The next night, near a small, unremarkable hut on the outskirts of Rome, a hooded woman hid in the shadow of a nearby copse of trees until she saw what she had been waiting for: a rider in resplendent gilded armor trotting his horse up the road.
Shiko sighed. Apparently Dracus wouldn’t know the meaning of ‘discreet’ even if she hit him over the head with the Encyclopedia Imperia.
Actually, considering how hard Shiko could hit, it was doubtful if Dracus would end up knowing anything at all, apart from pain, lots and lots of pain.
Shiko wished she had a copy of the Encyclopedia Imperia.
“What’s that you said, Shiko?” Dracus asked, as he dismounted.
“I said,” Shiko replied through gritted teeth, “it isn’t a covert operation if you go out in full dress armor!”
“Now, now, Shiko,” Dracus said grandly, “you know I’m too respectable a General to be spied upon.”
“Too respectable, or too harmless?”
“Very funny, Shiko,” Dracus grumbled, opening the hut’s door. “You should be on-”
He gasped as he looked inside the hut. “Is that- is-?”
“Yeah, why?”
Dracus was in love. The fact that the building was shrouded in torchlight only added to the romantic mood.
Those curves, that potential- everything inside and outside just stole his heart, stopped his breath.
His hands longed to touch, his arms longed wrap themselves around his love… his mind and soul weren’t his anymore.
He had never felt this way before- it was so… there was no other word for it. He had never ever ever felt so nice.
“Sheesh, get a grip on yourself why don’t you?”
“I can’t help it, Shiko,” Dracus said, his arms already in a tight embrace. “I just can’t help it.”
“…It’s a bunch of mirrors arranged on a wooden circle, Dracus, (1)” Shiko said incredulously, before breaking into a smirk. “But you know what? I think this explains a lot about your social life.”
“Hardy-har-har, Shiko,” Dracus grumbled. “Laugh all you want, but this device here is all I’ll need to fulfill my plans of known world domination! AAAHA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HAAA!” (2)
“Yeesh, where’d you get that laugh from?”
“You like it? I made it up myself!” Dracus said proudly.
“I know- it’s that obvious,” Shiko said dismissively, Dracus wincing in response.
“Oh yeah? Well, uh, one day, Shiko, one day, all the greatest people in the world- meaning, people like me- will laugh like that! You’ll see!”
“Trust me, it’ll never catch on.”
Dracus sighed. “Must you naysay everything I do, Shiko?” he asked.
“Now that you mention it, yeah, I think I must.”
“Why, Shiko, why?” Dracus asked plaintively.
“Because everything you say is made of ‘stupid’ and ‘crazy’,” Shiko smiled, not a trace of shame evident as she counted them off on her hand.
“You know Shiko, it’s remarks like that which make me wonder why I keep you around.”
”Well, maybe it’s because I’m beautiful, witty, talented-”
“And you say everything I say is made of stupid and crazy,” Dracus said under his voice.
“I heard that!”
Grumbling, Dracus went back to looking at the device Shiko had stolen for him the night before. He wasn’t actually telling the whole truth when he said that the device was all he needed. He also needed money, lots of it, not to mention enough political power to shut up anyone who wasn’t supposed to know about this- and he needed them both very quickly-
His eyes opened widely as an idea occurred to him. And unlike his other ideas, no matter which how this one turned out, he’d still end up winning…
“Oh Shiko,” he asked sweetly.
Uh oh. “What is it now?” she sighed.
(scene change)
Flickering torchlight illuminated the halls of the dungeon- except tonight, there wasn’t any guard to block it out from time to time- which was a good thing, considering one of the gladiators wasn’t there.
“She’s been out a long time, hasn’t she?” Al-Wadjet asked.
“Hmm, I guess so- I haven’t really been counting,” Ronnicus replied, as nonchalantly as he could manage.
“Oh really?” Al-Wadjet asked slyly. “Is that why you haven’t been sleeping?”
“Well, uh- you’re not sleeping either!” Ronnicus said.
“Yeah, but I’ve got an excuse,” Al-Wadjet replied. Even though Ronnicus’s only contact with Al-Wadjet was a hole in his cell’s ceiling, he could definitely see the smug smile on the Egyptian’s face. “I’ve got to make some medicine.”
“About that,” Ronnicus said. “What exactly did you put in the guards’ food anyway? Some kind of poison?”
“Ron, please- I’m not that kind of guy,” Al-Wadjet said disgustedly.
“So what did you put in?”
“Just my own secret recipe of herbs and spices.”
“Uh…”
“Laxatives.” (3)
There was a short pause before Ronnicus finally said, “Dude, you sure you couldn’t have just poisoned them?”
“Very funny, Ron.”
“Al-Wadjet? I wasn’t joking. Have you seen the guards’ toilets? What you did was cold, man- cold.”
There was a short laugh from Al-Wadjet, and then he asked, “So, ‘fess up- you’re worried about her, aren’t you?”
“Well- not exactly.”
“Huh?”
“No, not really,” Ronnicus said, trying to sound nonchalant.
“Liar,” Rufus whispered from his own bed of straw.
“Well, I am,” Al-Wadjet said. “The guards here may be out of the mosaic, but they’re not the only ones that’ll try to stop her escaping. Rome is a big empire.”
“Escape?” Ronnicus exclaimed. “Who said anything about escaping? Kim said she was going to do a little investigation.”
“ ‘Investigation’? Come on Ron- be serious. Why would she want to help the Romans?”
“…I- I didn’t really think about that,” Ronnicus admitted, his heart sinking into his gut.
“Exactly,” Al-Wadjet replied. “To tell the truth Ron, I’m kinda surprised you didn’t go too.”
“What can I say, Ronacles’s needed right here,” Ronnicus said with as much bravado as he could manage. In a more normal tone of voice, he added, “Besides, even if I wanted to… I can’t.”
“Ah, your parents,” Al-Wadjet said understandingly.
“Exactly,” Ronnicus sighed, when a thought struck him. “Say, why didn’t you go?”
Al-Wadjet laughed. “Ron, let’s just say being around all this food hasn’t exactly made me an outdoors person.”
(scene change)
Mentally sighing in relief, Kiminax thanked whatever Gods that might be listening that the Romans weren’t exactly outdoors people- if the Arcani who was now walking back to his comrades had any real experience of the woodland and its creatures, he would have known that squirrels don’t rustle around clumps of bushes this late at night.
“You sure it wasn’t anything, sir?”
“Of course I’m sure!” the Arcani commander said, his helmet muffling his voice, waving his torch in emphasis. “I’m your commanding officer- it is my job to know these things.”
Sighing in relief as he walked away, Kiminax slowly stood up to get a better look-
“Gotcha!” someone said from behind her, grabbing her arms. “I’ve caught our spy, sir!” the unseen assailant yelled, as Kiminax struggled in his arms, cursing under her breath. “Returning to the scene of the crime, eh?” he sneered, ignoring her. “Either you’re really brave, or really stupid. Here’s a tip- we’re the Arcani, we know all about your barbarian tactics!”
“Oh really?” she said, throwing her head upwards into the guard’s unprotected jaw. As he staggered back, spitting out a few teeth, Kiminax ran to the Arcani commander while trying to ignore the pain in her own head.
The commander lunged forth with his sword, but in his heavy armor, his speed was no match for the lighter Kiminax. Dodging his clumsy attack easily, the Gaul caught his arm and elbow, and the help of his own momentum, Kiminax threw him into the Arcanus behind her.
The Gaul didn’t even have time to catch her breath when the sound of rapid footsteps alerted her to the presence of the other two Arcani rushing behind her. As she turned to face them, they suddenly split up, one to her left, one to her right, before warily circling her with blades drawn.
Kiminax heard the sound of the commander’s groaning behind her. Time to take his two goons out.
She rushed forward at one of the Romans. As she expected, the Arcanus in front of her moved into a defensive position, while the one behind her charged forward, with surprising speed for such a heavily armored man- like his captain, however, he wasn’t fast enough- or so Kiminax thought. “Ha! Do you think the Arcani’d fall for that trick twice!” the man said, suddenly pulling his sword arm back before Kiminax could grab it, while lunging forward with his other arm to catch Kiminax.
“Yep,” Kiminax said simply, using his arm as leverage to kick upwards.
“Mental note,” the guard commander muttered as the Arcanus toppled, “get Requisition to give us chin guards.”
The last Arcanus, seeing his friend go down, reached for a horn at his side, when the commander yelled, “Stop!”
“Sir?”
“You heard me,” the commander said. “She fights too well to be a mere bandit.”
“Uh, thanks,” Kiminax said.
“Pot it,” he replied, although there was a tone of admiration in his voice. “Who do you work for?”
“What?” Kiminax asked.
“You heard me- who do you work for?”
“I don’t have to answer your questions,” Kiminax said unsteadily.
“Oh, but I think you do,” the man said. “All he has to do is blow the horn he has got there,” the captain gestured at the other Arcanus, “and before you know it, there will be at least twenty to thirty Arcani out here on horseback, and no matter how fast you are, I don’t think you can outrun a horse. Now, who do you work for?”
“I- I don’t work for anybody,” Kiminax replied. Something in this man’s voice- his calmness, his bluntness, something reminded her of the wise men of her homeland, and she felt at peace. “I just wanted to know what was happening.” She gulped. Men armed to the teeth, she could handle. The commander’s sudden silence, however, demanded to be filled. “I wanted to help investigate,” he proclaimed boldly.
“Investigate?” the lesser Arcanus said incredulously. “You? Investigate-”
“Shut up,” the captain said coolly, before turning back to Kiminax. “Let me get this straight- you are out here, in the middle of the night, with no purpose but to ‘help our investigation’, correct?” (4)
“Y-yes,” Kiminax mumbled. “I mean, yes!” she said, more defiantly this time.
“And you expect me to believe this?” he asked. Even though his helmet covered his eyes, even more so that it was night, Kiminax felt his eyes boring into her own.
“Yes,” Kiminax said, staring back, the confidence in her voice matching the amusement in the Arcani captain’s.
They stood, gazes locked for a moment, when the captain snorted. “You,” he said, turning to the other Arcanus, “Take care of these two- I want to talk to this newcomer. Don’t try anything funny.”
“Sir! You can’t be serious!”
The captain turned to his subordinate. Flinching from the officer’s gaze, the Arcanus nodded hurriedly, and moved to their horses to get some medical supplies. “Now,” the captain said, walking Kiminax away out of earshot, “why don’t we have a little chat…”
(scene change)
Her stomach still grumbling, Bonita shut the outhouse door as silently as she could. Even though it was exclusive only to the school’s higher, administration (meaning her and her family) it still stank- and that wasn’t the end of her problems.
What had promised to be a night of passion with Briccus, a night of blood, sweat and tears (minus the blood and tears- at least, not her blood or tears), turned out. Oh sure, there was a great deal of groaning, a lot of grunting, and don’t forget the strange smells…
“I hate my life,” she muttered. If it weren’t for the fact that the Egyptian cook was a cheaply bought slave, she’d have him executed. Or flogged. Flogged then executed. Then she’d flog his corpse. Yes.
Oh, of course you could say that it was her fault for eating gladiators’ food too, but wasn’t that the point of slumming it? You know, slumming it? That being said, the last thing she expected to have happen to her was-
Well now, here was another thing she didn’t expect.
Drawing into the shadows, she saw a lithe, redheaded girl drop down into the courtyard, obviously not expecting to be seen, judging by the way she brazenly ran across the well-lit grounds.
Bonita grinned, or at least, let her teeth show. She had a plan…
Author’s note: Yes, I know some of you were expecting slash by now. All I can ask (or rather, beg) of you is that you remain patient. I’m not much inclined to instant gratification, as readers of my Teen Titans series will know all too well. Sorry.
Historical Notes:
(1)Some of my more historically-inclined readers might have guessed what this is. If so, I ask that you refrain from spoiling it, okay? Thank you.
(2)Contrary to what you may think, this isn’t the first evil laugh in history, merely the first recorded one. The first evil laugh in history was in 20,000 BC, with Shaman Drakdrak’s “Whoohwhoohwhooh EEEKEEEKEEK WHOOOOH!”, to which his assistant Sh’ko replied, “Ugh.”
(3)The Greek philosopher Hippocrates, often called the Father of Medicine, once said, “Let medicine be thy food, and food thy medicine,” and considering the level that Greek culture had influenced Egyptian culture, as well as the Egyptian’s own mastery of medicine, it isn’t so hard to conceive of an Egyptian cook being a kind of General Practitioner.
(4)As in the previous chapter, I want to mention that I’m taking substantial, Hollywood-level liberties with the Arcani. Historically, the Arcani weren’t as widespread, or even as skilful as my story makes them out to be- and it is definitely untrue (as far as I know) that this Arcani officer is who I will reveal him to be…