Wade swallowed nervously as he shipped the package to the Possible residence then returned to his bedroom and the display linked to the Kimmunicator, “It’s on its way Mrs. Dr. Possible. Did Kim say what she needed it for? Or did she mention how many more times she expected to be replacing these?” He was curious but asking this particular Possible questions was a razors edge game that the woman liked playing … while drawing blood to make her points. At this point however, the challenge was worth the risk, he was bored. Without the constant test of his skills working with an active Kim provided he was rapidly running out of ways to keep himself occupied so he didn’t really mind having to build thirty of the multi-spectrum scanner/translators. Kim hadn’t dealt directly with him which left him dodging her mother and he was learning that the mother was probably the more dangerous of the two, Kim would break bones or do bodily harm at best … at worst she would thrash his room and system. Mrs. P. she got the brain tweak fear worked to full affect and she knew it, meaning it would not matter if he had a room or a system left to return to she would only leave enough of his brain in place to keep him drooling for the rest of his life. Well at least he wasn’t bored anymore.
“Who said it was for Kimmie, Don’t mention it to her either Please and thank you.” Before he could say another word she turned the Kimmunicator off and set it back in the crate of items Kim had sitting outside of her room smiling happily as she waited for the delivery man to show up. Kim spent most of the morning completely rearranging her room, her brothers found themselves forced at Kimminator point into helping her with the heavier stuff. Since the heaviest thing in the room was her bed frame she only had to crack the whip for a few minutes before they had it where she wanted it, for the time being. She hoped the boys could be volunteered to distract the Kimminator and knew it would not come cheap. Letting them cook with liquid nitrogen again might be doable, the kitchen was finally upgraded to the new thermal protection system James repurposed from the abandoned X project he refused to discuss. Before she could track down the hellions she called her boys the doorbell rang, her package was there which meant she would not torture Wade for a week, as promised. “I’ll get it.” She could not let Kimmie get there first or she’d be busted.
“I know that look honey. Can I get the bandages now or are you going to make me wait?” James Possible knew that when his wife had that look in her eyes she was being devious. Her moments of deviation truly petrified him as no other force he experienced could. Under the current circumstances he was guessing the target for her deviation was Kim which meant the males of the house were faced with mortal danger. The males would admit freely however that they deserved these moments as they themselves tended to cause an equal share of damage. Insurance agents had the Possible residence and all buildings within a mile declared perpetual natural disaster areas and refused any further claim. The government wasn’t so fortunate since they had to cover FEMA who had to answer for both adult Possibles who were the ranking figures in their respective fields, their daughter who was regularly saving their backside and if the twins were upset, they had a special manual just for that. When the Possible family finaly moved he figured the government would use the mountain top house for a nuclear test or something just to remove the memory.
Mrs. Possible kissed her husbands cheek playfully as she joined him on the couch, the remote was seized tv shut off and locked. “I need a distraction, now I know you don’t won’t to but unless you can think of something the boys will take for the job it falls on you. The eyebrow is growing back nicely by the way.” She loved it when she made that eye twitch like that. “We’ll need to hold off until we can give them a good head start on their escape though.” His eye twitched for a few minutes over that one and it was all she could do not to laugh. “The boys will be in hiding at least until tomorrow night so it’ll have to be then, you do agree with me don’t you?”
“I can get a case of that rocket fuel you told us we could not have … ever.” If he was going to have to barter for his life with his wife she would have to negotiate. “It will take something like that to get them to even consider it and we may need to alert the national guard.” If the twins were even going to consider this they would demand they get immunity from parental prosecution and at least a week on the run. They wouldn’t be foolish enough to think they or any force of nature could stop Kim from having her revenge. He could see his wifes blue eyes drop into a very dangerous mode, there was no doubt in his mind where Kim got her spirit, and her ruthless shark like focus. “Honey your scaring me again.”
“There is another option, it even scares me though.” There was that twitch again, she leaned over and snuggled close, “Have you tried any of that coco-moo stuff we keep getting?” She knew he had two of the cases they had received stashed in his power recliner. “I know I know but this is ‘drastic times call for stupid ideas’ serious. They won’t settle for rocket fuel anymore, they got their license to make the stuff last week remember?” He shuddered for a minute over that. “You are absolutely right they will need time to escape. Yes we told them never again but like I said ‘stupid idea’ So?” She was willing to take the chance, she expected her sons to have plans for this exact situation tucked away in their vault, they had plans for just about every other kind of lunatic plot after all.
Shego chuckled as she watched Kim go through her stances, she had to concede after the second time she tried to get in some practice Kim managed to make it from start to finish flawlessly. She could see the fingerboard and remains of her optical mice, each of which was tied through the holes she punched through each of the target points on the top half of the shattered board. She wasn’t going to bother asking where the dvd player was smoldering, the longer she watched the more terrifyingly beautiful the carnage became. The train wreck analogies were, undeniable, even if you wanted to look away you just couldn’t do it. ‘Hey Pumkin, Nice panties didja get them at the party shop on the loop?’ Perhaps she shouldn’t have said that as Kim was getting out of her sweatshirt, it was now sweatrags, unless Kim was okay with sewing zippers in front and back, Shego would probably opt for buttons or velcro. She watched as Kim raged silently in place and violently removed the remainder of the sweatshirt. Something shiny fell across the field of view she had through the binoculars, a quick twist of the focal adjuster slide and she was looking at some kind of mechanical insect latched onto Kims bra. Big sucker at that, which was unfortunate for Kim because she panicked and in the process flung the bug off. It took the bra along for the ride before meeting a short brutal demise that threw off lots of pretty sparks.
She thought Kim was over the worste of it, she was wrong, horribly wrong. Shego watched as Kims fists clenched and she stood upright, she was blushing head to toe, it was easy to tell because the sweatshirt she was removing was the last thing she needed to get out of before she would have pitched her robe on and went for the shower. That was when she saw the most beautiful face she had ever looked upon, there was an avenging fire burning so bright in Kims eyes Shego swore she was looking into the eyes of an angel of chaos as the redhead looked up from the wreckage of whatever it had been. She could tell Kim was screaming at the top of her lungs at this point because the window was vibrating so much she couldn’t focus on Kim. An instant later Kim was nowhere to be seen, there was a flash and all the houselights came on, she could hear the air raid siren going off quite clearly. Movement in the kitchen caught her eye and she saw Kims younger brothers race in from the near end of the kitchen and disappear into the dining area, then she saw Kim careening through the kitchen apparently in hot pursuit. She winced as Kims sock clad feet found no purchase in the kitchen and the sliding redhead took out a section of the funny tiles Mr. Possible had been putting up as well as that stupid potted plant they had in there.
There was another flash up in front of the Possible house and Shego could see the twins rocket off into the night, literally. A large blurry white object caught her attention and she nearly fell out of the window when she focused on it. Mrs. Possible was just catching up to a nearly naked Kim who was taking pop shots at the fleeing twins, with her lipstick laser. ‘Note to self, don’t piss her off that bad. Like Ever.’ Of course, she knew if Kim had really been serious, they would never have made it off the ground.
Mrs. Possible was glad she had a smart husband, the boys went off a bit prematurely so it saved the parents the bother of having to bribe them, they would have to offer some form of pacifier to Kim however or she might try her cryogenics experiment on them for the science exam. While she kept Kim from further embarrassment and a cold, James worked his technological wizardry and wired the new translator gadget into Kims old unit and the games could begin. She heard the phone ring and used that as a distraction for Kim who, still fuming, reached across the couch and retrieved the handset for her. It turned out to be a good thing that Kim hadn’t answered as she heard Rons voice ‘Mrs. Dr. P? this is Rons embassy we have … refugees who need assistance.’ She could have kissed the boy. “I give you full authorization, they’ll need at least a week to recover.” Without another word she shut the phone off, smiled far too happily for Kims taste, and stood to go to the kitchen. “Wait right there Kimmie-cub. I’ve got something for you.” Five minutes later she returned with a steaming mug and one of the candy canes dad kept everywhere during the holidays.
Kim sipped the mead and smiled happily for a minute as she realized the mother unit was fighting with firepower. She was considerably more composed than she had been a few minutes ago and she was definitely thankful that Shego was the closest of their neighbors at about a mile away. It made her sitting there in little more than a bed sheet bearable, the tweebs would sooo not be allowed to escape her though. The mead and candy only helped her cope with the sitch without resorting to explosive reactions. She should have realized her mother would be on the ball, she should have checked her for cameras. She had no defense when the camera went off three times and left her blinded. She very nearly preferred to remain blinded once she realized that she had likely dropped the sheet trying to shield he eyes.
Some time later Mrs. Possible sat down on the floor and leaned against the bed. She wanted to make sure she had the thing working right so she could confirm her suspicions at the first opportunity. It came as a pleasant surprise that she would get the chance to verify both sides on the first night. It wasnt five minutes after she turned the machine on and began checking the manual before Kim fired off the first burst of code. ‘Good Night Shego.’ She waited for a response but nothing happened, figuring Kim would either keep watching or go on to bed she went back to reading the manual, she had been going over it for nearly an hour when she saw the message come across the translator. ‘Good night Princess, sweet dreams’ When things got complicated for this family it never did so in subtle methods, she noted. She waited for another half hour patiently reading the entire manual and making sure she was using it correctly before calling it a night, she would have a full day at the hospital but it was her last of the year unless an emergency came up. The hospital was demanding she take at least an extra week of her vacation time or she would lose it.
She enjoyed a nice long shower after her shift ended and she was dropped off at home, off all the things she enjoyed about her seniority with the hospital the prioritized order of vanpool dropoffs rated her favorite. She lived the furthest out so she had plenty of company for the trip. Onerously the scanner was not picking up anything, which had Mrs. Possible worried, Kim had been home alone all day and the house was still intact. She went through her remaining paperwork, smiled and kissed her husband goodnight as he crawled under the covers beside her and switched to her reading lamp long before she caught sign of the first communication. It was time to be nosy for Kims own good. She held the small display in her hand and got comfortable then turned off her lamp. Covert work felt better in the dark.
'Kimmie dammit! Are you cheating on me? I thought I was the only one you went for that hard (sniffle, sob).'
'What the fuck are you talking about Shego?'
'Was that you yesterday or just your kid-brothers?'
'Well err … ok fine … both but mostly me … ok ok all me but dammit they started it. stupid camfly'
'Camfly?'
'Don’t ask just don’t.'
'I think I saw it, ever thought about career as a stripper'
'…'
'You know Princess, I was one once for a night … As you say, don’t ask just … don’t.'
’…'
'Moving on now Shego, they do this more often than me, at home anyway. I don't bring my fights here. Sure sometimes the fights, yeah they come here but there’s not much I can do about that.'
'I could see the family resemblance though, especially with how you wrecked that wall. Didn't it hurt?'
'Nope the wall didn’t feel a thing … the ficus I’m not so sure'
'Is that coming from your allowance? I could give you a bit of loan … if you ask nicely'
'Don’t you already owe me for the finger board and lets see … what it is three mice now? the lamp the dvd player a set of pompoms … yeah the pompoms I will so not allow you to forget …'
'Not to mention that shirt you ripped when I mentioned your panties… very cute blush, BTW.'
Mrs. Possible couldnt help but snicker as she read the transcriptor, that explained the random sounds of mayhem emanating from the loft.
’…'
'Awww, did Kimmie run out of green *again*?'
Mrs Possible wasn’t sure how she ended up on the floor but she still had the transcript display in her hands, torn between wanting to wash Kims mouth out with soap dieing from laughter, Shego was a true southern smartass and Kimmie needed to not spend so much time with those Navy types.
’… can really see why your mother calls you bubble-but, it's almost as cute as mine… are you trying to combust in there?'
'Shit I wasn't being literal Kim! Don't you have a fire extinguisher or something?'
James Possible never liked to be woken by the feet of his wife running over him as she leapt at the door, it happened more often than he cared to admit but when he heard her asking if the fire extinguisher was in the kitchen or the twins room, that got his attention.
The next evening Shego was a touch repentant for the merciless teasing she had been serving her red headed rival, the fire department was rarely called to put her room out. ‘Yeah Princess, You know I understand completely why insurance agents refuse to come out here now.’ Kims outline in the kitchen didn’t respond, ‘Ok look …’ She paused unsure of exactly what to say to the shadow she could see in the kitchen. She really hated the way the Possibles house was arranged, the backside she could see was often brightly lit or completely dark making it hard for her to make out more than shape and shadow. The kitchen where Kim appeared to be was only barely backlit by the light from the Possibles family room. ‘You know Possible I bet you like seeing me squirm.’ Shit why did I say that?
Mrs. Possible choked on her coffee as she read Shegos statement, oh this was going to be fun. ‘Yes, I like to see you squirm, it's really cute, and yes, I really think your butt is very, very cute, really perky too. Now lets discuss how much the wardrobe bill will be and how exactly you will be making the payments … I prefer cash but your bank account number should cover it'
'You really think my butt is … cute? … Wait wait hold up what’s this about my bank account Princess?'
Mrs Possible grinned happily as she let the laser scalpel power down.
'You know Kimmie, you're really stunning when you get real mad…'
'Say what?'
'When you went after the tweebs yeah … absolutely gorgeous!'
’…'
'Awww, don't worry, you're cute when you blush too…'
‘Err … gotta go!’ Mrs Possible panicked, this changed everything she was glad the kitchen was dark enough for her to retreat into without drawing her daughters attention.
“Oh-kay, that was… unexpected…” Shego turned slowly and wandered almost absently deeper in her house. She was almost disappointed in Kims reaction, it didn’t really seem like Kim to run away from their banter, if she had broke the window or set something else on fire that would have been less scary. After few moments of aimless drifting she found herself in her bedroom and before the covered canvas. Hesitant hands pulled the cloth from over half-finished painting and she regarded it blinking slowly. After several minutes of standing there totally unmoving and unthinking Shego was stirred from her near-trance by a nudge on her knees. A pair of green, glowing eyes met a pair of feline others. “I … think … that Kim is starting to grow up …” A few moments of silence and Shegos eyes returned to the painting. A few hours later she was wiping a paint smudged hand across an equally paint smudged nose, she felt she almost had the eyes right, once she got the eyes the way she wanted she knew the rest would just fall into place. When she felt the more insistant nudge at her knee again she turned reached down and drug the tip of her brush across her kitties nose, it was a safe water based paint but the cat just knew it was cold wet and sticky. After the sneeze Shego made a note to never do that again. Never ever ever ever again. She was mostly glad she had the foresight to put the cloth down when she turned to deface her furry companion, who now had a near dayglo green spray pattern off his nose. Most of the spray was on her.
Mrs. Possible felt her heart thudding against her breastbone as she zipped back and forth across the bathroom, ‘Shego was not flirting with me she was flirting with ‘Kim’ Shego was not flirting with ‘me’ she was flirting with Kim, shitshithshit. Kimmiecub you sure can pick’m’ She felt her heart actually pause for a moment as that sank in. “Oh shit.”