Apparently both Ron and Shego felt that “civility” was the same as “not quite insulting”. So they didn't speak to each other. This meant Kim was forced to carry on separate conversations with each person. When she talked to Shego, Ron became silent, and vice versa.
As if this wasn't bizarre enough, apparently Sappho had picked up on the hostility, and since Sappho had obviously decided a long time ago that Shego was her favorite human behind Dr. Freeman (and Kim wasn't entirely sure if Sappho even liked him more), that meant the spaceship wasn't talking to him either.
Kim was trying to be the diplomat, but if this kept up, she was going to lay into them both.
Fortunately their trip to Cambridge was relatively quick, and they landed near the Harvard campus. “If not bickering is the best you two can do,” Kim grumbled as the trio made the walk to the laboratory where Justine Flanner's invention had been stolen, “then I trust you can also not bicker in front of the scientists.”
They didn't answer. Kim felt like screaming.
Justine was waiting for them at the door. It had only been five years, and she was instantly recognizable by the blonde hair and long face. “Kim Possible,” she said neutrally. “Thank you for coming on such short notice.”
“Hey, no big. Anything for a Middleton High alumna,” Kim said.
Justine looked curiously at Shego. “You look vaguely familiar,” she said.
Shego shrugged. “You might have seen me once. I was working for Dr. Drakken when he genetically created that monster in Middleton a few years ago. Kim says you invented some machine to make it go away.”
“I think DNAmy created the monster, actually,” Ron said.
She rounded on him. “You think I care if that blue-skinned bastard did it or not?” Shego snarled.
Justine blinked.
Kim laughed nervously. “Why don't you tell us what happened, Justine?” She hadn't violated Shego's privacy by telling Ron, or anyone else for that matter, what Dr. Drakken had done to her. Maybe she should have at least conveyed to Ron the depths of Shego's hatred for her ex-employer.
The scientific genius looked at them curiously before gesturing for them to follow her inside. “Whoever did it was very good,” Justine said. “It seemed to be a professional job.”
“What exactly did they steal, Justine?” Kim asked.
“It was a variation on that device from high school, Kim,” she replied. “I've been working on the creation of similar portals and wormholes since graduating from Harvard three years ago.”
“Three?” Ron said. “We graduated from high school four years ago.”
“College isn't bound to the four-year curriculum like public high school is,” Justine explained. “I graduated within a year. They were kind enough to offer me a position with the university almost immediately. I'm currently the assistant director of the university research labs. I could be director, but I prefer not to be swamped with the petty administrative tasks.”
“Wow,” Kim said.
Shego, unsurprisingly, seemed unimpressed.
“You passed up three years of college parties?” Ron asked, aghast. “Voluntarily?!”
Kim shot him a look. “You were saying about the invention?”
“It's capable of generating portals to any time in the past,” Justine said.
“A time machine?” Kim asked.
“A very poor one, I'm afraid,” Justine told her, frowning. “The portals it generates are very small, no bigger than my closed fist. And they only remain open for a second or two.”
“Then why was it stolen?”
“Well, you see, after one of our experiments with the device, we discovered this in the testing area.” Justine took them into a lab and showed them a clear plastic box. Inside was what appeared to be a large insect.
“Gross,” Ron said.
“Gross!” Rufus agreed.
“What kind of bug is it?” Kim asked.
“A kind that became extinct millions of years ago,” Justine said.
“You mean it somehow flew through the portal when you opened it?”
“Not likely. This specimen is too big to fit through one. We deduced that an ordinary modern-day fly was by chance caught in the target area, and was somehow de-evolved.” Justine grew more excited. “Don't you see? It became its own evolutionary ancestor when its DNA became trapped in the portal's radiation.”
“So this is the kind of fly that was buzzing around Middleton when dinosaurs walked the earth?” Shego asked.
“Precisely. We know because we tested the device on several other animals. They all showed the same effects. We all feel this will give us a chance to study animals that have been extinct for many years.”
“Or you could sell them to zoos for lots of money,” Shego said.
They all looked at her.
“What?” she asked. “It's what I'd do. Trade in the elephants and tigers for the mammoths and sabertooths, make a killing.”
“Or a different kind of killing altogether,” Kim said. “Maybe the thief could figure out a way to turn some lizard into a Tyrannosaurus.”
“The thought had occurred to us,” Justine agreed. “That is, the thought that the thief would use it for such a purpose,” she hastily added. “We wouldn't use it for such a thing.”
“Oh, sure,” Ron said. He leaned backwards. “Urassic-jay Ark-pay,” he murmured to Kim behind his hand.
“Who knew of its existence?” Kim asked.
Justine sighed. “Unfortunately, word of our discovery leaked out to the area academic community. There are a lot of universities in the Boston area, and these scientists and teachers like to mingle a lot.”
“So what makes you think it was Professor Dementor?”
“Well, the last time he was here, he had this very strange gleam in his eye, like he was imagining what he could - “
“I'm sorry, wait a minute,” Kim interrupted. “The last time he was here?”
“Why, yes,” Justine said. “He's visited twice to see the machine.”
“Visited? He's a criminal!”
“No, he isn't,” Justine replied, shaking her head. “He's a college professor over at Boston University.
Kim, Ron, and Shego all looked at her, stunned. “He's a teacher?” Ron finally asked.
“Of course. That is why they call him Professor, after all.”
“Excuse us,” Kim said to her, turning away. She immediately whipped out her Kimmunicator. “Wade, we've got a sitch here.”
“What's up?” he asked.
“Could you check the personnel records for Boston University and see if Professor Dementor works there?”
Wade blinked. “Works there?”
“Just do it, Wade.”
“Okay, hold on.” He typed quickly for half a minute. “Huh. What do you know?”
“What?”
“According to their records, they've had a Professor Augustus Dementor teaching engineering and robotics classes for the past two years,” Wade said. “Not sure how I missed that,” he added sheepishly.
“Maybe it's not him,” Ron said. “Maybe he's gone straight.”
Shego grabbed him by the shirt. “It didn't seem that way when he was trying to kill me a few weeks ago,” she hissed. “With help from the other criminal wackjobs.”
“Shego, please!” Kim said, making her let go of Ron. “Get us everything you can find, Wade - personnel records, scientific journals, area newspapers. I need to know what ‘Augustus’ is up to.”
“What a stupid name,” Ron said when she turned the Kimmunicator off. “Who would name their kid after a month?”
Shego rolled her eyes in a very obvious manner, and Ron bristled, sensing she was making fun of him without knowing why.
“Justine,” Kim said, definitely knowing why she was aggravated right now, “do you have a picture of the machine so I know what it looks like?”
“Right here,” she replied, immediately handing over schematics from a nearby worktable.
Kim unrolled the blueprints. “It looks like a laser rifle,” she said.
“It functions in a similar manner. The device fires a bolt of energy that emanates from the tip, creating a portal approximately twenty feet away. Or nearer, if a living object is in its path.”
“So,” Kim said slowly, “if someone were to fire this device at a human being, is it possible that the person would become some sort of prehistoric man?”
“As you have undoubtedly said from time to time, Kim, it is quite possible,” Justine replied.
“Well, this is just great,” Kim said when the three had returned to Sappho. She put her hands on her hips and glared at them. “Professor Dementor just happens to have been a university professor under our noses all this time. With that device he could turn anybody into a caveman. And best of all, my two partners are butting heads like moose trying to impress a mate!”
Shego and Ron glared at each other, then at her. “It's not my fault that Ron's irrelevant to this little mission,” Shego finally said.
“And you can't blame me for remembering that Shego is a thief and a liar who has always been proud of the fact that she's evil,” Ron retorted.
Kim clenched her fists until they turned white. “That's it,” she said. “I've had it. I have totally had it. If the two of you are going to be this way the entire mission, then I'm having Sappho bring BOTH of you back to Middleton.”
That seemed to get through. “WHAT?!” they said simultaneously.
“Shego,” she said coldly, “you used to be one of the bad guys. You've earned my trust since then, but you haven't even tried to earn Ron's, so don't act pissy when he gives you a hard time. And don't try to look hurt,” she added when she saw the look on Shego's face. Kim wasn't having any of it. “You're my friend, but this is about being professional. I'm the one who's been called in on this case, and I decide who's helping me. Right now, you're not.”
“Ron,” Kim continued, turning to look at her best friend, “even if Shego had been trying to earn your trust, you haven't given her a chance to. She's got to understand that you're not Drakken's buffoon anymore, but you've got to accept that Shego isn't his hired gun either. I'm not saying you have to trust her right away, but the fact that you can't even cut her some slack makes me wonder if you've lost faith in my judgment.”
“Kim!” Ron said, shocked. “You know I could never do that. It's just…” He stepped closer. “We're a team, and Shego's trying to come between us.”
“She's trying to become one of us, Ron,” Kim told him. “Is this you being jealous? You can't share me with someone else?”
She tried to ignore the irony of her remarks, since Shego had already made it quite clear that she didn't like having to share Kim.
Ron looked embarrassed. “No, of course not,” he said, rubbing the back of his neck.
Kim sighed. “I don't want you to go. I want you both with me. But this cannot continue. Either the two of you promise to work with each other, or you can accompany each other home.”
As she'd expected, Ron was the first to give in. “We worked together against the Acceptables,” he admitted. “I guess we can do it again.”
Shego gnashed her teeth, but she accepted the hand she offered, and more importantly, she didn't try to choke the life out of it. “The things I do for you, Kim,” she muttered.
“Thank you,” Kim said. “Now, how about we head over to Boston University and see what Dementor is up to?”
“I mean, just how stupid can these people be?” Shego asked as the three of them continued to stake out Professor Dementor's apartment - a humble abode for the scientist who'd once resided in a heavily guarded fortress.
“You did say that the Acceptables were extorting money from him,” Kim pointed out. “Since he obviously couldn't support himself as a criminal any more, he must have decided to make money the old-fashioned way. He is a genius, after all.”
“But he's still wearing his mask!”
“Maybe he told them there was an accident and he was scarred for life,” Kim suggested. “What are they supposed to say, ‘Before hiring you, Professor Dementor, can we see what's under the hood?'”
“They would if they were buying a used car,” Shego muttered.
“These are human beings we're talking about, Shego,” Kim said. “You still need to work on the concept of tactfulness, I guess.”
“Tact is another word for cowardice,” Shego replied.
“Really?” Ron asked. “I thought it meant something else.”
Kim leaned against the tree she was hiding behind. So far they'd only managed to discover that Professor Dementor taught a class today at the university, that he drove a slightly pre-owned Mercedes, and that he lived in a neighborhood where many other students and professors lived. There was nowhere in his apartment building that could hide any sort of secret lab. Kim didn't doubt Shego when she said that Dementor had been at her apartment several weeks ago, but she wondered if that had been a feeble attempt on his part to revive his criminal career. “We can't wait out here all night,” Kim said. “Let's give him another hour or two, and if he's still inside, we'll go back to Sappho and plan for tomorrow. Maybe his being here is a coincidence. After all, plenty of people knew it was here. It could even be DNAmy,” she guessed. “Genetically altering animals is right up her alley.”
“Kim, he's leaving!” Ron hissed as he peered through some bushes. “And - whoa, nice duds, Perfessor!”
Shego and Kim looked over his shoulder. Professor Dementor, still wearing his mask like Shego said, was dressed in - “A tuxedo?” Kim asked, surprised.
“Where's Double-Oh Zero going?” Shego asked.
“Let's find out.”
Their destination was downtown Boston in the arts district. They parked their rental car in the same lot that Dementor used and surreptitiously followed him down the street. He bought a bouquet of flowers from a street vendor along the way.
“You don't think he's going out on a date, do you?” Ron whispered.
“Eww,” Kim and Shego agreed.
“Short, dark, and ugly,” Shego added.
Dementor suddenly opened the door to a building up ahead and went inside. Kim and the others peered inside once they caught up.
“The theater?” Kim asked dubiously as Dementor handed his ticket over.
“Swan Lake,” Shego said, spotting a poster. “This is turning surreal. Maybe that's why he's wearing a mask. He's playing the Phantom of the Opera.”
“Should we wait outside or follow him in?” Ron asked.
“We could always go back and break into his apartment,” Shego replied.
“We're not going to break the law,” Kim said firmly. “And he must be meeting someone. Maybe it's connected to the theft.”
“Yeah, well, we're going to need to buy tickets,” Shego pointed out, “and I'm a little strapped for cash.”
Kim glanced at Ron.
“Don't look at me,” he said.
She grimaced. “I hope Dad won't have a fit when he sees the credit-card bill,” she sighed.
Their seats weren't exactly the best in the house. But when they spotted Professor Dementor, thanks to the mask that covered his whole head, they saw he was seated in the front row. There were people seated to either side of him, but he gave no sign of knowing either one.
“Great,” Kim said. “It looks like he's just a fan of the arts.”
“Oh well,” Ron said, getting up to leave.
Kim grabbed him by the wrist. “Where do you think you're going?”
“It's the ballet, Kim,” he reminded her. “It lacks the entertainment value of pro wrestling.”
“I paid seventy bucks for your ticket,” she hissed at him, “and all three of us are going to sit here and enjoy it. So sit down, expand your horizons, and be quiet.”
Ron cringed as he sat down.
“I need to use the ladies’ room,” Shego said.
Kim glared at her, and Shego grumbled before sitting again.
Meanwhile, as the curtain rose and the ballet started, Ron had his nose buried in the playbill. His eyes widened. “Kim.”
“Not now, Ron,” Kim whispered. At least she could relax and enjoy the show.
“Kim!”
“We are not leaving!” she growled.
He tugged on her arm. “This is important.”
“Ron… “ she began to say when someone who'd appeared on stage caught her attention. Her eyes widened.
Ron grabbed her head and forcibly turned her eyes to look at the pamphlet in his hand.
According to the playbill, the lead role in tonight's production would be performed by Bonnie Rockwaller.
To be continued…