My mistress has been acting weird since I came back about a week ago. She’s been…well…making my job harder.
Being together was not as easy as the reunited pet and master liked to pretend it was. Shego was too stubborn and prideful to admit to being a bit uncomfortable with her little pest. She did not see why she should be uneasy around the girl; after all, Kim was her girl and she would always be that. She owned that runt no matter what, she continued to tell herself so, but it seemed like something inside of her was not buying it. She was going to prove it to herself somehow that Kim was nothing more than a pet.
Kim had a bit of trouble easing into her role as pet. She had what she wanted, a chance to be with Shego again, so she thought that she would be happy. She only came to realize that she desired to be more than a pet to Shego. Sure, being her pet was an extremely important job, but it was still a sort of lowly position. It did not seem that way the first time, though.
“Maybe I’m just thinking too hard on this subject. I mean, I just got here and everything. I doubt that I should just be able to jump right into this, right? I didn’t think about this as much the first time around. I just went with it and enjoyed the feeling of being close to my master. I liked bringing her joy, making her happy. I need to just do that again because that is the important thing. Making her happy made me happy is the important thing. I know this is pretty much the only way she’ll let me be with her right now. I want to be near her, so I just need to straighten out my act. I need to be happy again being Princess or Pumpkin,” Kim told herself; she was resting in her loft.
The redhead had been home for a few days now and she had been a fairly good pet in her opinion. She came when beaconed and was content to be caressed by her owner. She followed all of the old rules, even though many of them were created when she was thought to be stupider than a washcloth. So, she did not touch the stove, she did not eat after ten, and most of all, she did not sleep in her mistress’ bed; not that she did not want to crawl in bed with the woman. After all, she was a naughty pet more often than not. It was just that she could not hop back into the role like she thought that she would be able to and she knew the reason for that.
It was Shego. Kim noticed that Shego was not ready or prepared to be the all-powerful, outright commanding mistress that she was the first time around. She guessed that even though Shego wanted to act like she did not care that Kim Possible was her pet, she must have minded. It seemed to bother the elder woman. Kim wondered what that might mean.
The redhead did like to cling to the belief that Shego might be willing and able to accept her as more than pet on the second go-round. She might be able to accept that she liked Kim and she liked that the girl tried to bring her happiness, that the girl did bring her peace of mind. In Kim’s mind that would show that she had finally beaten that jackass Drakken. If that was the case, then she would have to steal a line from Ron and merrily declare a “boo-yah” right in the cerulean doctor’s face.
Unfortunately, Kim knew that was not the case. She knew that it would take a lot for her to defeat Drakken and win the heart and time of her owner; it would definitely take a lot of time and effort on the redhead’s part. She was in the lead as far as she could tell, but it still felt like she was losing big time because that blue dolt was still in her mistress’ life.
Kim decided to just stop thinking about it. She was aware that thinking about would not do her any good. Everything in her mind at the moment depended on her keeper. She decided to leave things in the hands of her keeper. She had faith that eventually her master would do what was in the best interest of all the parties involved; after all, Shego hated when something got too annoying and eventually what was going on had to get too annoying. Well, that was what Kim thought anyway.
(New day)
Shego came into the apartment, slamming the door very hard in case her pet was sleeping on the sofa; she thought that it would be entertaining to wake the girl up with a loud noise. Kim stuck her head out of her loft space, showing that she was not startled, nor was she sleeping. She had anticipated her keeper’s return, but she did not have it in her to go hug Shego the second that she stepped through the door. Why was it so hard to act like Princess/ Pumpkin the second time around, a voice asked in the back of Kim’s mind.
“What’s the bag?” Kim asked curiously when noticed that the elder woman was holding a black plastic bag.
“Nothing,” Shego answered while tossing the bag onto the sofa and she could tell that her little monster was about charge right for the bag. “Don’t touch it,” the pale woman ordered without turning around to face the redhead.
“Why not?” Kim pouted. She could not touch anything, her mind lamented. She could not touch the stove, she could not touch the bag, and she could not touch her mistress without permission. So many rules!
“Because I said so,” the green-skinned female declared before walking off to get settled into her home.
Kim sighed and nodded to show that she understood; at least her mistress was acting more like she used to. She wondered what was in the bag, though. Well, since her owner was acting more like she used to, the redhead figured that she could act more like she used to. She considered that she could sneak a glimpse into the bag and see what was inside without being found out. She bet that it was something for her, so she should check it out. It sounded like a solid plan, she decided.
The young woman climbed down from her loft and made a beeline right for the bag. She picked the plastic container up and looked around, just in case the woman-in-charge showed up out of nowhere. She smiled when she figured that she was about to get away with something.
“You just don’t listen,” Shego commented from the entrance to the living room. She was leaning against the wall.
“Damn it,” Kim muttered at being busted. Why could she not get away with something just once while under Shego’s roof, she wondered with a pout.
“Yeah, damn it indeed. What the hell did I just tell you?” the pale woman demanded to know.
“Not to touch it,” the girl answered while making sure to appear rather dejected, which had no affect on her mistress.
“And what are you doing?” Shego asked while approaching her pet.
“Touching it,” Kim offered enthusiastically, which earned her a hit in the head with a thin, rolled up magazine. “Ow!” she complained, even though the hit did not hurt at all. She rubbed the top of her head as if it was sore, though. Getting hit with something rolled up was new, she noted.
“Give it to me,” the master commanded.
The redhead pouted again while handing over the bag. Shego snatched the bag away and went back to her room. Kim could not help feeling as if she had been set up and she had gone for it like a fish to bait.
The redhead marched back up to her loft, which was begging to be cluttered again like it used to be, at least in her opinion. She guessed that she would have to give that time like everything else. Her space looked so empty to her olive green eyes because it only had her thin mattress and covers along with a couple of cuddle buddies. She had a small dresser to keep her clothes, but none of her books.
“Pumpkin,” Shego called after a few minutes.
“Yes?” Kim answered.
“Did you take a shower yet?”
“Nope.”
“So…how about you take a bath and I’ll shampoo your hair in the tub,” the pale woman proposed.
“Yeah?” Kim asked in a surprised tone. They used to do things like that all the time, but had not done that since she returned.
“And clip your nails,” Shego added.
“Totally spanking,” the girl agreed.
Kim leaped down from her space and took her mistress up on her offer with a grin. It seemed like Shego was doing her best to get Kim back into the swing of things. After a bath, a shampooing, and having her nails clipped, they settled in the living room. They watched television while Shego brushed Kim’s soft hair. The girl sighed, a very content sound; Shego made being a pet just about the closest thing to heaven on Earth, the eccentric hero thought.
“So, what’s the bag? More cat ears? I’ve still got the old ones,” Kim reported.
“You do?” the emerald-eyed woman asked, slightly surprised.
“Yeah, I kept them because I kept wearing them,” the redhead replied with a cute, small smile. She did wear the costume cat ears often, liking that they garnered attention and Monique believed them to be a great push in fashion.
Shego only shook her head; Kim certainly seemed like the scatter-brained pet that she recalled. She considered that it might be wrong to think of the girl as scatter-brained just because she liked getting attention from her owner, making her a happy pet. Kim was a pet and pets were supposed to like it when their masters paid them mind, Shego reminded herself.
“So, can we open the bag now?” the redhead requested.
“When I’m done grooming you,” Shego answered.
Kim puffed out her cheeks to show her annoyance; it was so much easier to play the spoiled pet when her owner was acting not only like she was the one in complete charge, but acted like Kim was just a pet. Shego ignored her little pest, recollecting that her brat was very spoiled. She was going to work on showing that she was the dominate force in the house, even though she remembered that Kim liked to challenge her authority with whining, tantrums, pouting, and other weapons to get her way. The redhead was going to be just a pet again in Shego’s mind no matter what, the pale woman promised herself because that was all Kim was.
“All right,” the elder woman said as she put down the brush. The redhead thought that her hair benefited greatly from being a pet because Shego took terrific care of her red-orange mane.
“We can open the bag now?” Kim asked eagerly. She was sincerely curious about the contents of the mysterious container. Only being around Shego could make her act the way that she was at the moment.
“Yes, we can open the damn bag now,” Shego sighed. She had forgotten how irksome her little monster could be with all her damnable energy.
Shego grabbed the bag while Kim turned around with a huge smile plastered on her face. Sometimes, even Kim was amazed by the feelings that flowed through her while she was in Shego’s presence. She was not usually so gleeful, but she found that her mistress made her that way and she had to manifest it or she was certain that she would burst.
“Okay, first, we’ve got treats,” Shego informed her pet as she pulled out a box of Kim’s favorite butter cookies. The redhead reached for them immediately, but the green-skinned woman held them out of her range.
“I’ve got to do tricks for those, don’t I?” Kim guessed.
“Of course.”
“Okay!” Kim saluted, ready to do some pet tricks for some cookies.
“Roll over,” Shego commanded.
Kim made a face, like she was insulted by the simple trick. She rolled over while Shego shook her head because of the face that her pet had the nerve to make. Kim righted herself and waited for her next command.
“Play dead,” the pale woman ordered.
Kim smiled and clutched her heart. She tipped over in a very melodramatic fashion to show that she was very “dead.” After a couple of seconds, she sat back up and faced her mistress again.
“Sit,” Shego said and Kim sat right in front of her. “And, speak,” the pale woman added.
“Woof,” the redhead said with confidence.
“Good girl,” Shego said while rubbing the head of her obedient pet. She then handed the girl one cookie.
“Just one?” Kim asked in disbelief.
“Yes.”
“That is ferociously wrong. I did four tricks and I did them good. I should get four cookies,” the redhead argued.
“You’ll get what I give you and like it,” the master declared. She was the one in charge, after all. Her word was law in the house.
Kim pouted. Shego then tossed the bag at her sulking runt for Kim to look through it. The girl dumped the contents out of the bag and noticed two items instantaneously. They looked like chokers, but upon closer inspection they appear to be collars. They were nice collars, but collars nonetheless. There was a grass green one with a heart-shaped tag hanging from it that read “Princess.” Then there was a black one with an oval-shaped tag with the label “Pumpkin.” And then she saw a long, grass green leash. She looked up at her mistress.
“Dog collars?” Kim asked. She knew that she was a pet and she understood that. Was it necessary for her to wear a collar?
“Pet collars. You are a pet, after all. I want you to wear one of those at all times. We’re going to go for a walk tomorrow. Maybe even play a little Frisbee in the park,” the pale woman replied. She was more than aware of what Kim was to her if the girl was wearing a collar and on a leash.
Kim did not know if she should cheer or not. She liked going outside with her master like any other pet would, but she would more than likely have to go out on a leash like any other pet would. Her mistress was becoming a sadist, she thought with another pout. She was probably going to have to catch the Frisbee in her mouth like a dog too, she thought sullenly. She wished that she was a house cat; it would be less embarrassing to be a house cat. She hoped that they worked their way back to the routine where she only had to hold Shego’s hand when they left the house; that was back at a time when Shego was certain that if she let her pet out of her sight, the girl would somehow get killed.
(New day)
Shego walked Kim to the park on her leash. She noted that her girl did not look humiliated at all. Shego could only wonder why that was. She never knew what was going on in that girl’s obviously mixed-up head.
Kim had decided if her being on a leash made Shego happy and did not hurt her in any way, then she was all right with it. She did hope that it was just a once-in-a-while sort of thing. She also tried to calculate the odds of running into someone that she knew because in her current situation, it would certainly make for an awkward moment; she hoped that the universe was not looking to be funny that day.
“All right, let’s let you go, so you can catch this stupid ass Frisbee without tripping,” Shego commented and she unclipped the leash from the redhead’s collar. Kim was wearing the collar that advertised her as “Pumpkin” that day.
“Should I do some stretching first?” the girl joked.
“Go get it,” the raven-haired woman commanded as she flung the toy disk with all of her might, just like she used to do.
Kim charged off without further comment, going after the Frisbee with the same zeal as she used to do. She actually could not recall the last time that she and Shego played Frisbee. She probably would never tell anybody, but she really found the activity fun, especially since it got on Shego’s nerves. Frisbee was one thing that Kim knew actually irked her mistress, but it was not a stressful type of annoyance.
The pair got into the Frisbee routine as if they played it just last week. Kim was confident that she and her mistress would be all right just for a few minutes of playtime. They would be just as they were before, which was fine by the redhead for now because she wanted to be near Shego any way that she could.
“Why the hell does she still like this dumb ass activity?” the pale woman wondered as she waited for her pet to bring back the flying disk.
She could not figure out what her girl saw in running around for a plastic circle that she did not even get to throw back; Kim merely found the Frisbee and then ran about to Shego to return the toy to her mistress’ hand. She had to stop thinking about the idiotic pet of hers and trying to understand what happened in that girl’s brain, she told herself because she was certain that she would never comprehend the little do-gooder.
Kim went hunting for the Frisbee; her mistress had flung that thing really good right into some bushes. She usually found the toy within a couple of minutes, but was not so lucky at the moment. She then stopped looking for the plastic disk when she came face to face with a trio that she really did not wish to see ever again.
“You guys,” Kim gasped as she stood before Team Impossible. Why the hell were they in the park, her brain asked her as if she had the answer to that.
“You again,” Dash Damond huffed when he took noticed of the girl. He saw sick of seeing the little busybody redhead.
Kim noted that the team was in street clothes. Did they take days off? She had no idea and she really did not want to bother with asking. She hoped that if they did take days off then that meant they would not chase her for once.
“Um…bye,” the girl bid them farewell. She was not looking to try her luck. Hey, it seemed like the universe was trying to make a joke at her expense and she really had little desire to be a punch line.
The redheaded hero ran off, much to the dismay of the trio. They had experience in chasing after her and it was not fun, but they had to catch her and teach her a lesson so she could learn to keep out of their affairs. They took off after her.
Kim looked back just to make sure that they were running after her and she was not sprinting in vain. They were after her, which she expected them to be. Why were they always hounding her? She never did anything to them. They did not have a monopoly on helping people after all; well, as far as she knew, they did not, but they seemed to think otherwise. If they did have saving people on lock, she had not gotten the memo. She bolted right to Shego without thinking and hid behind her like a frightened puppy would.
“Where’s the fucking thing?” Shego asked.
“I couldn’t find it,” Kim answered.
“Then what the hell are you doing back here?”
“Trying not to get hurt by them,” the redhead answered while pointing at the approaching triad of muscular men. Shego frowned at the team as they walked up to her; she bet that they were about to prove that steroids blocked oxygen to the brain and they could not think properly. The trio stopped in front of the emerald-eyed female.
“What the hell do you want?” Shego asked.
“Give us the girl,” Dash demanded.
“What the hell for?”
“That’s none of your concern,” he replied.
“I’m making it my fucking concern, jackass. This is the second time I’ve seen you fucking pricks chasing her. What the hell did she do?” the woman demanded to know. She recalled that the last time that she saw them chasing her pet, they had the nerve to claim that Kim broke the law. What a crotch, she thought now because she knew what kind of person her little pest was.
Shego had been curious for a long while about that night that she saw Team Impossible pursuing her pet. What had the little monster done to them? She doubted that it was anything major because she was all too aware that they had a tendency to be very go-hard assholes.
“We don’t like her hanging around in the city that we live in. She’s just going to do her usual vigilantly act and eventually get hurt,” Dash explained.
“Don’t act like you’re being compassionate. You guys got me beaten up and then you drugged me up and abandoned me in a box. I’ve never been seriously hurt until I met you jerks,” Kim argued.
“Oh, these bastards are the ones that dumped you in my fucking life. I should kick their asses big time for that,” Shego remarked with a smirk.
“Would you?” Kim requested because she doubted that they would leave her alone unless they had a reason to stay away from her.
“No,” Shego answered bluntly. “Look, Team Testosterone, just leave her alone. She’s only a kid. Just because you guys have a federal grant to catch crimes and fight crime and shit doesn’t give you the right to try and squeeze her out of the business. Why don’t you go somewhere and have your two boyfriends shine your fucking head?” the pale woman commented, looking directly at Dash.
“Hey, I can have your badge pulled, officer,” the bald man threatened Shego, or at least he thought that he was threatening her. She was rather infamous around town, being a malcontent special officer and everything. There was always a rumor going around that she was just one incident away from being fired.
“I can shove my badge up your ass if you like, but knowing you jerk-offs, you’d probably enjoy it,” she retorted with a sinister smirk. She thought that she could learn to hate these bastards if given enough time and dialogue because she seriously did not have the patience for their crap. She knew that they were arrogant and pushy, but they were pushing the wrong person.
“You’d better watch it,” Crash warned the green-skinned female.
“Or else what? You’ll cry?” she asked.
“Just hand her over,” Burn ordered.
“You guys want this girl? Are you sure that’s what you want?” Shego asked with half a smile. Today was about to get so much less boring.
“Give her up,” the huge redheaded man commanded.
“Fine, you guys can have the girl,” Shego conceded and she threw her hands up to show that she gave up.
“What?” Kim inquired. Had her mistress lost her mind? Her mistress was supposed to protect her, right? An owner was supposed to make sure that her pet was safe and secure, not just give her away to people that would certainly do the pet harm, right?
“Sure, they can have you, Princess. It is what they went, after all. They are the big, bad heroes. Why deny the idiots what they want?” Shego asked with a devilish smirk on her face, hoping that her girl would get the idea.
“But, they’re on the same side as the good guys…sort of,” Kim argued. She got what her mistress wanted her to do, but it was kind of against her nature to do such a thing.
“Well, if you want dessert tonight, you’ll get them,” Shego replied.
Next time: See what happens to Team Impossible and Kim gets a pet. Yes, Kim gets a pet. What kind of pet does a pet get and what does a pet do with a pet?