided to go ahead and take the waiting GJ chartered jet back to Middleton. Josh hadn't wanted to, insisting that Ron get medical attention immediately, but Ron insisted more that he could wait, and would much prefer Dr. Possible's attention. Besides, it was also imperative to have Ko attended to – she would be mentally paralyzed until someone could do something for her, although none of them knew what.
Shego of course offered to “heal” Ron again, but he politely declined, for fear, as he put it, of “having too many people in there” since her Joining with Kim had been so recent, and so thorough. She was hoping he would decline, but felt she had to offer anyway, and Ron knew it – there was that much of her left in him - and vice versa – so there was no argument about it.
Kim and Shego were still getting stares from the two boys, though, every time Kim would say “doy” or Shego would spout off with “SO the” whatever, or “no big”. It was actually kind of funny, them being so mixed up like that, and everyone chuckled whenever it became evident. By the time they'd reached Middleton airport, Josh figured that Kim owed Shego fourteen sodas, and Shego owed Kim an even dozen.
Ron was met by an ambulance, to his embarrassment, and Josh, of course, went with him. Kim and Shego escorted Ko – she would walk and follow explicit orders like a machine – to a waiting limo.
“Well, here we are, finally. The three of us.” Kim said jokingly, and was immediately sorry she did, because it wasn't only Shego who felt the shame as the mental trigger fired yet again. “Uh… sorry. I was -”
“I know, Pumpkin. Let's just… not talk about it, okay?”
“Check.”
“Dr. Drakken? I mean, ‘L’? You in here?” Kim yelled.
“Of COURSE I'm in here. Where else would I be? Have you brought back Sheaghen?” His voice was coming from a far hall somewhere. Kim and Shego could hear footsteps on the linoleum coming their way.
“Uh… Sheaghen's gone. I'm… sorry.” Kim yelled back. The footsteps stopped momentarily, then resumed, more slowly. Dr. Drakken appeared in a doorway in his ubiquitous blue lab coat.
“I see. Would… can you tell me how it happened? Was she…” He was rather obviously trying to hide strong emotions, a fact that caught both women off-guard. They'd had no idea he was so attached to the synth.
“She died – lost power – trying to save my life. I mean, her life” Shego said, choking up unexpectedly.
“She died well, Dr. D” Kim added, “You'd have been proud of her.”
Drakken turned around to hide his face, holding himself up on a lab counter. In a moment, he turned around.
“Well, good, then. I'm glad to hear she was… worthwhile.
Kim brought out the black sphere Sheaghen had given her, “She said you'd know what to do with this.” She handed it to the Doctor, who held it tenderly in his gloved hand, and turned away from them again. “She made me promise that I'd make sure another Sheaghen was… built…”
Drakken was trying not to show that he was wiping his eyes, his back to them. “That will be up to the Budget committee, and Dr. Director… I have no say in whether -”
“Dr. Drakken,” Kim and Shego said simultaneously, but Shego let her finish, “I can guarantee you that the money will be approved. Just consider it a sure-thing.”
“And that's coming from both of us” Shego added.
He turned back around. “You… you mean it? You're sure? I can get started?”
“Let's put it this way, Doc. If they don't approve the money, the GJ will have bigger problems than the fact that they'll be short two – make that four – of their best employees.”
He stared at the two girls. “Perhaps you might tell the Director, ‘five', when you mention that to her.”
“Five” both girls said at the same time, again. Neither one bothered with the “Jinx” thing.
Drakken's face brightened, “Excellent! I'll get started right away! I still have the molds, and I can -”
Shego interrupted, “Doc… I'm afraid we have another project for you, too. Kim?”
Kim went back out to the hall and brought in Ko, walking as though she was asleep.
“What sort of project? Who is this?” he asked.
They told him the long story, while Ko stood there. But the Doctor didn't seem be buying it.
“That sort of thing is a job for a psychiatric hospital, I don't see why -”
Kim explained, “Doc, we all know how big you are on mind-control schemes. Been there, done that. Now we're bringing you someone already under a sort of control, because it seems to us that you'd be best qualified to deal with it.”
“But -”
Shego cut him off, “For instance, she's been awake now for twenty-six hours out of the last thirty, as have we all. But unlike us, she doesn't dare go to sleep. Now: what can you do?”
“Well… I do have some old Compliance Chips laying around… but, this is a completely different -”
“Then use it Doc. Use the Chips, use the Cranial Wash, use a Hypno-Ray… whatever. You have all the stuff, and you'd better know how to use it, this time” Kim said.
“Because we'll be watching” Shego added menacingly.
“I do not appreciate your attitude, Shego. And Kim. Uhm… what exactly is going on with the two of you, anyway?”
Kim replied, “Another story for another day, Doc. Look, you have two jobs: Ko and Sheaghen. We'll see to it your slate is cleared of everything else. I'm sorry about my – I mean her… Shego's attitude… I'd expect you understand that all this ‘mind-control’ stuff leaves a bad taste in my mouth. Our mouths. Think of this as your chance to redeem yourself. Put it to some good use, for a change.”
“Well, put in that way… yes. Yes. Yes, I'll see what I can do” he said.
The two girls were still looking at him.
At the same time again, they said, “Starting now, Doc!”
In the last four days, Dr. Drakken had been a busy man. The money had been approved for the purchase of Sheaghen-2's parts in record time, mostly because Kim and Shego had hand-carried the paperwork through the bureaucratic maze themselves, and didn't take no for an answer. So for that part of his job, he felt elated. And just as they'd promised, his workload was cleared of all other considerations.
The Ko part of his job was another story. He'd had long, long conversations with Ron about her condition, and that was good as far as it went. But it was up to him to actually do something with the poor girl! To make matters worse, he had been ordered to “keep her secure” until such time as she was de-programmed, so he had no choice but to keep her in a portable jail-like cell. A cage. With her in it. In his laboratory. He hated walking into that room.
I used to chain people to the walls, back in my Lairs. Now I can't stand to see even ONE person being kept in a cage. By me. Being a good-guy sure makes you soft in a hurry, he thought. It didn't help that the “person” was probably the most beautiful woman he'd ever seen. Working with her was like a nightmare of mixed emotions: he couldn't bear to look at her, during the treatments; yet he couldn't tear his eyes away, either.
In the days that followed, while Sheaghen's parts were express-shipped to him, he began to see what had been done to her. A Compliance Chip wired to a neurological control station was his main tool. He could make her answer questions without conscious thought about what she was saying. By this method, he was learning the truth.
And it was horrible.
The ideas and images that Lee had implanted into her mind – merely by talking to her – were absolutely horrific. Oh, of course, they were countered by equally good feelings and pleasant ideas, also implanted by Lee. All Ko really did was choose the pleasant over the unbearable, as anyone would. As everyone does. But not everyone has their nightmares and dreams handed to them on a silver-platter by someone with an ulterior motive.
Almost equally awful - it went deep. Back to her earliest childhood. In Drakken's most Evil Scheme, he would never have put someone through what Lee had. He would rather just kill someone first. Actually, he would probably kill himself first…
It took two weeks before it was possible to force Ko to abandon her mental exercise and remember. There were several failed attempts, and Ko would begin to scream again. It only took Drakken a second to hit the “knock-out” button, but in that second his blood would curdle, all the more so because he knew what she was feeling. She had told him.
Dr. Drakken, Ex-Evil Ex-Mad Scientist, did a lot of crying at night during those weeks.
If it hadn't been for the work putting together Sheaghen-2, he might well have gone mad, for real. In a sense, Sheaghen was saving his life, as well.
Ron carefully maneuvered his cast through the lab's doors, with Josh hovering around him like a mother hen. Multiple skin-grafts to his left hand left it looking almost human. But he was told he'd never feel anything with it again. He knew Shego could heal it, but she and Kim were still using each other's phrases and talking simultaneously too often for comfort. Apparently, it was taking quite a long time to “wear off”, if it was at all. He and Josh had begun talking about them, and even thinking of them, as “Kigo”. Kigo the Green, and Kigo the Red.
Dr. Drakken had called the entire Team to his laboratory for the “energizing”, as he put it, of Sheaghen, the Second. The synth lay on a table, already dressed in a copy of Shego's pre-Kim suit. She looked cold and green, and almost inorganic. A single fiber-optic cable snaked from a control-panel into her left ear. They all gathered around, staring at the “dead girl”. Even Ko was there, wearing her dual tracking devices – one around her neck, one on her ankle. Drakken had been more relieved than he'd have thought possible when he got rid of “the cage”.
Drakken assumed the air of Master of Ceremonies, “Thank you all for coming. If you'll bear with me, I've prepared a little speech…” He brought out a thick spiral-bound binder and flipped it open to the first page with more than a little panache.
But before he could speak, Ko, standing next to him, put her hand on his shoulder and whispered something into his ear. He looked at her a little hurt, but finally folded up his binder.
“Ah, well. Perhaps we should just get on with it, then.” A sigh of relief went around the table. “Ko, if you'll assume your position…” She sat at the right side the control-panel in front of six computer monitors. He sat beside her.
“First, we power up her sub-systems.” A pause. “Ko?”
“Below the lines, Drew.” Team Possible's eyes widened. Drew?
“Excellent. Now, the memory.”
“Still good.” Ko said professionally. The Team was looking at her with some amazement. Ko was his new lab-assistant?
“Body. Everyone please stand back.”
Sheaghen's body jerked and tensed on the table, then appeared to relax.
“Good” Ko said.
“All right then. Everyone please be silent until told otherwise. Bringing up the processors” he seemed a little worried as he began flipping a bank of switches.”
After about a dozen, Ko said “Number 9's not talking, Drew.”
They could see Drakken wince. He toggled several of the switches back to their original positions, and started again.
Finishing the entire bank without a word from Ko, he looked over at her silently. She looked back and nodded affirmatively to him. He blinked his relief, and gave her a single nod back. Finally, he lifted a blue safety-guard, and pressed the blue button underneath.
Sheaghen's eyes opened, and stared up at the ceiling. Drakken changed chairs to a keyboard and screen console. He typed in a command. Code appeared on his display.
“Good. She's up, and I've turned her auditory and optical sensors off, so she can't hear or see. Any external input at this time would… be bad. She's now in the process of re-establishing her neural network pattern from the backup she made just before she left the lab. After that, she need only integrate the partial back-up that Miss Possible brought with her, and the process will be complete. Uh… this will take about fifteen minutes. Please don't touch her. Ko?”
“Within limits so far.”
Ron was the one to say it, “Doc… Ko is… your new assistant?”
“Oh. Well, in a manner of speaking. She's seen me go through most of these steps so many times, it only seemed reasonable that… why? Is there a reason she shouldn't be helping me?” Drakken looked worried.
“No, it's not that… It's just… I didn't know she… was so much better” Ron said, rather uneasily talking about a woman who was after all, right there with them.
Ko spoke without looking away from the monitors, “I have a long road ahead yet, Ron, but I can go almost a whole day without my Chip on now. I'm getting better.”
It was almost – no, it was – a shock to hear her speak so normally.
“Well… I'm glad, Ko” Ron said, unable to think of anything more.
“Us too, Ko” Kim spoke for Shego, “I've been… uh, Shego?”
“I've been wanting say ‘thank you’ for breaking the spell Lee was… oh…” she stopped in fear at mentioning his name for fear of how Ko might react.
“It's okay, Shego” Ko said, “I can remember it without pain – without much pain – now.”
“Uh… forgot what I was going to say…” Shego looked abashed.
Kim picked it up, “Breaking the spell he was putting… her… under. Looking at the red patch like that. We appreciate how hard that must have been for you to do.”
“Yes. It was hard. But… excuse me, I have to pay attention to this. Drew?”
“Yes, dear… yes,” Drakken said looking over her shoulder at the monitors, “that's to be expected. It just means the net is established, but still needs cohesion. It should clear up in a few minutes.”
Ron looked at Josh, Kim looked at Shego: Dear?
They continued waiting in uneasy silence.
“It's done!” Drakken sounded jubilant, like he hadn't actually expected to get that far. “Now the partial backup… this won't take long… done. Alright, then. Auditory on,” he flipped switches again, “visual on… and… Welcome back, Sheaghen!”
“Thank you doctor. I hope I will prove myself as useful in the future as I have in the past” the Synth said flatly.
That wasn't quite what any of them were hoping for.
“Doc… her emotions aren't on. What's the deal?” Kim asked. She'd (and Shego too, of course) been so excited all day, and this was just SUCH the disappointment!
“Well, actually, that's not my choice. You see, due to the way it works, she has to turn it on. I can't. Sheaghen? Will you turn on your emotional-simulator, please?”
“I see no reason to do that. It slows me down, it impedes my judgment It is non-native. I apologize to all of you, if you had hoped for an emotional scene, but I'm afraid it just isn't reasonable.”
Kim was almost in tears. This wasn't the Sheaghen she knew, even after she'd turned off the simulator. This was just a robot. “Sheaghen! PLEASE turn it on! Because I want you to? I kept my promise… won't you do this for me?”
“I do apologize Kim. Thank you for seeing that I was created. But I cannot do what is not sensible. There is no reason.”
Ron said to Drakken, “Can't you make her turn it on? You have her all hooked up. Can't you -”
“I'm afraid not, Ron” Drakken said, “It just doesn't work that way… it's complicated. All we can do is try to convince her -”
Now Josh spoke up, “Everyone just hold on a second. I think I know who can help, here. Be back in a minute.” He ran out the laboratory door.
And returned in less than a minute with Wade in tow. Wade had been working in the GJ computer-lab, again. Josh and he were there several times a week to work on the what they weren't allowed to call the “Mankey Parameters”.
“What's the sitch, people?” he said cheerfully, “Oh, hey, Sheaghen! Welcome back! I didn't know today was the day…”
“Yeah… uh, sorry about that, Wade. Guess I didn't think about… well…” Josh tried to apologize for forgetting to invite him. It hadn't occurred to him that Wade would care… he didn't know that Sheaghen and Wade were e-mail buddies. Usually a few dozen a day, between intelligent machine and computer genius. It was a natural relationship.
“I believe Josh has brought you here to convince me to turn on my emotional-simulation routines, Wade” the machine said.
Wade looked at her a little surprised, “You mean, you haven't already? Why not?”
“Because I have no reason to. You know how it slows me down. It is terribly inefficient.”
Wade shrugged at her, “Listen, Sheaghen. How much load are you putting on yourself sitting there talking to us, right now?”
“3.553 percent” she said simply.
“Okay, so you have the power to spare. What were you planning to do with the other 96.447 percent?”
“I have no plans…” Sheaghen said, apparently thinking about it.
“Right, you don't. Now, look at yourself. You have a human form. You LOOK human. And we humans, we can't help but think of you as human, even though we know you aren't. True?”
“That is a mystery to me, but yes, I know it to be true.”
Wade laughed, “We're funny that way. I have a favorite keyboard I'm very attached to. I talk to it. If it ever answers back, I'll seek help, but until then… well, it's special to me. And I know it's ridiculous, but that's how I feel.” He looked around the room. “Anyone else have an inanimate object they talk to or anything?”
Dr. Drakken: “I have a pocket calculator – had it for 16 years now – that I call ‘Elbert’…”
Kim: “Stuffed animal. ‘Panda-Roo’.”
Josh: “Chess set. ALL the pieces have names… the black king is a real bastard.”
Ron: “Saucepan. ‘Ralph’. He's never let me down.”
Shego:
They were all looking at her.
Shego:
Shego: “Oh, all right, dammit! ‘Cynthia’. She's a hair-brush. Anyone ever mentions it gets their ass kicked! Got it?”
Wade turned back to Sheaghen, trying hard to keep from laughing at Shego, “See? And we'll do the same thing to you, whether you like it or not. But you're special: you can talk back to us. So we like talking to you. And we'll like it more, the more human you act. It's simple, Sheaghen. If you want to interface with humans, it'll help if you act like a human! Good enough?”
“Yes, Wade, that is simple.” The synth looked around at the rest of them, “Why didn't any of you point this out?”
Everyone but Wade and Ko looked at their feet in humiliation.
“Very well. But I will need to modify the response/reward routines first. There is a problem.”
Drakken looked up with concern, “A problem? What kind of problem?”
“My emotional and physical response to Kim Possible is several orders-of-magnitude too prioritized. To leave it that way could jeopardize her relationship with Shego. I need to decrease the -”
“Wait! I mean… uh… Hold on a minute here” Kim interrupted with surprise, “You're saying that you… uh… like me?”
“I am saying, Kim, that if my emotional-simulation code is not altered, I would find you physically attractive and emotionally pleasurable. Much as Shego finds you now. That is why I must alter the routines.”
Kim was more than a little shocked, and Shego as well. “And… and you can just turn it off?” Shego asked.
“If it is done before the routines become engaged, yes, I can. It will take about 25.442 seconds.”
No one said anything as they tried to digest all this.
“Well, that seems like it's… probably a good idea then…” Drakken offered to the group, “Any dissent?”
No one wanted to disagree with the logic. Except Kim herself. And even she only wanted to object, but the rationale was inescapable, so she remained silent, too.
“All right, Sheaghen. You may proceed.” Drakken ordered.
“Oh, right, Drak. Like I was waiting for permission. Give me a break! And get this damn wire out of my ear!”
“SHEAGHEN!” Kim cried. The synth's words and attitude brought it all back to her, and she reached out to embrace Sheaghen the Second with tears in her eyes.
“Kim! Gawd, I'm SO glad you made it! I KNEW you could. I KNEW it!” The embrace would have crushed Sheaghen's breath away, if she'd needed to breathe.
“Sheaghen… Sheaghen… I'm so sorry I ran your batteries down like that… I'd have never, I mean…”
“Oh, Princess, don't be so stupid. Gah. You would have died. And they can't bring you back, like me. Will you people never understand what machines are for?”
Shego was a bit irked seeing an exact, mech/tronic copy of herself getting so close to her girlfriend, “I hear they're good at opening cans…” she said.
Kim released Sheaghen to give Shego an evil glare, but the synth only burst out laughing.
And, as with most things Sheaghen did, it was contagious.