Mystery Kigo Theatre 3000 of Maternal Instinct

Chapter 3: My Life with Kimmie

A board smile was plastered on Monique's face as she drove through the streets of Middleton.

K: “Monique has been tripping balls since a quarter past eight this morning.”

The smile was due to the fact that she was driving her own car. Her car, not her family's, hers. Add to that the fact that it was a brand new car and she couldn't help but laugh joyfully when she thought about it. Originally, it was supposed to be a graduation present from her father, but once he found out there was a limited time deal on this particular car he couldn't wait.

S: “Getting it out of the impound lot was the least of her worries… now if the cops just hadn't found the 50 kilos of Lebanese blond hash she had hidden in the wheel wells…”

So he gave it to her as an early present with the added stipulation that she keep her grades up until graduation. She had only the vaguest memories of agreeing to the deal before she jumped into the car and took it for a test drive.

K: “Monique had been drinking heavily at the time, downing Quaaludes with quarts of Wild Turkey…”

That “test drive” ended up encompassing most of the city, particularly the hot spots for most of her classmates, and more importantly, the cute guys. She was showing off she knew, but she didn't really care. In fact, she had a right to show it off. It was a beautiful new convertible in a blazing red that perfectly matched her favorite dress. Her father had mentioned make and model, horsepower, and all the technical features she couldn't ever hope to understand. The only thing that mattered to her was that it looked good and she looked good in it.

K: “Hu, hu… pretty!”

After she finished cruising around the hot spots, she decided the next thing she had to do was show it off to Kim. The girl was just going to freak when she saw it. The thought made Monique's smile go so wide it threatened to split her face in half.

S: “Ow!”

Kim would insist on going for a ride, as soon as she picked her jaw off the ground.

S: “No shit, considering you just split her face in half!”

And being such a good friend, how could she refuse? After all how better to taunt the single men then with two available women in a red hot convertible?

“Hey cutie!” a voice called out.

K: “Hey good looking! I'll be back to pick you up later!”

S: “How in the Hell do you know anything about `Mr. Microphone’?”

Working already, she thought with a smirk.

She peaked over the top of her sunglasses into the review mirror to get a look at her new admirer. Unfortunately, all she could see was the car he was driving. It was a blue Dodge Viper with a silver and red engine showing through the flame pattern painted on the hood. The windows were all tinted yellow which made it hard for her to make out the driver. The fact that all the windows were up made her wonder just how he had been able to call out to her, but she shrugged it off.

“You like what you see?” she called back flirtatiously.

“Oh yeah! Looking good!” the mysterious driver complimented.

“Why thank you. I appreciate it.”

“Not you, the car.”

Say what?

When she looked in the rearview again she saw that the driver was now closer to her rear bumper. A little too close. She stepped on the gas to try and put some distance between them but he kept pace. So much so that she actually nudged the bumper a few times. Thankfully it wasn't enough to cause her to serve out of control, but it was freaking her out. Especially the way he was doing it. It was almost like he was trying to…nuzzle the car. She jerked the wheel to try to shake him off but it did little good.

“Come on baby, don't be like that!” he cried out.

Monique almost screamed in frustration and was about to start hurling things from the glove compartment at the obsessed driver when the sounds of sirens split the air. Another look in the mirror confirmed that a police car style Lambourgini was coming up fast on the Viper behind her, red lights flashing brightly She smiled broadly at the black and white car and even more so when it forced the other to the side of the road. Once she was out of danger she slowed her car down at as well and wondered if she could stop completely incase the officer needed her to make a statement. As she stared back at the police car two things stuck out as odd in her mind. 1) It had Japanese writing on the its door and 2) most importantly, there was no one driving it! In fact, looking more closely at the Viper she could finally make out why the driver had been so hard to see; there was none. She stared a second longer before she flipped her shades back up and hit the gas again.

S: “Did you get any of that?”

K: “No… it's probably some sort of anime reference.”

“I did not just see that,” she told herself firmly.

The rest of her trip was thankfully uneventful and her earlier excitement returned as she pulled up to Kim's house. She practically jumped out of the car once it was parked in front of the Possible residence and sprinted up to the door. She took a few deep breaths to calm herself and made sure she stood between Kim's line of sight and her car. When she was sure she was ready she rang the bell. It took only a moment for Mrs. Possible to answer the door.

“Oh hi Monique,” she greeted cheerfully.

S: (as Mrs.Dr.P) “Did Kimmie knock you up, too?”

“Hey Mrs. Possible. Is Kim here?” Monique asked, barely containing her excitement.

K: “… or her bowels.”

“Well she is, but…”

“It's fine mom,” Kim's voice spoke from behind her.

“Are you sure?”

“Positive.”

K: “You're suffocating me! Just back off, old woman!”

Kim's mother looked at for a second then nodded and left the two girls alone, leaving Monique in a slight state of confusion. It was quickly forgotten when she remembered why she dropped by and her face cracked with a smile once again.

K: “I'll have to talk to Mo-Mo about that. She needs to see a doctor about her face.”

“Girl I have a big surprise for you!” she exclaimed cheerfully.

K: “Knowing Monique, I'm guessing that her surprise takes D-batteries.”

“Really? Cause I have one too actually,” Kim replied sheepishly.

K: “I'm really a man!”

S: “Well, that would make a more plausible explanation of how you knocked me up.”

“Mine first! Close your eyes.”

Kim quirked an eyebrow at the odd request but complied nonetheless. She then felt Monique grab her wrist and lead her outside. From how far they walked she could tell they stopped near the curb when her friend told her to open her eyes. When she did she found Monique leaning on the door to a brand new convertible with a look of pride on her face that told Kim everything she needed to know. Still she was amazed by it all.

“How…” she managed to say after a few seconds.

“My dad got it for me,” Monique explained happily. “It was supposed to be a graduation present but…well let's just say things worked out in my favor.”

“No kidding,” Kim said as she ran her fingers along the door's edge. “It's spakin’.”

“I know! Come on, let's go cruise around town and tease some guys.”

Kim faltered a bit at the suggestion. She turned to her friend with a downcast look.

“I'm sorry Monique, but…I can't,” she said.

Monique wanted to kick herself for being so stupid. Of course Kim wouldn't want to go cruising for guys with her because the girl was still reeling from her break up with Ron. She mentally cursed herself as she stepped closer to Kim and placed an apologetic hand on her friend's shoulder.

“Sorry girl that was stupid of me,” she said softly. “I shouldn't have brought that up so soon after…”

“Yeah,” Kim sighed in acknowledgement of what she was talking about. “That is part of it, but there's something else now too.”

S: “Gravy?”

“Oh?” Monique gave her a sideways glance.

“It's actually my big surprise. But I think we should talk about it inside.”

K: “I'm dating the entire Middleton Football Team! Isn't that great!”

This time it was Monique's turn to be confused and lead away in good faith as she followed Kim back into the house. The distressed look on her friend's face told her something big was up. Or at least she thought it had to be big to cause Kim to seem so worried. It reminded her a lot of when she first broke up with Ron actually. Whatever it was, she was determined to be there for her friend. Maybe she couldn't go with her on world saving missions, but at the very least she could provide a shoulder to lean on.

When she entered the Possible household she was greeted with an unusual site. A dark haired, pale-green skinned woman dressed in a black and green cat suit came walking groggily through the living room. She only made slight muttering noises to acknowledge either of their presences before she disappeared into the kitchen. Monique watched in stunned confusion then turned to Kim who only looked embarrassed and uncertain. She looked back to where the woman had gone and peaked around the corner to try and get another look at her. She could swear she had seen her somewhere before.

“Kim…isn't that the woman who's picture you have in your locker?” she asked, pointing towards the kitchen. “A picture on a wanted poster?”

K: “Whew!”

S: “What?”

K: “I thought for a minute that she'd seen the nude one of you that I keep in my gym locker.”

“Well…yeah,” the redhead admitted sheepishly. “Look you better sit down for this. It's a long story and I'm not sure even I believe it when I really think about it.”

Monique's confusion only grew, but again she trusted her friend and sat down on the couch, Kim sitting next to her. When they settled in Kim explained as best she could how the other woman, Shego had ended up pregnant with a child that was partial hers thanks to Drakken's screw up and was now going to be living with her family at least until the baby was born.

S: “Damn, no gravy…”

K: “You know, in a few more chapters he'll get the whole explanation down to, like, three words.”

Monique just stared blankly and blinked several times as she tried to process the information. Her best friend was going to be the “father” to a baby that was being carried by a woman who use to work for her archrival and constantly beat her up all the while trying to finished up the last year of high school, including cheer squad and all her other after school activities and, knowing Kim, still doing the world saver bit. When she was finally able to wrap all that around her brain there was only one thing she could say.

“Wow. You sure beat my surprise.”

Kim was silent for a moment before laughing loudly. It was such a strong laughter that she had to hold onto her sides and fall back onto the couch.

S: “… breaking wind in the process.”

She didn't know why she was laughing so loudly and she didn't really care either. After all that had happened to her yesterday it good to feel something other than confusion and anxiety. The fit lasted nearly two minutes and when it finally subsided she looked up at Monique, who now looked even more concerned for her. She sat back up on the couch and shook her head in an attempt to calm her friend.

“I'm sorry,” she said, wiping a tear away from her eye. “I know it wasn't that funny it's just that…” she paused and sighed. “This has all been a lot to take in so I'm kind of out of it.”

“Just as long as you don't mean out of your mind I think I can deal with it,” Monique replied.

“Thanks.”

“Like you say, no big.” She paused. “So did you tell Ron about this yet?”

“He was there when she told me.”

“Oh. So…how did he take it?”

K: “He whimpered like a little girl.”

“Well…” she started and ran a hand nervously through her hair. “We didn't really get much time to talk about it. Like I said, it all happened pretty quickly. I think he was just about as freaked out as I was.”

“But you were able to get this girl to the hospital and bring her back here to convince your family to stay with you,” the other girl said in a matter-of-factly voice.

“Yeah…I guess I was. I didn't really think about it though, it all just sort of…happened. Like I was in automatic or…”

“Giving in to your natural Kimness?”

Kim gave her an indignant look. “You know, when you and Ron say it like that it sounds like a bad thing.” She then fell back into the couch. “But you're right. I didn't really think it through, I just sort of reacted.”

“And now you're starting to regret it?”

“Well…not really. It's just…I really don't know what I'm going to do.”

K & S: “I don’ know where I'm-a gonna go when the volcano blow!”

“It is a lot to deal with,” the dark haired girl agreed. She looked over at her friend and against placed a reassuring hand on her shoulder. “But hey, I'm here for you and even though there's still some weirdness there I'm sure Ron will be too.”

“You're right,” Kim nodded, feeling relieved for the first time since the other day.

Monique nodded as well as if to she were allowing Kim to feel relieved. The two slipped into a somewhat comfortable silence. Knowing that there was a lot that Kim was probably feeling over-whelmed about, who wouldn't, Monique slipped an arm around her best friend and drew her into a hug.

S: “Get your hands off my woman!”

K: “Relax, it's not like I'm going to get her preg… never mind.”

Actions speak louder than words they say, and what better way to show support than a comforting hug? Kim was naturally surprised by the gesture but returned it all the same.

“Awww, how sweet,” a snide voice remarked behind them. “I think I'm gonna be sick.”

Kim withdrew from the hug and glared at the person who made the off handed comment.

“I know you don't like showing emotions Shego, but don't have to be-” she started, but was cut off by the woman in question.

“No, I'm really going to be sick,” Shego replied, holding a hand over her mouth and looking greener than usual. “Bathroom?”

“Down the hall, second door on the left.”

She ran out of the room without another word leaving the two friends alone once again. Monique stared at the spot the green skinned woman had been standing in a moment longer before she turned back to the Kim.

S: “BLARRRGH!”

“I gotta ask, what is with that outfit?” she asked.

S: “BLARRRGH!”

“It's a super villain thing. I never really understood it either,” Kim replied with a shake of her head. “I think it's the only thing she has to wear. Which will probably be a problem later on when…” she finished her thought by making a curving motion over her stomach.

S: “BLARRRGH!”

“Yeah it does look kind of constricting.” Monique's eyes suddenly lit up. “Oooh girl I just had a brainstorm. We make a quick Club Banana run and help your girl get some new outfits. Ones that aren't skin tight and multicolored.”

S: “BLARRRGH!”

Kim scrunched her nose at the thought. “I…don't know. That seems like it might be a bad idea. Although…she will need maternity clothes sooner or later. If they even have maternity clothes at Club Banana.”

S: “BLARRRGH!”

“You know it's funny, we don't sell those but we do sell baby clothes. They're in our Plantains line.”

S: “BLARRRGH!”

“Taking the banana thing a bit too far, aren't we?”

S: “BLARRRGH!”

“Hey it wasn't my idea.”

S: “BLARRRGH!”

K: “Ok! Cut it out!”

“Well anyway, I'm not sure how much that will help us. Though…” she placed a finger on her chin in thought. “I suppose it wouldn't hurt to look through some baby clothes now just to see what's out there. And Shego could use from normal clothes to wear. I guess we'll just have to look elsewhere for maternity things.”

“You could always try-” Monique started but Kim cut her off.

“Do not say Smarty Mart!”

“I was going to suggest J.B. Nickel's. I know they have some maternity things.”

“Oh,” Kim replied, embarrassed. “Sorry I guess I was expecting a Ron answer.”

“Don't worry. But if anyone asks, I didn't tell you about it. Looks kinda bad when an employee tells one of our best customers to go to another store.”

“My lips are sealed.”

K: “That reminds me, can I borrow your `Go-Go's’ CD?”

Right after the agreement was made, Shego came back into the room a little worse for wear. She made a few grunting noises towards Kim and Monique before she plopped down into the recliner usually reserved for Kim's father. Kim was about to correct on it, but pushed it back for later. Instead she decided to check on the woman's well being.

“How are you feeling?” she asked.

S: “A little like Linda Blair, but otherwise…”

“A little better, but I gotta say I'm not looking forward to throwing up most of what I eat. You're out of mouthwash by the way,” Shego replied.

S: “… and I'd appreciate it if you would buy a new toilet brush.”

“I guess we'll have to pick some up while we're out.”

The older woman arched an eyebrow at the statement. “Oh? Going out somewhere, are you?”

“Yes we,” Kim started, inclining her head towards Shego, “are going out to get you some new clothes.”

“Really? And did we come to this decision?”

“Shego please. You're going to need maternity clothes eventually anyway and while you're staying here it's probably best if you don't wear that thing,” the redhead made vague gesture's to the green and black cat suit.

“Hey, I'll have you know this is a very stylish look.”

K: “Yeah, for the circus!”

“Yeah, of bad taste.”

K: “Hey, the movie's riffing itself!”

“Honey I wouldn't be talking about taste if I was wearing a lime green tank top.”

S: “Check!”

“Oooh,” Monique grimaced.

Kim only cast her a sideways glance then returned to attention to Shego.

“This from the woman in a skin tight unitard!” she countered

“At least I'm not wearing boy's pants.”

S: “Check and mate!”

Kim looked like she was going to say something, but stopped and calmed herself with a shake of the head. She looked at Shego again and spoke in the calmest voice she could muster.

“Look, we're going to go to the mall and you can pick out whatever you want, I don't care. But we have to get maternity clothes. And so we won't arouse anymore suspicion, I'll let you borrow some of my clothes for the day. I think we're about the same size.”

K & S: (looking each other over) “BWAH HAH HAH!”

“Just one question,” Shego said.

“What?” Kim asked through gritted teeth.

“Since when did I become your new sidekick to boss around?”

“I am not bossy!” the redhead shouted then turned to Monique. “Monique, am I bossy?”

K: (as Monique) “Mm-mm, girlfriend… you couldn't be more `bossy’ if you said, `Moo’.”

“Oh no, I'm not getting in the middle of this one,” she replied, shaking head and waving her hands.

“Well, she's smarter than you other sidekick,” Shego remarked.

Again Kim found herself at a loss for words and merely let out a frustrated scream before marching off to her room. Shego looked at Monique with a smug smile. She knew the girl probably couldn't understand what had just happened, but she took much satisfaction in the fact that, in same some way, she had won a fight with Kim Possible. Unfortunately, she also knew the princess was right; she needed something else besides her usual outfit to wear. Especially for when she started showing.

K: “Mmmmm…”

S: “Let me guess… you like pregos?”

K: “Hey, a pregnant woman is a beautiful woman!”

Of course that meant admitting that Kim had won in a way too and she was definitely not going to let her know that! She would just find a way to make it seem like she really wanted to go the mall all along and just couldn't help but have a little fun with the girl.

K: “Monique and Kim decided to secretly take Shego into `Clowns R Us…”

Yes, that would work perfectly.

The other thing she was definitely not going to do was wear anything of Kimmie's. She had seen some of the outfits the girl wore on missions, hell the mission clothes themselves left something to be desired, and none of it was right for her. Even if it was just for a few hours for one day there was no way she was going to wear them. Not no way, not no how.

S: “Go away, the Wizard's not home!”

---

Well this is embarrassing, Shego thought in dismay.

S: “… looking down at her new pair of clown shoes.”

She looked down at herself and again shuddered in disgust. After a prolonged verbal battle Kim had finally convinced her to wear one of younger woman's outfits. Mostly due to her trump card, the Puppy Dog Pout. Even with as cold as she could be at times, Shego just wasn't able to say no to that face. It was just so…she couldn't really think of what it was but it was almost impossible to turn down whatever request it wanted. If she was going to live with Kim for nine months then she'd have to find someway around it. Her father seemed to be able to shoot it down rather quickly; maybe she could ask him for advice.

That was a thought for later though. Her more immediate problem involved her state of dress. She was convinced Kim had picked out this particular outfit just to spite her. The first major flaw of it was that it was mostly pink. Pink pants and a white T-shirt with a pink heart on the front. She had always hated pink; it just seemed way too girly.

K: “She iss tuu gurly!”

Not that she ever saw herself as the true tomboy time but pink just seemed too stereotypical. Not to mention the fact that pale green and pink just didn't mix well at all.

K: “Like Pepto Bismal and broccoli!”

S: “BLARRRGH!”

K: “It's stopped being funny ten minutes ago!”

S: “Uh… no, I, uh… really threw up that time. Pepto and broccoli? That's gross…”

The other problem was that Kim had only been guessing that they were about the same size. For the most part they were, but Shego was slightly more…developed then Kim.

K: “Oh, yeah… my `babies'…”

Thus the shirt clung rather tightly to her bosom and showed off slightly more than just her mid drift. In fact, pretty much all of her stomach was exposed. She looked down again and ran a hand over her flat stomach subconsciously.

K: “Mmmmmmmm…”

S: “You're starting to make me fear for my life here!”

Thank God I'm not showing yet, she mused.

K: “Did we bring that blow drier in here? No? Shit…”

As much as the shirt seemed small and tight on her, the pants actually seemed to fit as well as they did on Kim. This just made her wonder how the girl had avoided having her pants fall off as much as the buffoon's did. There was a big enough gap in the front that Shego felt if she moved the wrong way she'd be exposing more than just her stomach.

K: “…”

S: “Ghaa! Kimmie! Get you're hand out… your hand… never mind… mmmm…”

Thankfully Kim had also let her burrow a pair of panties to keep such things from happening, or at least being less embarrassing. Actually when she thought about she believed Kim said she could let her keep that pair.

S: “Sell them on ebay and we'll split the proceeds.”

It left Shego feeling a little insulted by the insinuations.

K: “By means of a little alliteration.”

That could be deal with later though. Her immediate concern was the people pointing and staring at her. Thankfully, the usual hustle and bustle of a mall on Saturday kept most of the other consumers from really noticing her, but the few that did made her feel self conscious. It wasn't the actual staring that bothered her, she was used it by now, but rather the clothes she had on making her feel too exposed. Her suit may confirm to her every curve, but at least it covered all of her body, which Kim's clothes most definitely did not. Again, it was not as if she hadn't worn a few risqué outfits or swimsuits in the past but that when she had control of the situation.

S: “And was being well paid for it, I might add!”

At those times she wanted people to notice her body, but not a crowded public setting like this. She was nervous that all the attention might cause some law enforcement personal to realize who she was. After all, there weren't many pale green skinned, black haired, plasma spewing woman walking around.

She nearly leapt for joy when she, Kim, and Monique reached Club Banana but settled for simply darting into the store. It had little to do with the clothes inside and more about the fact that it offered her a place to hide if need be. Though the clothes were still appealing

K: “Get it? Club Banana clothing… `appealing?'”

S: “No, too easy!”

and it was the reason she was here after all. She did a quick sweep of the store to see if any police officers or undercover Global Justice agents where watching her and when she was sure it was safe, she began to look through the clothing selection. As she thought there were some good choices around, things that would look flattering on her before she started showing and after the birth if she had her way.

K: “Anything?”

S: “No, sorry.”

Unfortunately, she wasn't the only one making the decision. Far too soon for Shego's tastes, Kim came over and began suggesting ideas on what kind of clothes she should buy. This naturally led to another fight between the two of them. In fact, most of the intended shopping spree was taken up by their almost constant bickering. Most of it consisted of Shego telling Kim not to boss her around and Kim saying she was only trying to help. The back and fourth pattern continued for almost an hour, twin sets of emerald eyes burning brightly as they glared into one another. It only escalated when they looked through the baby clothes. Aside from Shego saying it was much too early to be thinking of that, she also refused anything that had even the slightest bit of pink on it. Kim thought it was traditional, while Shego thought it was stereotypical. The fight that ensued over that nearly brought mall security into play, before Monique was able to calm the two down.

K: “Anything yet?”

S: “Nope, still nothing.”

After much, much bickering, the two finally agreed on a rather extensive wardrobe for Shego. And by “agreeing” that of course meant Shego ignoring all of Kim's suggestions and going with what she wanted to buy. Even more distasteful to the younger redhead was the fact that Shego paid for her items with a credit card tied to one of her various bank accounts. Accounts Kim cared little for since they were filled with money either stolen or given as payment for evil deeds. Both options made her skin crawl slightly at the thought of it being used to help her child. Sadly she had little option at the moment, but she swore to herself that that would change by the time the baby was born.

S: “You really should collect a fee for all you're work, Kim.

K: “Fee? Heck, McCorkle and Schooley work for me. I own the full `KP’ rights. I'm rolling in the filthy green stuff! Cha-ching!”

By the time the outing was finished, the most worn out of the group was Monique. Having to be the referee for the two spirited women made her remember some of the babysitting jobs she had with bickering siblings. Or rather, more like an old married couple.

S: “Of course, if this were West Virginia, they could be both an old married couple and bickering siblings, at the same time.”

Either way, keeping them from tearing each others’ throats out was an exhausting job and she looked forward to going home and resting for a bit. Idly she wonder if she was going to be able to provide Kim the support she could need through this ordeal, but rationalized it by telling herself she would be better prepared next time. Still, she hoped the two would learn to behave around each other real quick.

As the trio left Club Banana and walked through the rest of the mall, they failed to notice the set of eyes staring at them in malicious glee.

K: “Crap, it's my Ex…”

S: “What?”

Even Shego's well trained vision had missed had missed Kim's other rival, but having never seen or heard off the girl before, how could she know to pay attention the brunette? The same girl that was currently watching them and who was wearing a smile more devious than anything she could come up with.

K: “Bonnie's after me because I'm behind on my child support payments from the kid we had together.”

S: “But… but I thought that what we had together was special!”

---

Just as Shego was nervous about people watching her in the mall, so too was Kim worried about her classmates staring at her as she sat at her usual table in the lunchroom. In her case it was slightly more justified though as many of them actually were watching her. For the most part it had to do with her choice of lunch time company; specifically one Ron Stoppable. It wasn't odd to see the two together by any means, but given what happened between them most of the students assumed they would keep their distance for awhile. That had been true, for the most part, during the last half of the summer, but by the time school had started, they worked out their differences to the point where they could be friends again. What made the situation the most frustrating and confusing was the fact that it was the talk of the school. In fact, their entire relationship, from the kiss they shared at the dance last year to their break up, was a hot topic, even going so far as to have an article written in the school paper about it.

S: “Dear Middleton `Dog-Pound’ Forum… I've only read about these kinds of things in your magazine before, and never thought that it would happen to me, but last week at the dance…”

Like most things in high school, the other kids seemed to prefer spreading rumors among themselves

K: “… almost as much as they liked spreading VD.”

rather than ask either of them what actually happened. Some of the rumors said Kim had been too bossy towards Ron while others suggested that Ron wasn't able to hold Kim's interests.

K: “Oh, he had a firm hold of my interests, all right!”

Some had him cheating on her with Monique while some had her cheating on him with some super stud she might have met in another country. The most accurate were the ones that implied that things just didn't work out between them. Fortunately, those rumors were the most prevalent and generated a great deal of sympathy for the duo. Mostly due to the general idea that what they had was the “true love” scenario: a guy and a girl who were best friends all their lives finally realizing their true feelings for each other and falling in love. It was supposed to be a happy ending, but it seemed things didn't always turn out the way they were supposed to.

The odd side effect of it all was that Ron suddenly became a veritable girl magnet.

K: “Other side effects may include…”

S: “Itching, swelling, flaking…”

K: “Pustules, blistering…”

S: “Those dirty rings…”

Girls that wouldn't give him a second look before, or a first one for that matter, were now casting sidelong glances his way during classes and especially here at lunch. Even some of the girls who had turned him down before admitted they had been wrong and apologized. For some reason it seemed that not being able to hold onto the great Kim Possible made Ron more attractive to the girls of Middleton High.

S: “Kimmie, what are you looking around for?”

K: “When you hear a sentence like that, Rod Serling's got to be around here somewhere.”

So it was that whenever the two would take their seats in the cafeteria they were met with stares from the other students ranging from sympathetic to confusion and in some cases flirtatious. While Kim usually felt a little uncomfortable and self conscious under their gazes, today she hardly noticed them. Instead she seemed fixated on the mushy noodles and discolored globs of meat that the lunch lady claimed was spaghetti and meatballs.

“S: “Because they reminded her Shego. Crap, I riffed myself, again!”

She sighed as she absentmindedly pushed the noodles around in the watery sauce with her fork.

“What's wrong KP?”

The voice broke through her haze in her mind and caused her to look up at the person who asked the question. There she saw both Ron and Monique giving her concerned looks. Even Rufus took time out from his snaking to see if she was alright.

K: “Why did it have to be snakes!”

She felt a little embarrassed by all the attention and tried to nonchalantly wave it off.

“It's nothing you guys,” she said half heartily. “Really, no big.”

“Really? Nothing at all? Like an evil sidekick carrying you're virus created baby?” Ron asked suspiciously.

S: “Next on Jerry Springer!”

“No of course not. That is so not the drama.”

Ron and Monique looked at each other unconvinced.

“Alright, it is a big and it so the drama!” Kim admitted after a moment and laid her head down on the table. She then titled her head so that only her eyes showed and stared at the two sadly. “Help me.”

K: “… Spock!”

“Hey come on KP,” Ron said, placing a comforting hand over hers. “We're here for you. I mean, I may not agree with it and find the whole thing sick and wrong, but I'm here for you.”

S: “… anytime after 4 PM tomorrow! Buh-bye!”

“Believe that girlfriend,” Monique added emphatically. “Here for you 100. I mean, who was it that took you and that Shego girl shopping over the weekend? And who kept you two from tearing each others’ heads off?”

“That was you,” Kim replied softly.

“And who was it that was there for you when you took her to hospital?” Ron asked.

“That was you, but you said we should just leave her and run. As far and fast as we can if I remember correctly.”

“Hey I panicked!” he stated in his own defensive. “I mean it was weird and potentially dangerous situation and I try to avoid those.”

S: “Like marrying a musician.”

K: “Or knowing folks that post on DeviantArt. Creepy!”

“Since when?” she asked, now sitting up right.

“Since…since it started to involve Shego having your baby through some weird Drakken thing!

K: “Next on Gerraldo!”

I mean you gotta admit that weird even for us.”

“Yeah I know, but this is gonna happen either way. And I guess…”

“You guess what?” Monique asked.

“I guess that it all just kinda hit me at once today. I mean…I'm going to be a mother. Or father. Or…whatever, the point is I'm going to have to raise a child.”

“With Shego no less,” Ron pointed out, before he took a bite of the meatball on his fork.

K: “Attention… this is your Principal. There has been a change in today's school lunch menu… the `meatballs’ have been replaced with `mountain oysters’. That is all.

“And that's another thing,” Kim sighed and ran her hand through her hair nervously. “I have to try to get her to calm down. Not only is she actually going to be giving birth to the baby she's also going to be living with my family. I just need to keep her from being so…so…”

“Shego like?” Ron offered.

K: “Bitchy?”

S: “Hey!”

“Yeah. When I bring up the subject of her being a little less…Shego like she…”

“Starts in with the shouting and fussing?” Monique asked.

K: “Ugh, me Shego! Bitch, bitch, bitch!”

S: “Cut it out!”

“Yeah,” Kim agreed again and sighed. “I just don't know what to do. This whole thing is just so overwhelming. I just…I want my child to be born and grow up safely. I know I can assure that, but Shego….I don't know.”

“You could always fight for sole custody. Given your past, and especially Shego's I'm sure the courts would be on your side,” Ron suggested.

“I probably could, but it doesn't seem right. The baby's Shego's as much as mine and I don't want to take it away from her. She just-”

S: “Is there an antidote for minor apostrophe poisoning?”

“Hey Kim,” a new voice spoke from behind her.

K: “Hey, one of those wasn't an apostrophe. A colon got loose.”

Kim's body stiffened at the sound of the voice and she slowly turned around in her chair to come face-to-face with her other arch rival, Bonnie Rockwaller. The devilish look on the brunette's face

K: “Ghaa! More Satan Worship!”

told Kim that the girl was ready to lay into her with her latest dig, something she was definitely not in the mood for.

“Not now Bonnie,” she growled, turning back around.

“I just wanted to say how sorry I was for missing you at the mall on Saturday,” Bonnie started, voice dripping with malicious glee.

Uh no, Kim thought in horrified realization.

S: (as Kim) “I'm just a cartoon! Oh, no!”

“But I did manage to catch you there with Monique and some other woman. Who I believe you're shopping for clothes for. I couldn't really tell over all the fighting you're doing. Though if you asked me it looked more like a lover's spat. So what happened? Stoppable mess you up so bad that you just gave up on men all together? Is little Ms. Perfect playing for the other team now? And what about the baby clothes? Is there something else you're hiding?”

K: “Bonnie, um, you've got a little malicious glee on your chin, there…”

Half way through, Kim had closed her eyes and tried her best to tone the obnoxious girl out. But her friends could tell by the way she was shaking with anger and gripping the table hard enough to break it or her fingers, it wasn't working. They tried to intervene to keep the scene from turning ugly, but it was too late.

S: “5… 4…”

“Bonnie, shut up,” Kim said in a soft, dangerous tone.

S: “3… 2…”

“What was that?” Bonnie continued on, oblivious to the situation. “Didn't quite catch that K.”

S: “1… blast off!”

”I said SHUT UP!” she shouted, jumping out of the chair and getting right in the brunette's face. “I'm tired of hearing this! In fact, EVERYONE'S tired of hearing this! I've never understood what you're problem with me is and to be honest I don't care. Neither does anyone else if you haven't noticed. Ever since the dance last year when you tried to make fun of Ron and I for finally becoming a couple. Or do you not remember how everyone basically shunned you? How they've BEEN shunning you ever since we got back! Even when we broke up and you tried again to rally people to your cause you failed. You want to know why? Because everyone's just sick of it! They finally realized that this attitude of yours doesn't make you `cool’ or `popular’ it just makes you mean spirited and petty. Not to mention pathetic. And that's what you are Bonnie, you're just pathetic.”

S: “Gabby Johnson's right!”

K: “Yeah! And what about Scarecrow's brain?”

Instead of sniping back with a witty reply or cutting remark, Bonnie instead stood there in silence with her mouth hanging up and eyes as big as saucers. This sentiment, and in some cases expression, was shared by the rest of the cafeteria as they simply stared upon the red headed girl dumbfounded. It was widely known that she could be quick to anger, she was a redhead after all, but this outburst stunned them all.

The person feeling the most effect from it was of course Bonnie. She tried several attempts at a comeback, but her mouth just flapped up and down uselessly. This was not the way it was suppose to go. She would make some snide remark, Kim would make one back, they would continued for a bit and then go their separate ways. But the…attack Kim just laid on her was too much. There was no way she could respond to it. Mostly because she knew it was true. Ever since the dance last year, she became the school's new pariah. Everyone turned against her, her friends, the cheer squad, even the freshmen knew to avoid her. Where she was once one of the most popular girls in school, now she was part of its outcasts. Even they wouldn't take her in after the way she treated them for years on end. So, knowing she had been beaten, Bonnie simply sighed and slumped her shoulders as she walked off and found an open, and empty, table.

S: “And there she lives to this very day!”

Kim continued to stare at Bonnie until she sat down, and then finally turned back to her own table, picked up the chair and sat down once again. When she did, she found Ron, Monique, and Rufus still giving her the wide eyed silent treatment.

“What!” she snapped.

They looked at each other for a second, as it silently decided who should be the one to talk to her. Not surprisingly it was Ron.

K: (as Ron) “Damn `rock, paper, scissors'…!”

He sighed and tried to brace himself for the worst.

S: “Like that time Barkin caught him alone in the gym…”

K: “EWWW!”

“Uh…Kim, don't you think that was a little much? I mean I know Bonnie's a pain and all, but…” he stated gently.

“She asked for it,” Kim replied. “Besides I have enough to worry about right now without having to put up with Bonnie being…well Bonnie.”

“I know that, but the way you handled it was kinda…”

“Kinda what?”

“Shego-like?” he offered, ducking his head down a bit.

“Uh huh, uh huh, Shego,” Rufus agreed.

K: (as Rufus) “u'hu! u'hu! bich!”

This time it was Kim's turn to stare in open mouthed shock. She obviously didn't think about it at the time but looking back now, the reaction did seem more along the lines of how Shego would have handled it. This thought scared more than anything she could remember. She thought that being around Shego would be a positive influence on the pale skinned woman, but what if it was actually a negative influence on her? What if instead of calming down and asking more like Kim, Kim actually started acting more like Shego? She shook her head violently at the idea.

“No, that won't happen,” she muttered.

“What won't happen?” Monique asked, looking very concerned at this point.

S: “Bill Gates ever seeing the inside of prison… never gonna happen.”

It was then that Kim realized she said the last statement out loud and suddenly felt embarrassed. She looked at her two friends again and tried to shrug it off as discretely as she could.

“It's nothing, really. I can handle it,” she told them.

Again Ron and Monique looked at each other concerned expressions.

---

Shego stood before a full length mirror in her room in the Possible household.

K: “Full-length and extra wide!”

S: “Damn it! I'm athletic! Athletes have muscular thighs! I am NOT fat!”

It was one of the things she had acquired during her outing with Kim and her friend this weekend. Other items included a new stereo, a couple CDs and DVDs and a few other things she insisted she needed. Of course a lot of them she really didn't need but it was fun to drag Kimmie around the mall. At least when she allowed herself to be dragged around, when she didn't…well Shego sincerely wished she was still in a condition for a physical fight.

Still living with the Possibles wasn't all that bad. Especially at times like these when she had the house all to herself.

S: “I know where all the porn is!”

She was actually amazed at how trusting the family could be just based on Kim's word. Hell, Kim trusting her was a big shock in itself. She was still a wanted criminal and had attacked the girl many times. For all the cheerleader knew she could set a trap up for her in her very own home. Or she could just steal whatever she wanted and take off like that. Of course the family didn't really have anything worth stealing and she had no place to go. Plus there was a part of her that didn't want to betray Kim's trust. It had been a long time since anyone trusted her, let alone a former enemy, and it felt…odd, but in a good way.

K: “Like when you drink too much cold medicine.”

Unfortunately, it also left her very little to do during the day when everyone else was gone. There was usually nothing go on TV during the middle of the day and she was still trying to figure out what she could eat without immediately throwing up afterwards. So she opted to finally do what she really didn't want to; put away her trademark green and black cat suit. She stood before the full length mirror placed in the left corner of the room with the suit held in front of her. She sighed at how good it looked against her body at the moment, but knew those days were quickly coming to an end. Slowly, she moved it aside and studied her almost bare body.

S: “Kimmie, stop drooling.”

She was clad only in a lacy bra and matching panties that she bough during her recent outing and also thought she looked good in.

S: “Ah, geez… you're making a mess all over yourself!”

This two would change soon enough. That though drew her to the source of her worrying; her stomach. Right now it was taunt and lean, a prefect athletic build. But in a few months it would start to bulge out and expand as the life she carried inside her grew. This too felt odd as she had always gone to great lengths to keep her body in top shape. She just couldn't picture herself with a huge gut, even if it wasn't due to fat. It would still slow her down and keep her from doing anything really.

S: “Hey! Hey! Can we get a mop or something? And maybe a change of clothes for Princess? Anybody…?”

As much as she did like to lie around and take it easy, she didn't like the idea of not being able to fight; not being able to protect herself. She especially didn't like the idea of having to depend on others for help in doing simple tasks. She hated being helpless and that's essentially what she would be. Adding to all that worry was the fact that she had no idea how exactly to raise a child. Kim might have offered to help, but she probably didn't any more of a clue than Shego. Maybe it was for the best she stay there for awhile after all. At the very least she could ask Kim's parents for advice in raising a child. Though that would require spending more time with them and from what she gathered already they were…slightly odd. At least her father was, her mother seemed pretty normal.

S: “Mmmmmmmmm…”

K: “What?”

S: “Nothing… just picturing a Kimmie-Shego-Anne sandwich.”

K: “Ghaa!”

Plus she's gone through this three times before so I'm sure she could help some, Shego thought. She then placed a hand over her stomach, something she seemed to be doing a lot lately. Not even born yet and you're already giving me trouble. Hope this isn't going to be a pattern later on in life. Course knowing how I was as a kid I wouldn't be surprised. Look I'll make you a deal, if you promise not to act up too much I promise not to be all overly protective and strict mom. I'm sure Kim will fill that role anyway, so I'll be the fun mom who lets you get away with just a little bit more. Sound good?

Of course she received no reply and shook her head in confusion of her own actions. She figured it was just her hormones starting to go all wonky on her.

K: “Hm, women.”

S: “Yep.”

She refocused her attention on the suit in her hand and continued with what she originally had planed. She walked over to the bed, placed the outfit next to an open suitcase and then carefully folded it up. She stowed it in the large, steel suitcase next to where she already laid out the gloves, boots and ankle pouch, then closed it and slid it underneath the bed. She had been so careful because she figured this would be her last suit in a long time and she didn't want to damage it in any way because she swore to herself that someday she would wear it again. She didn't know when or in what capacity but she would wear it again. Someday.

---

Kim smiled as she entered the house. It always felt good to come back home after a mission.

K: “When it's time to relax… one beer stands clear…”

S: “Princess, the Product Placement folks are on the phone. Something about a violation…”

Mostly because it felt good to make it home from a mission, but being home also made her feel safe; relaxed. If anything it made it seem like all the amazing things she did was part of a daily routine. Get up, get dressed, go to school, stop some crazy madman's latest take over the world scheme, come home and having dinner with the family, go to bed and repeat the next day. When she thought about it that way it was actually kind humbling. This is good because it kept her from getting a swelled head, unlike a certain someone she knew.

But she would worry about that later. Right now she planed to enjoy the part of her “routine” where she spent time with her family. Particularly a nice home cooked meal. That is if Shego hadn't burned it all again.

That thought made her stop for a second. It had been two months now since she found out the ex-villain was carrying her child and invited her to life with her family.

S: “Next on Dr. Phil!”

K: “I told you, the explanation's getting shorter each time!”

As she figured, the first few weeks had been the most difficult. Shego fought her on almost every suggestion she made, their first trip the mall being the worst of it. From there their arguments consisted of what she could and couldn't do, why she had to go see Dr. Anderson

K & S: “That's me!”

Like she said she would, helping out around the house as much as she could, and oddly enough a rather intense fight about astronauts versus cavemen.

S: “Tom Baker was the best `Doctor Who’ ever!”

K: “Baker wanted to become a gay monk! This new Tennant guy is hot and Scottish!”

S: “I… you… that's not… GHAA!”

Out of that entire list, though, house chores seemed to be the biggest problem. For all the complaining Shego did about being bored through most of the day, she was still very adamant against helping out around the house. Something about not wanting to become “too domesticated” and “Donna Reed-like”.

K: “Hey, Donna Reed was teh hawt!”

Kim just figured it was another excuse for her to be lazy. Though the incident where she nearly burned the house down while trying to help her mother cook dinner might be proof she was telling the truth.

Fortunately, she calmed down in the following weeks to the point where she was bearable. They still had the actual verbal spat, which Kim figured would go on for a long time. There was a lot of animosity between the two of them that couldn't be swept neatly under a rug just because they were having a child together. They were trying to work it all out though, because they were having a child and the one thing they seemed to agree on was not to mess up its life too badly. Still, she knew a few arguments would pop up from time to time.

S: “I do wish that you'd learn to leave the seat down!”

But for the most part they actually seemed to get along fairly well considering their past relationship. Even more surprising, Shego seemed to, at the very least, be able to tolerate her family.

S: “… in their sleep, yeah… that's when I'll kill them…!”

She wasn't quite on friendly terms with them yet, especially her annoying brothers, but she at least she didn't think of them as “the enemy” anymore.

K: “More like `the enema’.”

Actually, she seemed to get along with her mother quite well, which was disturbing in its own right.

S: “Mmmmm…”

K: “Stop that RIGHT now!”

Again, she vanquished these thoughts and headed to her room for a quick change. As she headed back down the stairs and into the kitchen, she detected the unmistakable meaty scent of her mother's infamous “brain loaf” and she cringed just a bit. She knew it was the only way the Tweebs would eat it, but it still kind of freaked her out. Thankfully she heard the knocking sound of a metal hitting wood which meant her mother was most likely busy cutting vegetables for a salad or some other kind of alternative. She was grateful for that and readied herself to help her mother in the preparation if she needed it.

What was she not ready for was the sight that greeted her when she entered the kitchen. It was a sight that made her stop dead in her tracks and eyes go wide in disbelief. There were not many things in this world that scared her, but this was definitely one of them. There, in her very own kitchen, stood her mom side-by-side with Shego, cutting up vegetables and chatting it up like old friends. Now she had become used to having Shego in the house and did encourage her to get to know her family more, but…this was just wrong. Sick and wrong even. Something about the scene just gave off a very foreboding feel about it. One that only increased when they spotted her standing there and Shego looked at her with a devious grin.

“Well look who's finally back,” she practically purred.

“Oh hi Kimmie,” her mother half greeted.

“Yes, hello Kimmie,” Shego continued, the grin growing larger.

“Mom, what did you tell her?” Kim asked, immediately suspicious.

“I didn't tell her anything, we were just talking,” Mrs. Possible replied.

“About what?”

“Just a story about a certain future world saver who seemed to have a problem keeping her dress on when she was much younger,” Shego gushed, barely containing her laughter.

K & S: “Oh, yes, they call it the streak…!”

“MOM!” Kim shouted, her cheeks instantly going red.

“Oh what, it was cute,” Mrs. Possible said off handedly.

S: “… at first.”

It was at that point that Shego completely lost it and laughed uproariously. She laid down the knife she was holding and instead held the hand against her face as she leaned her head back. Kim gritted her teeth and balled her hands into fists as she fumed over the incident. She would like nothing more than to jump over the counter and drop kick Shego the face right now, but she knew she couldn't do that. Instead she took a deep calming breath and thought of another way she could retaliate.

“And what exactly are you doing in the kitchen Shego? I thought you're banned after that whole barbeque incident?” she said.

That got Shego's attention. She stopped laughing immediately and glared at the younger woman.

“Hey that was that one time! And I've been getting better since then!” she retorted.

“It's true, she has improved a bit,” Mrs. Possible spoke up.

“Whose side are you are mom?” Kim asked indignantly.

“I'm not on anyone's side; I'm just stating a fact. Plus I don't think you two should be fighting anyway. It can't be good for the baby.”

The statement made the two go silent, mostly because they knew she was right. They each muttered something of an apology before going about helping with dinner again. Shego returned to cutting vegetables while Kim started to set up the table. As she did so she cast a few glances Shego's way. The pale woman had given up her usual form fitting leotard two months ago and had taken to wearing regular clothes, though she kept with her black and green patterns. Currently she was wearing an overly large dark green sweater and a pair of black sweat pants. She started wearing baggy clothing recently because she was still self conscious about the fact that her pregnancy was starting to show.

K: “And also because it fit her new persona as a hip hop gangsta.”

Part of Kim could understand it; she knew that like her, Shego took pride in her lean, athletic appearance, but another part of her thought it was silly. There was no reason for her to be ashamed of carrying a new life even if it did expand you a bit. In fact, some cultures thought it made the woman even more attractive. Of course she knew Shego was too vain to admit that.

K: “You do look cute all pudgy like that.”

S: “You are so going to pay for the fat comments!”

Her head snapped up as that line of thought made her remember something that should have happened that day.

“So how did the appointment with Dr. Anderson go?” she asked.

S: “It was Ok, but do I really need a rectal exam just to get new glasses?”

“Pretty well,” Shego replied as she set the bowel of salad

K & S: “EWWW!”

on the table. “Basically told me the same thing about keeping my plasma blasts down until I have absolutely have to use them and that everything else looks pretty normal. Surprisingly.”

S: “So I guess that means I can drink and smoke all I want.”

“`Surprisingly’?”

“Oh come on, this whole thing came out from one of Drakken's experiments. I can't be the only one who thought something would go wrong.”

“Well…” Kim muttered, rubbing her left arm nervously.

K: “… with her right knee.”

“Anyway,” Shego spoke again, “The doc said she looks healthy enough at this stage.”

“`She’?”

S: “Ok, `it’, them. Happy?”

“Yeah,” the older woman replied, slightly annoyed at the repeated questions. “Again, can't be a surprise we're having a girl. Virus came from both our DNA and we're both girls.”

“True, but if it's a girl then that means-”

S: “She won't be able to drive?”

K: “She'll keep losing the remote?”

S: “Can't throw a baseball or run properly?”

“No pink.”

“Just a little, please?”

“I said no.”

“Well I-”

“Kim why don't you tell your father and the boys that dinner's ready?” Mrs. Possible asked, hoping to stop another fight.

Kim nodded and then went about finding the rest of her family. It didn't take them long to find their way to the kitchen table, especially her brothers, and they all quickly took their usual places with Shego sitting next to Kim. As with everything in the past too months it took them awhile to get use to the arrangement, but now it seemed to come naturally. Though Kim was still a little leery after a well placed plasma burst caused her jump and spill food all over herself. After the food was divided between them, they hesitated before they started eating. Shego looked around cautiously at them and wondered if they're going to start breaking out into prayer.

K: “I don't know that you can actually `break out in prayer'… break out in song, maybe…”

“What's everybody waiting on?” she whispered to Kim.

“You haven't figured that out yet?” Kim whispered back in surprise.

“Figured what out?”

As if in response to her question, a familiar blonde haired head appeared in the kitchen's doorway.

“Hola Possible family!” Ron greeted as he stepped fully into the room.

S: “Hey, it's wacky Cousin Hola Possible, from Buenos Aires!”

“Of course,” Shego muttered.

“Shego,” he said curtly when he noticed her.

“Here again Stoppable? Don't you have your own family to annoy?”

“Yes, but I also have an open invitation

S: “… and an open bar…”

to be here whenever I want. And it just so happens that my mom's cooking can't match Mrs. Dr. P's cooking.”

“Oh Ron please,” Mrs. Possible said, feeling somewhat embarrassed. “I'm sure you mother's cooking isn't that bad. I mean you cook well enough, you've helped out here a few times.”

“Yeah I know, but for some reason mom doesn't like me cooking at home,” Ron explain as he took the open chair on the other side of Kim. “I think she's jealous.”

K: (as Ron) “That bitch!”

“So let's see, you can't keep a girlfriend, you know how to cook, and you have a very phallic pet,” Shego remarked, ticking each item off on a finger. “Yeah I think I'm seeing a pattern developing here.”

“Hey!” Ron shouted as Rufus climbed out of his pocket.

“Yeah, hey!” the small naked animal shouted as well.

S: (as Ron) “Will you please stop making fun of me while I'm trying to style your hair? Keep it up and I'll NOT tell you what your colors are!”

Shego chuckled at her own joke, but that was stopped by a quick poke in the ribs by Kim. She glared at the younger woman but did nothing else. The Possible parents breathed a sigh of relief that the argument hadn't turned into something larger and after serving up a plate for Ron they all began to eat. The room was soon filled with the clanging of metal against porcelain plates and the idle chatter of small talk centering on everyone's day.

“Oh yeah!” Ron spoke up. “That baby thing was today, right? How'd that go?”

“Pretty good from what I hear,” Kim answered, casting a glance at Shego. “The baby's completely healthy.”

S: “For a phreak!”

“Booyah! Thing's going good for the Possible baby.”

“You do remember that I'm actually having the baby, right?” Shego asked sardonically.

“Yeah but I didn't think I had to worry about you cause…you know, you're tough,” Ron defended himself.

K: “Yeah, you're all gristle and your skin's like leather…”

“That's true,” she said then looked over at Mrs. Possible. “Since we're on the subject of the hospital, what's with that Dr. Cox guy?”

K: “'Cox’? Let me guess, he helps guys with erectile dysfunction, right?”

S: “No points for that one, it was too easy.”

“Perry? He's just…” Mrs. Possible started to reply then stop when she noticed Jim and Tim were listening. “Well I better not say with the boys here.”

“Awww,” they whined.

“Maybe but I still think he's a-”

She stopped suddenly and held a hand over her mouth as her cheeks ballooned up. Without another word she jumped up from the seat and headed in the direction of the bathroom.

K: “… to take a massive.”

Everyone but Ron seemed unfazed by the event.

“Well that rude,” he muttered.

S: “That rude… what?”

“Don't worry about that, it's just the baby acting up,” Mrs. Possible said off handedly. “I went through the same thing when I was pregnant with Kimmie. Couldn't keep anything down, she was so picky.”

“Mom please!” Kim pleaded. “Can you limit it to just one embarrassing story a day?”

K: “Yes, please save your `amusing vomit story’ for some other occasion!”

When Ron quirked an eyebrow at the comment, she just gave him a look that told him to drop the topic or else. He complied and the group went back to their meals. After a little while, Shego walked back into the kitchen and after making a muttered, almost incomprehensible apology

S: “Those words could be used to describe just about anything performed by Bob Dylan.”

walked over to the refrigerator and began pulling out a few items before she moved to the pantry for two slices of bread. They all watched as she put together a sandwich that was simply horrifying.

“Is that…”

K: “Spam?”

Kim started, not sure if she could finish the sentence without having to run to the bathroom herself.

“Yep, mayonnaise, pickles, ham and peanut butter and jelly,” Shego finished, holding up the sandwich in question and defending herself by simply saying, “Cravings.”

K: “Ok, Spam doesn't sound so bad, now.”

“Coool,” Jim and Tim said together.

“We have to try one!” Jim said enthusiastically.

“Yeah!” Tim agreed.

“Not until you finished your dinner,” Mrs. Possible reprimanded. “And you're cleaning any mess you make.”

S: (as Mrs.Dr.P) “You little shits!”

This seemed to dissuade the boys from trying the new confectionary concoction they just learned about. Shego just shrugged it all off and walked out into the living room to finish her sandwich in front of the TV. Once the slight wave of nausea past, the Possibles and Ron continued on with their own meals, eating and chatting about the day. When dinner was over, Kim helped to clear then table and put the dishes in the washer before she walked into the living room to check on Shego. She found her just finishing the last bits of her sandwich and after scrunching her face a bit, Kim sat down next to her.

“Feeling better?” she asked.

“Eh, a little. Don't think I'll ever get use to these weird cravings though,” Shego replied, her face twisted a bit in disgust.

“Yeah…try not talk about that too much. It…just don't talk about it.”

Shego nodded in agreement and the two sat in silence for a moment as they watched the TV.

“So…mom let you back into the kitchen, huh?” Kim asked slyly.

“Look I told you it was just that one time! I've figured out how to cook things without setting the house on fire!” Shego erupted and then folded her arms over her chest and slumped a bit.

“Besides, Ann's only letting me chop vegetables and stuff now anyway.”

K: “She slices, she dices… just look at that tomato!”

Kim chuckled a bit at that but stopped when something Shego said hit her hard.

K: “Ow! Something that Shego just said hit me! Hard!”

“Wait. `Ann’? You're calling my mom `Ann’ now?” she asked, incredulously.

S: “Well, I was going to tell you anyway… I'm dating your mom. She's hawt!”

“That's her name isn't it?” Shego replied.

S: “It's better than `Hoe-bag'…”

K: “Hey!”

“Yeah but…it's just…what happened to the whole `I don't think the family thing is for me Kimmie’?” the red head asked, doing her best impression of the other woman.

She just shrugged. “Your family's not as irritating as mine. Well except for your brothers. Guess I'm just finally starting to get use to it here. Although I'm still never partaking in `Family Game Night’,” she said sternly then gave a shudder.

S: “And definitely no more `Family Strip Poker Night’, either!”

“Fair enough. Just as long as you try to be nicer to Ron,” Kim asked sincerely.

“I'm making no promises.”

Kim sighed and leaned against the back of the couch. She supposed for now it was the best reply she was going to get. She just wish she knew how to get the two to find some common ground outside of her. That way maybe she could build it up into at the very least a mutual understanding between the two of them so she wouldn't have to worry about her baby being pulled into some kind of weird tug-of-war.

K: “Well, sharpen my sword and call me `Solomon'!”

As if she wasn't going to have enough to worry about what with having two mothers and all.

S: “Next on Donahue!”

“Hey KP, it's nine o'clock, we need to switch it to-” Ron exclaimed as he came marching into the room, but stopped when he spotted Shego already holding the remote. “Alright lady, hand over the remote. I need to turn the channel.”

S: “I just know that `DEBS’ is on, somewhere… I can smell it…”

Shego snorted. “So you can watch stupid wrestling or something? Think again Stoppable. Besides, who's the one that actually lives here?”

K: “Oh, yeah, right down the hall from `Kigo Central'!”

S: “Thank you, Princess…”

“And who's the one that's known Kim since Pre-K? And not try to kill her all the time. AND was dating her for awhile?”

K: “You know, Ron does have a good point…”

S: “Huh? No! Pumpkin, only I love you! ME!”

“Ron I really don't think that's-” Kim tried to say.

“Who's the one having her baby?” Shego countered.

K: “True, there is that…”

S: “See? SEE? That's right… it's just the two of us, baby!”

“Shego really that's-”

“Who's the one that helped her fight you for all those years?” Ron sneered.

K: “Yep, Ron's right about everything.”

S: “WHAT?”

K: “Kidding! You need to relax more…”

“Oh is that's what you were doing? I thought you're just running around and screaming like an idiot.”

“Please you guys,” Kim tried again.

“Yeah well at least I'm not-”

Whatever Ron was going to say was cut off by the announcer on the TV.

“It's time for American Starmaker!”

K: (as Simon Cowell) “Just dreadful, absolutely dreadful…”

“Oh good, this is what I wanted to see,” he said, seeming to forget all about his argument and sat next to a relieved Kim.

As the three stared at the TV it took a moment for the situation to really sink it.

“Wait a minute, you watch this!” both Ron and Shego shouted in surprise, pointing fingers at the other.

“Well yeah,” Ron replied. “Didn't you see me almost win that one time?”

“Ah doy, I was there,” Shego remarked. “Besides your competition for the night was Drakken. Not really much to go up against.”

“Well still, I was better.”

“Whatever,” she rolled her eyes. “Just be quiet, it's starting.”

Much to Kim's surprise, and again relief, Ron did what he was told and they watched the show in relative silence. A smile slowly worked it way over Kim's mouth at the scene of Ron and Shego actually sitting next to each other without trying to attack each other. It looked like she found their common ground after all. It probably wasn't the best of common grounds, but at least it was a starting point.

---

Later in the evening, Kim sat alone in her room and tapped the end of her pencil impatiently on her desk.

K: “Damn you, Mr. Pencil… SAY SOMETHING!”

The one thing she always hated about having a mission during the week was the fact that she usually had to end up doing her homework late at night. That was exactly what she was doing at the moment and her sleep deprived mind was having a hard time coming up with the answer to the problem on the page. She debated just leaving it for tomorrow morning, but that meant she'd have to get up earlier to finish it and she wanted, and needed, all the sleep she could get.

When the familiar tone of the Kimmunicator reached her ears she wasn't sure whether to be happy or resentful. Seeing it as a way to get out of homework regardless she reached over and picked up the device, turning it on as she did so.

“What's the sitch Wade?” she asked.

“You got PM on your site,” the boy genius replied.

S: “Prime Minister?”

K: “Prime Meridian?”

S: “Pre Menstrual?”

“Don't suppose it'll wait til morning will it?”

“It's from Dr. Director.”

That got Kim's full attention.

S: “… and gave her quite a stiffy.”

“Dr. Director herself and not one of their usual contacts?” she asked in disbelief.

“Yep. She says it's urgent and she needs to speak to your right away.”

K: “Hey, was that an eye-patch joke?”

S: (as Dr. Betty Director) “What? Who said that? Let me turn my head a little, and… oh, there you are!”

“And by right away you mean…”

“One of their jets is on its way to you right now.”

S: “Hey, Chad Pennington just drove up!”

She sighed. “Of course. Thanks for the heads up Wade.”

He nodded before ending the transmission. Kim stood up and stretched, and letting out a surprisingly long and loud

K: “Belch?”

yawn.

K: “…oh…”

She recovered quickly then went about putting on her mission clothes just in case. She carefully made her way downstairs and out the front door so as not to wake anyone else in house. No sooner had she stepped onto the lawn than a Global Justice personal jet set down silently in the street. She smiled at the timing and then stepped up into the ship via the extended stairs. The smile quickly disappeared though when she came face-to-face with her least favorite GJ agent.

“Will,” she half greeted.

“Kimberly,” Will Du replied from his seat.

“Don't suppose you can tell me what this is about?” she asked as she took the seat across from his.

“Unfortunately no. Dr. Director told me very little just that I should be here to meet you since I am a familiar face to you.”

K: “Well, another familiar face would have been Hitler, so I don't believe that your reasoning stands up to scrutiny.”

“Wonderful. I just hope this doesn't take to long, I really need to get my homework done and get some sleep.”

As usual with the highly trained, and smug, agent he didn't say anything in response. In fact, he said almost nothing for the entire time of their flight, which thankfully for Kim was short. After touching down in one of GJ's hidden hangers

S: “… damn, it took me forever to find these things!”

, she followed as he led her through the busy halls of Global Justice headquarters. The agents around them were much too busy to really acknowledge them and those who did only offered quick, polite nods. Will stopped in front of a set of large, metal double doors with a gold name plate reading “Dr. Director” one the right door. They slid open almost as soon as Kim stepped up to them and cast a glance at Will who simply motioned for her to go inside. She hesitated for a second but did as she was instructed and walked into the large, spacious room.

While most of the grey metal walls where bare, a small corner boasted an impressive array of medals and commendations for bravery. Near these sat a large wooden desk covered in files, pencils and an “In” box full of papers. Sitting behind it in a comfortable looking leather chair was the one eyed

K & S: “… one-horned, flying, purple, people-eating…”

, stern visage of Dr. Director.

“Kim Possible, it's good to see you again,” she greeted the teen hero formally.

K: “…or at least half of you… D'oh! Now you got me doing it!”

“Nice to see you too Dr. Director,” Kim replied as she stepped over to the desk and held out her hand.

The older brunette took the offered hand in her own and after a quick shake told Kim to sit down in the smaller, less comfortable seat in front of her desk. Again, the red head did so and stared at Dr. Director in anticipation.

“So what's up?” she asked, forgoing her usual catchphrase out of respect.

“There's something I need to ask you,” Dr. Director replied.

“Oh? What's that?”

S: “Paper or plastic? Boxers or briefs?”

K: “Pitching or catching?”

She answered by pressing a button and the wall behind her lighting up with pictures of Kim and Shego walking around the mall to buy clothes, going out for groceries, the few time Kim had convinced her to go to Bueno Nacho, and various other things they had down in the past two months. A sinking feeling suddenly overcame Kim and she started to fidget around nervously. She should have known that eventually GJ would come asking about this, but she had been far too busy to really think about it. Even if she had, she doubt she would feel any less anxious than she did right now.

“Mainly, I want to know why international hero Kim Possible is seen here out and about with international criminal Shego.

K: “And remember that your answer must be in the form of a question.”

A woman who's been as much as a threat to you as her former employer,” Dr. Director asked, leaning forward to place her hands on the desk and staring at Kim with her one good eye.

S: “… and rolling the other around on her desk.”

Kim squirmed even more as she tried to think what to tell the imitating woman.

K: “Dr. Director's a man, baby, yeah!”

She knew the truth was the best way to go but somehow telling it to the head of an international crime fighting organization just didn't seem like enough. She thought she should have some better explanation than that. In many ways it was like talking to Mr. Barkin when she was late for class.

S: “Now listen UP, people…!”

“Well?” Dr. Director asked again.

“It's like this,” Kim started, still feeling uneasy.

K: “She's got a great rack!”

S: “And don't forget abo…”

K: “Right, the booty. I remember…”

“About three months ago Drakken created a virus with mine and Shego's DNA that was suppose to get me pregnant, but ending up getting her pregnant instead. Since it was my baby she's carrying I convinced her to stay with my family until the baby comes to term. I'm hoping that even when the baby's born Shego will still stay there and, you know, turn over a new leaf.”

K: (as Dr. Director) “Oh. Well, sure, I guess that I can… WTF?!?”

“Really?” the other woman asked casually. “Well if that's the case I wish you luck.”

Kim blinked at the statement.

“That's…it? You don't have any more questions or not freaked out by it?”

S: (as Dr. Director) “Oh, I have MANY questions and am MAJORLY freaked out by it!”

“Kim when you've been in this business as long as I have it takes a lot more than that to freak you out,” she replied as she sat down. “Although I will admit I do have some concerns about this situation.”

“You're not the only one,” Kim sighed. “But am trying my best to keep Shego calm and I really do think this will change her. I mean she's already much more relaxed than she use to be.”

“While that is one of my concerns, my primary one is for the well being of your child.”

“That's nice but I don't think you have to worry, from what Shego said the doctor told her the baby is healthy.”

K: “For a phreak!”

“That's not what I meant,” Dr. Director said, slipping into her commander voice again.

“It's not?”

“Kim if we found out about this then you can others will as well. People tend to talk when two former enemies start acting nice towards each other. If word of Shego's condition spreads throughout the villain community…well I shudder to think of what might happen.”

K & D: “DUN DUN DUNNNnnnnn!”

Again Kim was shocked into silence.

K: “… she shocked me into silence…!”

S: “She shocked ME… into SILENCE!”

This too was something she knew she should have thought about but didn't get around to. The other woman was right though, if any of her villains found out about the child Shego was carrying they'd be relentless in their attacks. Even with her skills and Ron's help she didn't know if she could stop them all. What's worse is she know Shego would want to defense herself but couldn't without endangering the baby. This was a sitch she definitely wasn't ready for.

“I'm sorry to have worried you,” Dr. Director spoke, breaking Kim's thoughts. “But this is the reality you have to face.”

“I-I know. I just need time to plan some things. I'm sure Wade can come up with some things to keep an eye on Shego, but beyond that I don't know what to do right now. I…I need to sleep on it.”

K: (as Dr. Director) “Yes, but then you'll just wake up on top of another innocent super-powered villainess that you've knocked-up. You really must get another hobby!”

The head of Global Justice nodded. “You're right it is late, and I should have waited until morning to bring you here, I'm sorry. But as you said, now that you have it on your mind you can think about what you're doing to do. Rest assured that we here at Global Justice will do everything we can to make sure you baby is safe.”

“Thank you,” Kim said softly.

S: “What?”

K: “I SAID, THANK YOU!”

“After all the times you've saved the world it the least we can do. Now you should probably get going and get some sleep. It looks like you need it.”

Kim nodded slowly, then stood up and shook the woman's hand again. She then walked towards the double doors and was greeted by Will once more, who handed her off to another agent that would escort her home. Once they were out of sight, Will stepped into the office and up to the desk.

“I take it you were listening,” Dr. Director said matter -of-factly.

“Do you think she was telling the truth?” he asked.

“I think so yes. From what I've seen Kim's not a very good lair, it goes against who she is. And personally I would like to see her succeed at reforming Shego.”

K: “… or Regarding Henry.”

“Oh?”

“Think about it Will. We know what both those women are capable of.

S: “No kidding, if he's read the same fanfics I have…”

Now imagine they're fighting on the same side, our side. To top it off, they now have a child to raise which would make anyone fight harder than ever before.”

Will's eyes grew wide as he took in this information. Dr. Director caught this and smirked.

“Exactly my point,” she remarked, and then her face grew serious. “Unfortunately that also means that Kim won't have as much time to do the world saving bit. We're going to need to step it up on our end. How are things going with the Squad?”

“There are still a few things to be ironed out, but it's going well enough,” Will informed her. “Though I'm still not sure if it's a good idea to associate ourselves with those types.”

“Times change Will and we have to change with them if we want to keep the peace. What about the other girl?”

S: “What? Kimmie, you have ANOTHER girl?”

“We're keeping taps on her, but to be completely honest I don't think she's anywhere near Kim's level.”

Dr. Director smirked again. “I'd be careful Will, the sounded dangerously like a compliment.”

Agent Du balked at the remarked which caused his boss to give a small chuckle.

“There's a new life about to be brought into this world Will, let's do out best to make it a safe place for it.”

---

Kim tried to stifle a yawn as she walked through the door of her house but failed miserably. As she stumbled through the living room she noticed the TV was on again with the volume turned down low.

K: “… damn poltergeists!”

When she went to investigate she found Shego laying on the couch with the remote still clutched in the hand laying on the floor. She couldn't help but smile as she looked at the sleeping woman, her left hand resting protectively over the small bulge in her stomach. She watched the lights from the TV flicker over Shego's pale green skin, creating strange patterns as it did so.

S: “… strange patterns… weird patterns…”

In her sleep, Shego looked so peaceful that it was hard to belief she was the same person that helped Dr. Drakken place her in all those over elaborate death traps. She looked vulnerable too, a word Kim knew she hated to be associated with. But those were the only thing she could think of to describe her at this moment; peaceful, vulnerable and glowing.

S: “…zzzzZZZZZZZ… SNORT… gurgle… ZZZZZZ… snort… ZZZZZZZZ…”

Not just the light from the TV or in the way of her plasma powers, but an inner glow that seemed to come along with being pregnant. At least that's what she thought it was. Either way, it was nice to see and actually seemed to make her appear more beautiful.

Wait a minute, Kim thought. Did I really just use the world “beautiful” in regards to Shego? Dr. Director was right. I do need sleep.

K: “I really meant, `She iz the HAWT!”

She was just about to leave when she looked down at the sleeping Shego again, focusing mostly on her left hand and more importantly what was under it. She remembered the other thing the eye patched woman said to her and a cold chill ran down her spine. Eventually her enemies would find out and she would have not just the fight of her life on her hands, but also the lives of her baby and Shego. She sighed before she reached out and gently laid a hand over Shego's.

I don't know what's going to happen when this gets out, but I promise you I'll protect you. She gave the hand and the bulge a gentle squeeze.

K: “HONK!”

S: “AWOOOOGA!”

Both of you.

To Be Continued…

---

S: “What the Hell?”

“The film's stopped, Shego, you don't have to talk like that anymore.” Kim rolled her eyes and stifled a giggle.

The taller woman blushed the color of a deep bruise and covered her eyes against the sudden glare; she looked over to see Kim squinting and rubbing her face. The screen before them had gone blank and the house lights were coming up, revealing the details of the darkened theater that they had so hurriedly stumbled into a while ago. There were few seats, just seven or eight, and the images seemed to be projected from an aperture above and over their heads from the rear wall. There was also another of the `Cam-Bot’ devices hovering at the back of the room, or the original one had followed them from the control room where they had first materialized.

“What's going on, Shegie?” Kim was stretching and squirming in her seat.

“I dunno, Pumpkin. Let's take advantage of this break to stretch our legs and maybe locate the crapper.”

“Is it the `Return of Captain Smallbladder’?”

“In spades. You know that I can't hold it as long as you can!”

Together they stood and walked up the short incline towards the rear doors of the tiny theater. The `Cam-Bot followed, lending credence that there was just the one machine. Down the same hallway and through the sequence of oddly configured doors they walked, eventually returning to the hemispherical room with its hexagonal wall plates. The room was exactly as they had left it, with the contents of the storage lockers strewn across half of the available floor space. The `hexfield’ view screen was deactivated and the iris was constricted. Shego noticed another hatchway, much smaller than the larger `G’ hatch leading back to the theater, on the opposite wall.

“Kimmie, I've got to find the bathroom. Will you be Ok here, or do you want to come with me?”

“I'll be fine.” The petite redhead looked down at the junk near her feet. “I think I'll clean up a little.” She stuck out her tongue in answer to Shego's smirk as the green and black clad woman sauntered off.

The bathroom was easy enough to locate and she was soon on her way back to the central control room. Taking a minute to inspect the ship, the remainder of this so-called `Satellite of Love’ seemed to be split between habitation and life support, with both areas ankle-deep in toys, magazines, discarded food containers and an enormous crate with the word `Hamdingers’ stenciled across the side. This she found in what might have been a bay to the outer void of space, but there were no vehicles to be found. Sorry that they wouldn't get to meet Mike Nelson or the `Bots in this artificial pocket-universe, Shego returned to the control room.

Kimmie was setting up a game of `Rock `Em, Sock `Em Robots™’.

“Where in the world did you find that?”

“Under some of the stuff I pulled out of that locker over there.” She pointed. “There's all sorts of stuff in this place.” She bent over the toy and Shego noticed that the traditional red and blue opponents had been heavily modified.

“Um, Princess, why do the robots look like me and you?”

“Well, I'm glad that you asked.” Kim stood to give Shego a better look at the robots, their usual blocky bodies streamlined and reshaped to resemble the svelte and voluptuous forms of the two girls. “I was thinking about this movie and how our lives would be different if you, or I, got pregnant.”

“Uh, huh. Aside from the baby, what do you mean?”

“Well, for one thing, we wouldn't be able to spar like we do… there couldn't be any rough-housing during the pregnancy and then not for several more weeks after delivery while you recuperate!”

“And this…” Shego pointed to the toy doubtfully. “This is your solution?”

“Sure! Give it a try!” Kim placed her hands around the control for the slender robot with the blue and white outfit and flippy red hair, while Shego moved around to grip the control for the green and black uniformed woman with long black hair and more pronounced curves. Kim counted down to the start of their match. “Ready? Set? Go!”

Clumsily at first from years of not having played, each woman quickly relearned the maneuvers necessary to thrust and jab and eventually knock the opponent's block off. To her credit, Shego won the first round, giggling when she beat Kim. The laughter turned to sulking when Kim won two out of three. Shego was demanding a rematch when she noticed something.

“Kimmie, did I just hear my robot say something?”

“Oh! I forgot to turn up the volume.” She fiddled with the toy. “When I retooled the robots to look like us, I added a `Kigo Trash Talk’ feature.”

“What?”

“Here, listen…” The redhead slid her little `Kim-bot’ close to the idle `Shego-tomaton’.

`hey-princess-do-you-like-what-you-see’

`I-don't-like-girls-I-like-ron’

`right-then-the-handcuffs-are-just-for-show-huh’

`you-are-a-villain-but-you-make-me-feel-all-squishy’

“Now, check this out…”

Kim pressed a switch that Shego hadn't noticed before. The robots continued to… perform… but there was no sparing and no talking either. There were a few moans, though.

“This other feature would normally be controlled by the players, also, but I've set it to run the special `get your freak on’ option while in demo-mode. I don't expect that either of us would have any trouble doing, uh, this while pregnant, but I wanted to make the game as realistic as possible!”

“Uh… Kimmie? You're not just wack, you're wiggidy-wack.”

Kim's riposte was thwarted by the large red button on the central console, which began to flash brightly in time with a blaring siren deafening them from overhead.

“Uh, oh…”

“We have…”

“MOVIE SIGN!” They left the toy behind to get its freak on as they ran back through the large `G’ hatchway and down the hallway towards the theater.

---

Chapter Four: Here Comes Trouble…

The Los Demonios Sports Museum is usually a very active place.

K: “The where?”

S: “Beats me, maybe it's near New Jersey.”

People come from miles around to gaze the many exhibits of famous sports equipment, photos of history making plays and life like mannequins of Hall of Famers. Normally fathers take their sons to share in a bonding experience over all the great sports moments which play on TVs placed throughout the building. There are even occasions when said Hall of Famers drop by for autograph sessions and chat with the fans.

S: “Excuse me, but where is the Liberace exhibit?”

K: “I'm sorry, Ma'am, but I believe that you're looking for the Hall of Flamers. It's just down the block.”

Of course, all of this takes place in the day while the museum is open. Late at night the halls are devoid of any people save for the lowly night guards who roam the darkened halls looking for any signs of trouble. Tonight, they were unfortunate enough to find some. At first they simply thought one of the displays from the golf section had been knocked over, but they were quickly proven wrong when it dispelled a gas that knocked them out cold.

K: “POOOOT!”

Now, a lone figure made its way around the glass cases in said golfing section, looking for one display in particular. When he found object of his quest he paused and a smile spread across his red bearded face in evil glee.

“Aahh, here we are,” the figure said in a thick, Scottish accent. “The golf clubs of ol’ Rannulph Junuh, one of the best golfers of his time. Looks like you don't got an angel looking after your clubs no do ya laddie?”

S: “Oy! Thet rabbit dinna belong tu yu!

K: “It dinna?”

S: “Nay, it dinna!”

“Well I wouldn't say that exactly,” a new voice spoke from the darkness.

The intruder whirled around, the golf bag slung of his shoulder clanging noisily as he did so.

K: “Och, mae balls!”

S: “Meaning your golf balls?”

K: “Oh, ay, thaem tu.”

He squinted his eyes into the darkened hallway to try and get a look at whomever it was that just spoke.

“Alright, come out whoever you are!” he demanded.

K: “… an taek a gander o’ mae balls!”

S: “Meaning your golf balls?”

K: “Oh, ay, thaem tu.”

“Who me?” the voice spoke again.

This time the speaker stepped out into the pale moonlight provided by the skylight above them to reveal himself fully. He was a boy about eighteen or so dressed in a simple red T-shirt and faded loose fit jeans with a brown, suede jacket over the shirt. His brown eyes sparkled with confidence and a bit of mischief as he looked back at the Scottish man.

“Guess I should introduce myself, huh? My name's Dave and you're Duff Killigan, right?”

“Aye,” the villain responded. “And just what are you doing here, `Dave’?”

S: “Open the pod bay doors, Hal!”

“Well at the moment I'm talking to you and hoping to convince you to just give up whatever it is you're here to do and just walk away. Otherwise things are gonna have to get ugly.”

K: “Well, uglier, anyway…”

“Really? And are you planning on taking me on all by yourself?”

“Me? No, I don't do a lot of the fighting. Only a couple of punches here and there. She on the other hand…”

At the mention of a “she” Killigan's body tensed. The only “she” do gooder he knew about that would be willing to fight him was Kim Possible. But he had been so careful in being quiet and unseen. There wasn't even anyone with a computer around to send a message to her website. So how could she have known?

S: (as Kim) “Hel-loo! I'd have a copy of the script! Hel-loo!”

Something else was off too. That boy he that came up to him wasn't Possible's usual sidekick, was it? He did have blonde hair, but it seemed a little darker than he remembered. Plus he was sure the buffoon's name wasn't Dave. It was…something. Started with an “R” he was sure of that.

S: “Retard?”

K: “Hey!”

Any further thoughts he had on the subject where lost when a sharp kick to his side sent him hurtling towards the floor. He groaned as he slid over the well waxed tile and once he came to a stop, picked himself up and shook his head clear.

“Alrighty now you ask for it lass! I'm gonna-”

K: “… whip oot mae balls!”

S: “Meaning your golf balls?”

K: “Oh, ay, thaem tu.”

he paused when he saw the girl standing over him.

Indeed it was not. Though the girl standing there looked to be about Kim's age she had dark, almost black looking hair instead of Kim's bright red. She also seemed to be a little more conservative with her attire as the navel blue top met with her matching khaki pants covering the midriff that Possible usually left bare. About the only things this girl had in come with Possible where the multi pouched belt she wore around her waist and the arrogant smirk on her face as a grabbling line retracted back into a device on her right forearm.

“You're na Kim Possible,” Killigan muttered. “Who are you?”

K: “An du ye wanna sae mae…”

S: “Balls! Yes, we know!”

K: “Wuhl, aye was gonna sae mae sighn dubh, but Ok, haers mae balls…”

“Jen Credible, the girl that's about to kick your skirt wearing butt,” the girl replied.

“First of all it's nodda skirt it's a kilt! Secondly, really what is this? Are you tryin’ ta be some Possible imitator or something?”

Jen balked at the comment and made a series of strangled gurgling sounds as she clenched and unclenched her hands.

“No!” she spat out venomously. “This is why I hate out-of-towners!

K: “Yeah, Jack Lemon was never funny.”

S: “Jack Lemon sucks lemons.”

Look, I know Kim set the standard and maybe she did inspire me, but she's not the only girl out there that can help people!”

“Uh Jen, you really think now is a good time to do this?” Dave asked cautiously.

“He started it!” she replied, pointing to the now standing Killigan.

“Yeah he shouldn't have done that I know but uh…” the dusty blond said, trying to draw his friend's attention to the matter at hand.

“No, no! Just once I would like to get recognized for my own merits instead of always being compared to Kim Possible.”

K: “And what's so wrong with that?”

“Jen seriously.”

S: “Wait, I thought she said her name was `Jen Credible’.”

K: “I am getting confused here!”

“What!”

His response was simply to point at the floor. When she followed his finger she saw a golf ball laying at their feet. While this itself wouldn't have been too odd given their surroundings, the fact that it stated glowing did pique her interest. It was then that she remembered exactly what Killigan's villain shtick was.

K & S: “Hit me with your villain shtick! Hit me, hit me, hit me!”

“Oh crap,” she muttered. “Jump!”

They did just that, each jumping in an opposite to avoid the well sized explosion. Dave was fortunate enough to land behind one of the display cases to use as cover, but Jen's lucky wasn't as good. She landed out in the open with only the Legends of Golf dummies to keep her safe. They proved their effectiveness when another golf ball turned them all into sawdust. Jen quickly found herself jumping, dodging, and flipping to avoid from joining the unfortunate displays. She was actually finding herself thankful that she had experience with attacks like this. Still…she couldn't keep up this pace forever.

“Dave? Little help here!” she called out as she rolled along the floor to avoid another explosion.

“Yeah sure just…give me a second here,” he muttered as he searched for something that might help.

K: (as Dave) “Crap, why couldn't he have broken into the `Legends of Firearms’ exhibit?”

Not surprisingly all he could find around him was golfing equipment. With a shrug he reached over and grabbed one of the clubs out of a dummy's hand.

“Jen, catch!” he shouted before he threw the piece of equipment.

She looked up in time to see the club flying towards her and catch it with her right hand. She blinked in confusion then cast him an odd look to which he merely shrugged back. Sighing, she held the club the handle and waited for the next attack. It didn't last long as a golf ball bounced to a stop next to her feet within seconds. She reared the club back and swung as hard as she could; hitting the small white orb and sending it flying back to its master. It exploded in midair and sent the demented Scotsman

S: “Really, is there any other kind? Hm?”

crashing to the ground. After he picked himself he gave her an impressed look.

“Tha's not bad lassie. You evah consider going pro?” he asked.

“Sorry golf's not really my thing. Besides, when I spend most of my time fighting wackos like you who has time to learn a sport?” she quipped.

“Too bad. I woulda invited ya to play on my private course. Once I tore down a few buildings first to make it of course. But if you don't wanna…”

He dropped another ball onto the floor and reared back to take a swing. When he tried to bring the club back down, however, he felt it stop with a slight jerk. He looked over his shoulder and found Dave standing there holding the other end. The boy smirked at him as Killigan tried to pull the club out of his hands. He growled when he found the job harder than he thought and placed both hands on his end and was about to pull at it with all his might when his legs suddenly gave out. As he crashed to the ground he caught a brief glimpse of Jen behind him in a baseball slide pose. She jumped up as he hit the ground and pulled out a small silver ball from her pouch on her belt. She causally dropped it and the instant it hit his chest it quickly unraveled into a metal rope that snaked around his body to tie up his arms and legs. He groaned as he flopped around like a fish out of water to free himself.

“Aw, I saw up his man dress,” Dave muttered and turned his head away.

“It's a kilt!” Killigan shouted.

S: “Aah! My eyes!”

K: “Ladies and gentlemen, Shego and I want to apologize to everyone for what has to be the nastiest `buffalo shot’ ever caught on film.”

S: “Kimmie, please kill me!”

“It's disturbing!” the blonde returned then looked to his partner. “You couldn't have done that earlier?”

“Well I was a little preoccupied avoiding all the exploding golf balls!” Jen snapped.

“Could have done it when we first got here and saved yourself the trouble.”

“Yeah…well…I got a bit distracted.”

“Cause he mentioned the…unmentionable name.”

“I didn't say people couldn't mention her just that I would like to stop being compared to her. Just cause we're both teen girls that save people mean we're exactly the same. She does her thing and I do my thing. Just would be nice if people would recognize my thing a little more is all.”

“Face it we work better in the low end of the saving people spectrum. All that glitz and publicity…well it's not for us.”

K: “Hey, Beavis, he said `spectrum'!”

S: “Heh… heh, heh!”

Jen crossed her arms and gave him a sour look.

“If you're joking then that's just cruel but if you're being sarcastic that's even worse,” she snipped.

“I'm just saying-”

His sentence went unfinished when he suddenly grabbed is head as if in pain. While the outside world only saw him holding the bridge of his nose and jerking about slightly, inside his mind a collage of pictures flashed by a blinding pace. He saw a run down warehouse in another city, a pale skinned woman with a small bulge in her stomach strapped down to a table and screaming while a younger red haired girl fought for life against grayish creatures. The very last image was of a demonic, yellow fact with blazing red serpentine eyes grinning evilly.

K: “Dave has a problem… a social problem. Dave likes to experiment with drugs instead of participating in a good after-school program.”

He let out a gasp when the vision finally past and took a few steady breaths as he rubbed his still throbbing head. When he finally forced his eyes open he saw Jen looking at him with a worried and expectant look.

“So? What did you see?” she asked.

He swallowed before speaking.

“You know that day you always knew would come?” he asked back.

S: “Thursday?”

“Yeah,” she answered vaguely. “Wait, do you mean…?”

“Yeah. Kim Possible's gonna need our help.”

---

“Shannon?”

“No. Kasy?”

K: “What? Like `… and the Sunshine Band’? That's a stupid name!”

S: “Kimmie! Ixnay! You'll piss off NoDrogs!”

“Try again. What about Samantha?”

“No. Brenda?”

“Nah. I still like Sheki.”

K: “And that one sounds like the kid's a stand-up comic! `Presenting, just late from the Catskills, funny-girl Sheki!’ Puh-lease!”

S: “I don't know this girl, she followed me in here! I love the names Kasy and Sheki! I lurve them!”

“We'll keep that one in the `maybe’ pile. How about Cassie?”

“How about we go back to the book instead of just randomly thinking up names?” Shego suggested as she opened Big Book of Baby Names. “Fine, `B’ will start with that. How about Bon-”

“Don't even think about finishing that name,” Kim snarled, venomously which surprised Shego. She then sighed when she realized what she was doing. “Sorry it's just…”

“That bitchy girl from school?” the older woman ventured.

“That bitchy girl from school,” Kim confirmed.

“Then we'll definitely not be going with that name. Still I'm sure there's something in here we can agree on.”

K: “Chunk Hugelarge?”

S: “Clint Beefpile?”

The teen hero nodded as she grabbed the other end of the book and started scanning through the list of names. Since Shego was entering the fourth month of her pregnancy, she figured it was best that they started to think of names for their little girl. Shego has been reluctant at first, saying it was too early to thinking about stuff like that, but after a bit of prodding she relented. Unfortunately, that had been the last thing she agreed to. Like most of their conversations, it started out well enough but quickly turned into a round of name calling and hair pulling. Luckily enough, they had both mellowed out sense the first naming session, but they were still couldn't find one they agreed on. Kim had suggested a way to combine their names to represent both parents while Shego really wanted something new. Kim's mother suggested using the baby name book but that only seemed to lead to more arguing. They had been through it at least twice already and still hadn't found one they both liked yet and it seemed the third time definitely wouldn't be the charm. Kim sighed as another page was turned.

K: “How about `the infant formerly known as fetus’?”

“Look, why don't we go back to trying to find good combinations of our names?” she asked.

“Sheki still sounds good to me,” Shego replied offhandedly.

K: “Mundus?”

S: “Skagit?”

K: “Brown Mackie?”

“I'm not saying it's a bad name it just…doesn't feel right. There has to be some combination that sounds good to both of us. What about…Kigo?”

S: “Well, I was actually thinking about `Pogo’, but `Kigo’ has a nice ring to it.”

Shego snickered. “Or we could go with the really obvious one Kimgo.”

“You don't have to be snotty about it,” Kim replied irritably as she folded her arms over her chest. “And I'd like to see you come up with one better.”

“Alright how about…” she closed her eyes for a moment. “Shem?”

“Shem? Well…it might work. What if we change the `E’ to an `I’?”

“Shim? You really want to call her Shim?”

S: “Boy, talk about `chicks with sticks'!”

K: “Ghaa!”

“Just toying around with it. What if we drop part of the `M’?”

Shego gave her a funny look to which Kim sighed.

“Make it an `N’. Shin. That has a nice ring to it. And I think it means new,” the red head replied and then started flipping through the name book only to come up empty. “Well I swear I heard that's what it meant somewhere. Either way I like it? What do you think?”

“Shin, eh? Well…it does sound kinda good. And if she anyone makes fun of her that's exactly where she can kick them.”

Kim chuckled at that. “Still I think it has a nice ring to it. Shin Possible.”

S: “How about `Big Daddy-Crack Peddling-Freak Machine’?”

“Whoa, whoa, whoa! When did we decide to give her your last name?”

“Well we can't really call her Shin Go now, can we?”

K: “… and so the infant was named `ShinGo, Daughter of Shego, Carrier of the Hefty Bosoms’.”

She paused to think about that for a moment. “That's not your real last name is it? I mean, I know you and your brothers all had a `Go’ suffix but…those are just the super hero names, right?”

Shego's eyes darted around nervously as she tried to think of a way out of the situation. Of course her name wasn't really “Shego” but if she told the younger woman her real name not only would there be the constant fear of her laughing at it, but then she might have to talk about the rest of her family and that was something she never liked doing.

“Come to think of it, you really haven't told me anything about your family since you've been here,” Kim spoke up.

Dammit! What is she physic too!

K: “Huh? `Physic’?”

S: “You got me, Princess.”

Shego cursed inwardly. Out loud she said, “Look, I told you my home life is really not something I like talking about. Maybe, maybe, one day I'll tell you but for now…I gotta have some secrets right?”

Kim gave her a cross look, but decided not to press the issue right now. She would learn all of the pale woman's secrets in time though, this she promised herself.

“Alright fine, but if we're going to play that game then we are going to use my last name,” she insisted.

“Fine,” Shego sighed then ran the name over in her head a few times. “Actually Shin Possible does sound pretty good.”

“So…are you admitting that I'm right?”

“Just this once. Don't let it go to your head.”

The teen hero faked innocence with a “What me?” expression that was quickly lost to a triumphant smirk. Shego rolled her eyes as she set aside the naming book and looked down at the bump in her stomach which now had a name. Shin Possible. She was actually giving birth to a Possible.

And here I thought this situation couldn't get any weirder, she mused. Just hope she has some of my features so it'll be obvious she's my baby too. Don't think it's too much to ask to have some say in all this, right? Wait. Who am I talking to?

K: “Hellooooooooo…!”

S: “Echoooooooooo…!”

“Are you alright?” Kim asked, suddenly concerned by the confused look on Shego's face.

“Yeah I'm fine just…rambling a bit in my head,” the green tinted woman replied.

S: “It's all the purple haze in my brain.”

“You don't seem like the rambling kind.”

“I also don't seem like the kind to give birth to a Possible baby but here we are.”

“Point. Still you seem kind of out of it.”

Shego sighed and leaned back into the couch. “I guess this whole thing is really starting