“So that’s the sitch.”
“All of it?”
“All of it.”
“Well, girlfriend. You’ve got quite the problem on your hands. A total MIITW.”
“A MIITW…?” Whispered, Kim Possible as she approached her locker with one of her closest friends at her side.
“Yes. MIITW! A major issue in the works,” Monique explained, as if it should have been simple. “Listen, Kim. I don’t know what you’re trying to do, but it’s a lot.”
“Which is why I was hoping you could help me out with some of the work load?”
“I don’t know. Taking care super villains and the heads of global organizations seems abit out of my area of experience.” Monique replied nervously, backing away from the pouting Kim Possible as she waved her hands around. “I don’t think I’m suited for the job. What about Ron?”
“Well, Ron is helping too but I need someone who is another female.”
“For what purpose is that!”
“Whoa! Why is everyone so perverted lately? I need you to help me in the clothing department. I can’t have them staying at my house with nothing but mom and dads old t-shirts to try on.”
“Oooh…okay,” Monique muttered, suspiciously. “Well, break is coming up so I suppose I can hang.”
“Great!”
“Well, it’s the weekend girl, Friday night awaits us. What’s on you’re schedule?
“Mission stuff…” Kim grumbled, “Mostly taking Dr. Director to the vet for the purpose we took Shego.”
“To cheat the system?”
“Right-o. After that I’ll have to tell this whole idea to the parents and tweebs. Oh man are they going to freak. Then if all goes well I was hoping you could take us on a tour of the wonderful world of Club Banana?”
“Why not, I ain’t got nothing else to do.” Monique grinned. “Meet you around six o’clock then?”
“Sure thing. And Monique?”
“Yeah?” Monique said, just as she had turned to wander down to her own locker and gather her things to leave.
“Thanks, you’re a real good friend. I knew I could count on you.”
“Anytime, girlfriend. Anytime.”
With a smile Kim turned back to her locker, gathering her last few books before taking a deep breath. With a nod to herself as she closed her locker she took to the hall of Middleton High.
Kim didn’t even notice the slight frown of a certain brown haired girl as she emerged from her hiding place.
Just what is that Possible up to?
Shego was bored. No, Shego was beyond bored.
“I am sooo bored…” She muttered, spying the stairway out of Kim’s room with desire and longing.
But Kimmie told me specifically not to cause any trouble what so ever. Shego thought, frowning. But then again…When was the last time I ever listened to anybody?
So with a cackle and a twirl she took the steps, silent as a predator after her prey.
And just who shall be my prey?
Passing the kitchen she would pause at the site of no Mama Possible, then again you aren’t suppose to bite the hand that feeds you, and she very much counted on getting fed from the elder Possible’s hand.
Walking into the center of the kicthen she’d cross her arms beneath her chest, dressed once more in one of those trademark blouses and for modesties sake she’d decided to sport another pair of Kimmie’s cargo pants. You know, just to cover up.
Should I happen to trip and fall with my butt up in the air. It could happen.
Now the only problem she was having was just where was everyone?
How am I suppose to release my animal like instincts when there’s no one here to practice on?
Except…
With a soft laugh she took to the wall, pressing against it as she took a deep breath and released, filling that dark center with the calm and inner peace of a master thief. One graceful foot was placed in front of the other, placing her just behind the wall that the massive Possible couch was settled against, and just who was on that couch when no one else in the house was home?
Hello washed up Global Justice leader…
Dr. Director sniffled, had been reduced to hiding out underneath a fort of blankets and pillows Mrs. Possible had been so kind as to give her for the night.
How could this have happened to me? She thought, scowling at her own naivety. How old am I? I shouldn’t be sitting here, moping around…but then what can I do?
She blew her nose against a piece of tissue, dwelling on the matters as she stared at the phone nearby. With Mamoru Scar in charge, and me unable to contact my Mother…
Though should a woman her age count on her ‘mommy’ as Shego put it, to bail her out of every jam?
No, she scowled, then I’d be just like Sheldon, always whining and moaning. ‘I’m the big brother, I’m the alpha, obey me!’ And yadda yadda…what was that?
“Death from above!”
Dr. Director screamed as she suddenly found herself flying from off the couch to lie beneath 160 pounds of green skinned muscle.
“Ugh!”
“And the mighty Sheeroo catches her unsuspecting prey…”
“If you do not remove yourself from off me this instant!”
“And just what are you going to do about it? Ms. Dr. Director…or should I be calling you Betty?”
“Aaaaargh!”
“What the! Oh wait a minute here! I was just kidding!”
“Prepare yourself!”
“Ah!”
As Kim Possible walked up the stairs to her house she swore she could hear the sounds of horse play on the other side. With a frown as she unleashed her key she would turn and unlock the door, pausing once again to listen to the screams and sounds of fighting within.
“Shego?” Kim whispered, before hearing a strangled warcry confirmed her suspicions.
“Shego!”
When Kim shoved open the door she was not prepared for what she saw.
“Oh see now you’ve done it, gone and given Kimmie a heart attack there.”
“Me?”
“Yes you.”
Kim Possible could only stand there, her mouth agape, her green eyes wide as she took in the site of the devastation and destruction that had become the living room. The coffee table had been flipped over and flung against some far wall, the couch had somehow tipped over. Paper cups, tissue, blankets, and pillows were everywhere. Burn marks from a certain someone’s plasma flame riddled the wall and floor almost like decoration, and there on the floor tangled amongst one another in torn and ripped clothed laid a heavy breathing Shego Go and Betty Director.
“Now Kimmie, it’s not what it looks like.”
No, the image of one of Shego’s hands wrapped around Betty’s throat and…was that a belt constraining and pinning down one of Shego’s arms? Nope, that was certainly not what it looked like.
“What the heck has been going on in here? Look at this mess! Oh! Mom and dad are gonna flip when they see this!”
“Ms. Possible looks quite upset…” Betty whispered, giving Shego a nervous glance as she wiggled about to remind the green skinned female that she was still very much on top of her.
“Oh yeah…” Of course, Shego couldn’t very well move with one of her hands pinned behind her back and the other still wrapped around the Director’s throat.
Kim dropped her bags, rushing out into the kitchen only to return with what looked like a rolled up newspaper.
“Now what does Princess think she’s going to do with that…”
“You guys…are in so much trouble!” Kim growled, slapping the end of the rolled up newspaper hard against her open palm. “Does this mean I’m going to have to get a…a pet sitter for the both of you when I leave in the mornings?”
“Hey now!”
“I’m quite capable of handling myself.” Betty muttered.
But their words were heard on deaf ears as the Possible advanced, standing behind the frozen pair before she swung that newspaper down right on Shego’s exposed backside.
“OW!”
Whap!
Betty, on the other hand, safe from the wrath of Kim for now, could only grin and laugh at the site of a scrambling Shego as she rose up off of her and ran for cover, covering her butt the entire way.
“What’s the big idea, Kimmie?”
“Bad, Shego! You’ll clean up all this mess!”
“I didn’t even start the fight, Princess–OW!”
By then Betty was sitting up, clutching the belt to her chest as she roared with laughter, that was, until Ms. Possible’s attention was upon her.
“Oh no, Ms. Possible. I’m a very grown woman and you will not be striking me with that…”
But much like what had happened before the very displeased Kim Possible did not seem to hear what Dr. Director was saying.
“I can’t adopt pets that don’t behave!”
“Now you wait a second there with that newspaper!”
“Wack her good, Princess!”
“You hush up before I come back and give you more!”
“Oh wow that spot on the wall is looking very interesting right about now…”
“Now, like I was saying…Huh?” Kim paused, newspaper raised in the air like a sword, ready to cut down with discipline and obedience. “Where she’d go?”
What is going on? First that now this? Betty sighed, shaking her head as she currently hid herself, blushing from shame and embarrassment.
“Me? Hiding from a small teenage woman? Granted she’s very skilled in several forms of martial arts but so am I--”
Of course her rant was cut short when the cabinet door was thrown open.
“Oh dear…”
Shego winced as Betty came running back into the room, almost colliding with her.
“Watch it!” Shego grumbled, shoving a plastic bag into Betty’s free hand, her other currently occupied with soothing the burn in her…assaulted areas.
“She has quite the strong hand…”
“Yup, that’s my Kimmie…”
Kim entered soon after, the newspaper tucked into the waistband of her cargo pants.
“Now hurry and clean this mess up, and Betty get ready we’re going to the vets when Ron gets here.”
The oldest of the three frowned in confusion. “Whatever for?”
Shego only grinned when that was said, chuckling darkly. “Oh you’ll see…”
“Where the hell are you going to stick that? A-and watch where you’re pointing that needle!”
“Ms. Possible your…newest addition is much more aggressive then the first, I may need assistance in holding her down.”
“I’ll be glad to help you with that, doc!”
“Don’t you touch me, Shego!”
“Get her now, while she’s distracted!”
“While I’m wha–AH!”
“Aw, poor baby…has the tears stopped?”
“Silence…devil creature…and I was not crying for your information, I had something stuck in my eye…”
Kim Possible sighed, watching a shivering Betty Director crawl beneath the covers on the couch. They’d had to hastly fix up the living room to it’s once former glory before they’d left and everything now seemed to be in order. You couldn’t really see the burn marks on the wall. Now, as Ron, Kim, Shego, and Betty with Wade on the Kimmunicator waiting in the living room for the arrival of Monique and for Kim to muster up enough courage to tell her parents about this little arrangement they were, unfortunately going to be subjected to more of Shego and Betty’s arguing. With a sigh Kim only burried her head further into her arms. Shoving Shego and Betty’s banter into the back of her mind.
“What am I going to do about these two?”
“Um, place them in obedience school?”
“No Ron, I didn’t mean…like that.”
“Don’t worry to much into it KP. Telling your parents about it won’t be that hard. They’re understanding. If anything the tweebs will love a pet who can blast fire from her hands.”
“Oh great, that’s the least of my worries.”
“Well,” Wade spoke up, “Let’s fill out the rest of Dr. Director’s papers and then we can worry about what we’ll need to do. Kim, after you get you’re parents approval you’ll have to go to Smarty Mart and get some pet things.”
“Pet things?” Kim asked.
“Yes. Special items needed for the care of your pets.”
“But how…”
“I know it seems odd, but we can’t leave any loop-holes for the GJ to hack into. We’ll get a list of things needed for the care of wolves and…hey, what are you going to deem Dr. Director as?”
“Deem me as?”
Kim gave the confused Betty a look over. “Well, since Shego is a wolf.”
“Hooooooowl.”
“Quiet Shego! Now…since Shego is a wolf, maybe Betty should be something feline?”
“Oh oh oh!” Ron raised his hand, waving it about wildly. “And she’ll need a name! So how about a lion?”
“Oh I dunno, Dr. Director doesn’t scream lion, Ron.”
“I agree with Wade.”
“More like kitty cat…”
“Shego…”
“I prefer to be referred to as a tiger if anything.”
“A predatory animal?”
“Booyah! Tiger!”
“Okay then, Tiger.” Wade mumbled, scribbling down the appropriate information. “Now, a name.”
“Oh here comes the fun part.” Shego smirked.
“What’s wrong with Betty?”
“When we send in the official papers, like we sent in ‘Sheeroo’s’, if they said Betty Director then the GJ would know about it right away if they were to hack into the pet registry system. They may find out what we’re doing and all our plans go down the sink.” Wade responded.
“At least that’s what they told me anyway. Hmph, they tried to name ME Pookie. Can you image that?”
“Hah, it suits you.”
“Shut it. Mama’s Girl.”
“Now let’s not start you two…How about…-”
“Well, how about Elizabeth?”
“Sounds to much like Betty to me.” Ron mumbled. “In fact…”
“Don’t dwell to much on it, Ron Factor.” Betty added, cautiously…
“Oh yeah! I’m still the Ron Factor!”
“Great way to make him loose focus, Elizabeth.”
“Don’t call me that!”
“Shego, Betty! Can it!”
“Okay okay!” Wade muttered, “Let’s not take all day like we did the last time. You guys still have trips to take and things to do.”
“So how about Sheeroo…and Elizaroo?”
“Ew.”
“I agree actually,” Shego mumbled, sticking out her tongue.
“Direcaroo?”
“Betaroo.”
“Betaroo?” Betty whispered, tapping her chin in thought.
“What is up with the Pandaroo sounding names?” Shego scowled.
“Hey, it’s my favorite cuddle buddle!”
Nobody noticed the intense shudder Dr. Director seemed to give off at the sound of the word cuddle buddle.
“Directoroo!”
“That’s to much of a mouthful, Ron.”
“Then let’s just stick with Betaroo, shall we?” An exhausted sounding Wade suggested, scribbling it down before any more protest could be heard.
Heads would lift at the sound of the doorbell next. “Right on time…” Kim whispered, but as she rose to answer it Ron was up and over to the door before she had time to get to it.
“While Ron answers the door and the others get ready, go blow the big news on your parents.”
Kim gave a sigh toward Wade and a nod. “I should, huh? Alright…”
“Oh and Ron, while I’m talking to my parents give Betaroo her ‘present’.”
“Present?”
“Right-o, KP!”
Leaving the rest to Ron Kim entered the kitchen, finding her parents already stationed there. Mr. Possible was reading his newspaper at the kitchen table as usual while her mom seemed to be hovering over him with a look of confusion.
“When you open those things, dear, what is it that your always reading?”
“It’s a man thing sweetie…” Came Ms. Possible’s muffled and distracted voice.
“Mom, Dad?” Kim asked meekly, shuffling into the room. “There’s something I need to tell you.”
“What is it, Kimmie-cub?” Mrs. Possible asked, settling down into a chair beside her husband while Kim took the seat across from her.
Taking a deep breath Kim began. “You know about our…guests?”
“The guests that scorched the walls in the living room?” Mumbled her father.
“What? You can see…oh well yes…them.”
“What about them?”
“Well, you know, with all the happenings and the corrupting with the GJ and the whole animal thing I’ve found out a way to stop it.”
“Oh that’s wonderful dear.” Mr. Possible mumbled once more as he turned a page in the newspaper.
“How do you plan to do that?”
“Well I sort of…kind of…adopted them.”
“You what?” Mrs. Possible said, deadpan and serious.
“Well you guys are always talking about responsibility and how pets are a great responsibility so I decided to make them my pets to you know work on my responsibility…?” Kim squeaked.
Her mother was very silent for a long time, a deep frown etched on her face but once she’d opened her mouth to respond to that the rocket scientist had already begun to speak.
“Well then, Kimmie this is a big step for you.”
“Uh, yeah it is Dad, but I promise I can do it! At least until we can figure out this whole GJ thing.”
“Well then, just make sure they follow the rules. No pets at the dinner table, no pets on the furniture, no…howling at all types of the night and the ilk. They have to be potty trained and walked, no complaining about it either.”
“No…bestiality either…” Mrs. Possible added meekly afterward, causing Kim to bang her head against the table in relief and embarrassment.
“That wasn’t what it looked like…ugh, sure thing mom.”
“So what are they dear?” Her father asked, obviously still to distracted to really understand the pet situation.
“A uh…cat and a dog?”
“Let the cat out at night.”
“Oh um…I’m sure that won’t really be necessary-”
“Yes dear, you hear what they say about letting the cats out at night. They hunt the neighborhood birds!”
“Oh, well learn something new everyday…”
Kim left then, hoping to sneak back to the living room before her father could issue her any more commands. What she found then made her giggle.
“Mr. Stoppable!”
“Ah! Shego, help!”
“No way, sidekick.”
“Monique?”
“Don’t think I can tango with the tiger.”
Ron had obviously gotten on an identical voice fixed collar to Betty, and she was not pleased about that and seemed to be trying to stalk Ron into a corner for the kill.
“Betaroo!”
The voice activated collar beeped and vibrated against ‘Betaroo’s’ neck, causing her to pause from the sudden motion of it long enough for Ron to slip past her grasp and hide behind Kim.
“Alright then, girls and animals! Let’s go shopping!” Monique called, already beaming at the thought of an outing with this group. This is going to be fun.
“We need leashes…” Kim mumbled.
“What?” Shego and Betty yelled, obviously this was the last straw.
“No way am I walking in public with a leash on, Kimmie.”
“Likewise, Ms. Possible.”
“No no no! You guys have to!” Kim giggled, walking toward the door to pull out two leather leashes from the bag. “These new leashes are said to be nearly indestructible, Wade made them just for you two.”
“Damn that super genius.”
Shego yelped as she felt the swat from the newspaper.
“Language!” Kim warned.
“This is so not fair, Princess!” Shego whined, listening to the alien click of the leash around the small metal hoop in the collar.
“Hmph, just shut up and take it.” Betty muttered, watching Shego cautiously through the corner of her eye as her own leash was clipped on.
“What? No silk?” Shego muttered as she slipped on the sandals Kim had given her and as Betty slipped on her boots.
“They don’t make silk leashes Shego,” Kim said, rolling her eyes as she snatched up the silent Kimmunicator and pocketed it, grabbing a startled Ron with her other hand and placing the two leash loops around her wrist.
“Oh they could if you made ‘em…” Shego muttered. “Just how are we getting there anyway?”
It was then that Monique opened the door to the house, showing off the shiny black van in the driveway.
“Girls, and guys,” Monique quickly added, after seeing Ron’s upset expression. “We’re taking the Monique mobile.”
“What is that thing?” Betty asked, astonished.
“It’s called a car, sweetie.” Shego purred, “Never seen one before?”
“Oh well, I’ve never seen…one quite like that.” She muttered as Kim lead them toward the van and slid open the door, shoving the pair of ‘animals’ in the back seat.
“Probably only seen the back of Limo’s before then, huh Director?”
“That would be none of your business…hey wait a second, what was that ‘back of’ comment suppose to mean?”
“Better sit in the back with the debate team Kim.” Monique sighed, rolling her eyes up to the rear view mirror as the pair of pets seemed to already be invading one another’s personal space.
“Yeah I better…” Kim sighed.
“Booyah! Front seat score!”
“Heheh, yeah!” Rufus said.
“Alright then, Ron my man! Buckle up and let’s go!”
“Land!”
Dr. Betty Director spilled out from the backseat once the car door was open, lying on the ground for a few moments as she waited for the nausea to pass.
“Heh, care ride prove to be a tad to much for you, Doc?”
“Oh shut up you devil woman!”
“Yeouch, those insults hurt, Doc.”
“Now Shego…She just isn’t used to…wild uncontrollable roller coaster like driving.”
“My driving is not wild…and uncontrollable.” Monique grumbled, watching Kim help pick up a disorientated Dr. Director from off the ground.
“Booyah! That was awesome! We were like, zooooom, and then swoooosh!”
“Haah! Zoom, swoosh, booom!”
“Calm down you two.” Kim said, motioning for Ron and Rufus to calm themselves as well as come forward as she grabbed onto Sheeroo’s and Betaroo’s leashes.
Monique lead the way into Club Banana, entering much like she owned the place. But then again…
“So girlfriend, what do you want your pets to wear? They got to cruise in style.”
“Well? What do you guys what to wear?” Giving the leashes she slack she let the two girls wander.
Shego returned soon enough, her attire consisting mostly in blacks and greens while Betty soon returned with dark blues and blacks in her grasp.
“Looks good to me.”
“Heheh, hey Ms. Director. Did you get some panties too?”
Betty almost fell flat on her face, as well as Kim who was holding her leash at the time.
“Shego!”
“Aw, sorry Kimmie, “Shego purred, coming around to brush up against the smaller girl as Dr. Director regained herself.
How am I going to survive this…
“Shego behave yourself in public!”
Ron and Monique, who’d been talking about wrestling over in the corner somewhere soon wandered over to save Kim from embarrassment.
“Alright then girls, got you’re purchases?” Lifting up a golden colored credit card Monique would wink. “First trips on the house.”
Excited by the prospect of more clothes for free Shego left Kim to her own devices…for now.
Cuz you know I can’t stay away from her for long…
“Come on Doc.”
“Wait I was–ack!”
Watching as Shego dragged Dr. Director over to some other section of the store Kim would smile slightly.
“You got a lot on your hands, you know that?”
“Yeah…yeah I know.”
The same eyes that had been spying upon Kim Possible earlier that day at school now narrowed in more suspicion then before. The eyes of Bonnie Rockwaller to be specific as she hid. She’d only wait until Kim Possible and the others left the store, giggling and laughing and toying about before she revealed herself.
“Now I’m really curious…looks like I’ll be paying our little cheer captain a visit real soon…”
“Mom! We’re home!”
“Kim!”
“Oh no…”
“Oh what?”
But Shego’s question was never answered as the tweebs came barreling down the stairs in excitement, skidding to a stop in front of Kim, Shego, and Betty. Monique had offered to take Ron home and they were to meet up tomorrow for their Smarty Mart visit and a more missionly take on the day.
“Oh!” Betty exclaimed, stepping forward some to examine the twins. “These are?”
“Tim and Jim!” The twins said in union.
“So you got some pets?”
“Are these it?”
“Cool! The lady with the fire hands!”
“Can we play with them?”
“No! Now scatter tweebs!”
“Aw Kim, you gotta share!”
“No way!”
“Oh, they’re cute…to a strange degree.” Betty mumbled, causing Shego to wince.
“They’re not cute their annoying. Want me to sic ‘em for you, Kimmie?” Shego growled, advancing threateningly.
“No, no! That’s fine. Because the tweebs were just leaving, and if they leave now I might let them play with us in the backyard tomorrow morning.”
“Oh cool!” They yelled, before rushing away.
“Play? Play what?”
“Uh, don’t worry about it. Time for bed, we got a lot to do in the morning.”
“Ah.”
Betty began to eye the couch, before Kim coughed stealing her attention.
“Sorry Betty, er, Betaroo. Dad says no pets on the furniture. So, you’re up in my room with me and Shego tonight.”
“Hah! You get the floor.”
“So do you Shego.”
“No way!” Shego grumbled, kicking off her shoes as Betty did the same.
“I’ll make you two pallets on the floor. It wouldn’t be fair for one to sleep in the bed with me and the other couldn’t.”
“Actually, I don’t mind if she--”
“Nope! I’ve made up my mind, come along!” And up the stairs Kim went. Besides, Kim thought, if Shego rubs against me in her sleep one more time…I dunno what I’ll do.
Shego bounded up the steps after Kim and Betty followed somewhat sedately, this had been quite a day for her.
Kim had already begun to make up the pallets on the floor for the pair when she heard a gasp and the sound of a body hit a wall. Kim turned, expecting to find Shego playing some type of dirty game but instead she just found Betty staring wide eyed at her bed.
“What is it?”
Unable to say anything she merely pointed to the…abomination that was sitting atop the pillows there.
“She’s pointing at your Pandaroo, Pumpkin.”
“My…Pandaroo?”
“It’s a beast!”
“I think she’s…afraid of it.” Shego snickered, arms wrapped around her stomach as she tried to contain her laughter.
“T-t-t-this is no laughing matter!”
Kim frowned, was Betty afraid of cuddle buddies? Taking the Pandaroo from off the bed she moved to show it to Betty. “See? It’s not scary. It’s very adorable and cute. Good for cuddling.”
“I’m good for cuddling too, Kimmie.”
“Hush Shego.”
“Take it away!” A shivering Dr. Director squeaked.
With a soft sigh Kim tucked the ‘Terrifying Pandaroo’ beneath her bed sheets. Must be some serious child scaring…
With the Pandaroo gone Betty seemed to visible relax, that was until Shego managed to rip it out from beneath the sheets and toss it at her.
“Eeeeeep! It’s a children’s toy made of stuffing and cloth!” Shego said, sarcasticly.
“Shego!”
“AH!”
Mr. Possible abruptly sat up in bed that time, clicking on the lamp as he glanced around the room.
“Sweetie?”
“Yes…dear…?” A now sleepy agitated Mrs. Possible replied.
“Did you hear something? Like the sound of a scream from a woman who has a sever and rare phobia of cuddle buddies?”
“…Go back to sleep dear.”
To be continued…