I could die a million times, a million different ways and I know the pain I’m feeling now would still be far worse than anything else. It’s like I’m being gutted every second of every minute while being bleed dry. How could one person have this affect on me? Why do I need her so badly?
“Isn’t that a bit dangerous?” Monique asked as she stepped out onto the balcony of the apartment that she shared with Felix. She sounded more amused than concerned since she was talking to the woman that could do anything.
Kim was parked on the railing and they were on the sixth floor. The sky was grey and it was clear that it was going to storm at some point sooner or later. The hero was just staring off into the distance, not focusing on anything in particular.
“Only for idiots,” Kim replied with a forced smile.
The redhead had been forcing her smiles for days now and it was easy to tell that even doing that was a struggle for her. She was just trying to make things easier on the people around her; she was not looking to bring down anyone’s mood. She did look better now than she did last week, which was the last time that Monique saw her. The chocolate-eyed young woman guessed that her friend had come back for want of a sofa to sleep on.
“So, you’re not going home?” the African-American female figured since Kim was back at her place.
Monique had been wondering what her good friend was going to do with herself now that she was homeless. She believed that the slender hero should just go back home and when she said home, she meant back to Shego. She was fairly certain that Shego had to miss the olive-eyed young woman by now and she would at least talk things out with Kim by now more than likely.
“Well, I guess I’ll have to sometime. Not that I can think of anything that I have there that I really want,” Kim answered. Actually, she just did not want to return to that place. Would any person in her right mind want to return to the place that she felt she was pretty brutally murdered? She truly felt like Shego had executed her.
“You might at least want your clothes back. I’ve seen your gear and it is the ‘nuffness,” Monique commented.
“It’s more hers than mine anyway. She bought most of it.”
“But, she gave it to you. Besides, it’s not like she can fit it and she’s probably not going to be getting another pet that can fit it,” the wavy-haired girl reasoned.
“Fine, I’ll go get my gear. Are you trying to kick me out?” the redhead asked.
“Of course not. Why would I kick out my girl, especially in her time of need? Just helping you move along. It’s not like you’re going to stay long anyway,” Monique answered.
“I don’t want to get in the way,” the hero replied. She never stayed long because she did not want to be in anyone’s way or wear out her welcome.
“Yeah, I know how you are, girl. I don’t mind how you are either. I don’t mind having you around. I’m just trying to help you out.”
“Yeah, I know. I’ll get going and see what I can grab. See you later,” Kim said and she hopped off of the railing onto the balcony.
“When you say ‘later,’ can you give me a rough estimate? Today? Tonight? Tomorrow? A few days from now? Just so I know when to order out for three,” Monique teased with half a smile, trying to lift her girl’s spirits.
“You’re so full of jokes. Keep it up and I’ll put in a bad word for you with Felix. I’ll tell him that you tried to seduce me,” Kim remarked.
“Please, he would just tell me to try harder and then ask to watch if not join in if I ever succeed,” the chocolate-eyed female pointed out.
“You got me there,” the redhead yielded.
Shego threw on some clothes and decided to go outside for the first time in a week; she had been so depressed the past week and she had not even realized it. She had to go out and she had to get back what she wanted; she had to get back what was hers. She walked out of the door and, as soon as she stepped out into the street, the skies opened up. It began to pour down rain like it was the second flood.
“Shit,” the pale woman muttered.
Her luck just had to be damned; it was the only way to explain the life that she was having, Shego thought. Fine, if she had to go out in the pouring rain, then she would go search in the pouring rain. Hell, it could hail fire and brimstone and she would still be outside, she decided. Only one thing mattered to her and she did not care what stood in her way, she would get what she wanted.
Now, where was the first place that she should try, she wondered. The blonde boy’s house, she figured without much difficulty. She trotted off in that direction, thinking that it would be better to search on foot for various reasons. She got a couple of blocks away and found that searching on foot was the right call. Standing six feet away from her was just the person that she was looking for; had she jumped into her car, she would have missed the whole reason that she was outside getting drenched.
“Pumpkin,” Shego said.
Kim was standing right there, facing her, soaked to the bone. The redhead did not react to her pet name. Shego sighed; maybe her luck was not so very damned. She had found the young woman quickly and unharmed, which were good things. But, the girl was not responding to her, only staring at her with glass-like green eyes. Her olive eyes showed nothing at the moment.
“Come on home, out of the rain,” she said to her pet, who still did not reply. “Come on,” Shego urged the girl.
“I don’t want you to marry Drakken,” Kim blurted out. She had not planned on saying that, but it was the only thing that she could say now that she was facing her beloved master. She was trying her best to hold back the urge to break down and cry right in front of the woman that had practically ripped her heart right out of her chest.
“Come on,” Shego repeated and she took the younger woman by the hand.
The pale woman gently tugged the redhead back toward the apartment; Kim did not put up any resistance. She just did not have it in her to protest and she had been going home anyway. They entered the apartment and Shego took Kim’s drenched jacket off of her shoulders. She went and hung both of their jackets up in the bathroom to dry off. She returned to Kim, who remained standing in the hall as if she had never been in the apartment before, and the elder woman looked down at her girl. She was not too sure what she should say.
“Are you hungry? I could make some spaghetti,” Shego offered, trying to sound as normal as possible.
Kim wanted to scoff. Spaghetti, while a very powerful food, would not wipe away all of the gut-wrenching, absolute, excruciating agony that she was going through right now. Her entire being, everything that made up the creature that was Kim Possible, was totally, completely, and thoroughly injured. She might as well have been a pile of worthless ashes, she believed. It was like her whole being had been nuked and Shego had been the one that pushed the button to launch the killer missiles.
“I don’t want you to marry Drakken,” Kim repeated. She just could not think of anything else to say. She did not think that anything else mattered.
“I know,” Shego replied.
“I don’t want you to.”
“I know,” the green-skinned woman repeated.
The redhead threw herself on Shego and latched onto her. She began weeping uncontrollably on the older woman’s shoulder while chanting that she did not want the pale female to marry Drakken. The raven-haired woman just held her distraught pet and let her weep; she thought that the girl needed the release. She knew, of course, what her pet wanted. And she was fairly certain of what she wanted.
Shego sat up in bed that night. Her elf was curled up next to her, sleeping soundly. Kim seemed to be thoroughly worn out. Shego guessed that she had put the redhead through quite a bit. She did not mean to be so tough on her little monster. She was supposed to take care of Kim, after all. A master was supposed to take care of her pet, not put her pet through all sorts of trauma.
Kim did not deserve all of that distress that she put on her, Shego told herself. The girl had done nothing but be a loyal and loving pet and she had repaid that with such a hurtful ordeal. It was not right; hell, it was not even smart.
She remembered that she had called her pet stupid, but the truth of the matter was that Kim seemed to have it more together than she did, Shego realized. The slender redhead did what she did, not because she was forced into it or even felt pressure to do it now. Her pet did whatever she did because she wanted to do it. Kim did whatever put a smile on her face. She guessed that was why her girl always held that pixie-like twinkle in her eyes. Life had so many possibilities, and testing them out and not boxing herself in was what made Kim happy.
“I’ve got a lot to learn from you, huh?” Shego said in a whisper while eyeing the girl and then she lightly caressed the redhead’s slightly chubby cheek. “And I thought I was the teacher around these parts.”
Kim had not been very cooperative through out the night, not that Shego blamed her for her behavior. The green-skinned female had made spaghetti for dinner as she had offered to do, but her girl refused to eat any of it. She supposed that she should have expected as much from her visibly wounded pet. She believed that she was lucky that Kim had not just thrown the food on the floor.
The olive-eyed adventurer also refused to participate in any kind of small talk. She stared at her hands or feet for most of the evening. She was actually a little ashamed that she had cried right on the older woman after swearing to herself that she had given Shego the last of her tears days ago. She was also embarrassed to have said that she did not want the raven-haired female to marry Drakken. She wanted to think that she was over all of that, but as soon as she saw Shego, she knew that she was not over it and she doubted that she ever would be over it.
Kim did not even want to stay the night, but Shego refused to let her go back out into that typhoon-like weather. She did not have it in her to physically contest the pale woman, so the slim hero complied with the order somewhat. The only reason that Kim was sleeping in the bed next to her was because Shego carried her there after the petite adventurer fell asleep on the couch.
“Does she hate me now?” the emerald-eyed woman wondered. She would understand it if she was now the most detested thing in her monster’s life. She would understand it, but she damn sure would not accept it.
The pale woman paced her living room while waiting for her zero-hour to come, the moment of truth. Kim was still sleeping; she assumed that the redhead was dogged emotionally and that had completely tired her out. She would allow the girl to rest. It was all right to rest all she needed and wanted to now.
A knock at the door pulled Shego from her thoughts; the moment that she had been waiting for had arrived right on time. She answered it quickly to avoid having the noise disturb Kim; she really did not want anything at all to bother the girl or possibly wake her up. Drakken was standing outside and she ushered him in with a sweep of her hand. She shut the door behind him and led him to the dining room table. They both sat down.
“So, what did you want to talk about?” Drakken inquired. He had been surprised when she called him last night; she never called him. So, he was rather curious as to what brought on the honor of her phoning him.
“It’s about us,” Shego answered plainly.
“Us?” he echoed in a puzzled tone.
“Look, we’ve been together for a long time and you have grown on me, but I can’t do this anymore,” Shego kind of explained.
The blue doctor had grown on her, something akin to a fungus, she suspected. There was something about him that made her stay with him, endure him, but it just was not strong enough to make her continue on. There was no point to putting herself through it anymore. He was not the only person that would ever put up with her on a long term basis and she knew that for a fact.
“Do what?” he asked in a bemused tone.
“This.” The green-skinned woman motioned to the both of them and then she placed the ring that he had given her on the table between the two of them. She had been tempted to melt the ring, but she did not even have the energy to be malicious right now. Really, the only things that she wanted was for everything to be corrected and then to just move on; she had no desire to be mean.
“I don’t understand,” he replied while looking down at the ring and then looking back up at his girlfriend. His confusion was evident in his beady, black eyes.
“I bet you don’t, so I’ll make it real plain and extra simple. I’m not going to marry you. Believe it or not, I’m doing you a favor,” she informed him.
If she did marry Drakken, eventually she would just have to devour him because he would get on her nerves so much. And that was only if her parents or brothers did not kill him beforehand considering how much they disliked him; she would not put it passed any of them to slaughter him even during a “special occasion.” In other words, he would be lucky to live through the first week of marriage with her, so she was doing him a favor by not taking things that far.
“But, we agreed—” the scientist tried to argue.
“We didn’t agree on jack shit. You just assumed. You never asked me to marry you and I never actually said that I would. Besides, I don’t love you,” Shego confessed as if it was nothing and, to her, it was nothing, especially now.
She did not really believe in love in the romantic sense, but she understood that there was something that made one person put up with another person’s problems. She could not put up with Drakken. She had to force herself to tolerate him most of the time, but she knew that she would not be able to do that for the rest of her life.
Part of her even considered that the only reason that she could stomach Drakken was because she had her pet around. Her monster kept her calm and relaxed, putting her in the right frame of mind to tolerate someone like him over time. When it was just her and Drakken, though, those were the times that she could hardly stand him for a few seconds and those were the times that she had hit him.
She barely even cared about him when she sat down and thought about it. If Drakken went missing for days, she would not worry or even think about it. She would move on with her life. It was not that she was heartless, even though she liked to think that she was, but there was something about him that made her apathetic toward him in regards to most situations. She was indifferent toward him when she was not annoyed.
“Is there someone else? That Junior kid?” Drakken demanded to know.
The ocean-colored doctor doubted that he would ever forget how that muscular rich boy tried to work on Shego with all of his money and flirting. He thought that it was feasible that the kid had gotten to Shego since he knew that she liked money. So, he could imagine her leaving him to be with Junior. With that theory, he failed to take into account that she had her own money; sure, she did not have as much as Junior, but she had enough for her to live comfortably and for her “cousin” to lounge listlessly around her house.
“No, it’s not Junior,” she answered with a bit of an attitude.
Shego was insulted that anyone would think that she could even stand Junior. Junior was slightly less annoying than Drakken just because he at least knew how to have a good time, but she suspected that being around him for a long period of time would wear on her nerves just like the inventor did. She could imagine herself punching the mess out of Junior eventually, especially since he was an airhead.
“But, there is someone else. Is it my cousin Eddie?” he asked with a fright. He remembered all of the things that his cousin had said about Shego and then he thought about how he never saw her rebuff the mechanical engineer.
The pale woman shuddered at the thought of being with that mullet-wearing lunatic. She had enough of the Lipsky family, especially after meeting him. “That creepy mechanic? Yeah, right. I wouldn’t touch that bastard with latex gloves,” she remarked. She would not touch that maniac Ed with one of those space suits on.
“Then who?” he shouted.
“Keep your voice down,” she commanded.
“What, because of your lazy cousin? That brat needs to go out and find a job and stop acting like a parasite,” he huffed. “Did she put you up to this? I know she’s never liked me,” he stated.
“She doesn’t think one way or the other about you. Why the fuck would she think about you? You’re nobody to her, so don’t talk about her like that. This is my decision and my decision alone. I can’t marry you. I won’t marry you. It’s that simple. Here’s your fucking key back, not that you’re going to be living there anymore,” she commented and she flicked the key at him, nailing him right in the nose because she was getting irked by him.
Drakken made a noise as the key fell into his lap. He looked down at the key and then back at the emerald-eyed officer. “Is that what this is about? The fact that I’m moving and you would have to too?” he inquired.
“No, but that was another piece of work there. How in the hell do you take a job out of state without at least asking me?” she demanded to know.
“So, that is what this is about?” he asked in a bemused tone.
“No, this is about us being done and over with,” Shego declared. It actually felt good to say those words; it was nice to not have to deal with him anymore. “Goodbye, Drakken,” she dismissed him.
She found that breaking up with the scarred scientist was a lot like hitting him. There was no guilt, no regret, and absolutely no remorse. It was not messy in any way. She felt free and relieved, like she had been unchained from a wall.
“Goodbye,” she stated again.
“You can’t be serious!” he shouted, half angry, half whining.
“I’m very serious. Goodbye. Lots of luck to you in life, you’ll need it,” she replied and then she rose to her feet. She motioned to the door for him to get the hint to leave. If he did not get the hint soon, she was going to have to show him the door by throwing him through it.
“But, Shego, I—”
“What the hell don’t you understand about this? I don’t want to marry you. I don’t love you. We’re done. Goodbye,” she repeated because he was not getting the message. She doubted that she could be anymore straightforward than she had been already. Well, she could always literally throw him out, she considered. And she figured that she might actually do that if he did not leave in the next twenty seconds.
“Can’t we talk about this?” he pled.
“We just did. Buh-bye now.”
Drakken was not to sure what to say; he had never planned on having such a conversation. He never thought that she would dump him. He did not fully understand why she was dumping him; he thought that they had had a good relationship. He did know that he might want to get going before he invoked Shego’s wrath because she was inevitably going to lose her temper with him arguing with her.
The blue inventor wisely started toward the door and when he got to the entrance hall, he noticed Kim sitting against the wall by the living room entrance. She had one leg propped up and was resting one of her hands on that leg. He glared at her, but she did not even bother to look up at him.
Shego went to the door and held it open, waiting for the onyx-eyed scientist to get moving out of the apartment. He hesitated for a moment and looked like he was about to say something to the slender redhead. The emerald-eyed woman grabbed him to help him get out; he made a startled noise while being manhandled. She flung him out of the apartment and slammed the door shut once he was on the other side, looking as if he was about to protest.
Shego turned her attention to Kim once she was done with Drakken. The redhead remained parked against the mint green wall, staring down at the wooden floor of the hall. Her face betrayed nothing that might be going on in her mind.
“So, how much did you hear?” the pale woman inquired.
“You never answered him on the issue of if there was someone else,” the slim girl replied.
Shego smiled a bit. “He should’ve asked the question and ended it there instead of guessing. So, pancakes?”
“With cinnamon?” the younger woman asked, still looking at the floor and still not letting her emotions known.
“Well, then, I’ll take some. Like six,” Kim mused aloud.
“Six it is, you greedy monster,” Shego remarked and the impish redhead finally smiled.
Kim was resting against Shego; they were both on the sofa. The adventurer was curled up against the older woman; the hero was sitting on her lap, her head resting on Shego’s shoulder and her face was slightly nuzzled in Shego’s pale skin. Her hands were at Shego’s side and her legs were wrapped around the raven-haired female. It seemed that she was very worn out from the past week.
The green-skinned woman was holding the younger female around the waist to make sure that the snoozing adventurer did not fall off of her or off of the couch. She was also rubbing the girl’s back, keeping her relaxed and helping her stay asleep because she understood that the girl had been through quite a bit emotionally. She was watching some movie on television, but she was not paying it much mind. She was mostly thinking about everything that had just happened.
When it all came down to it and in retrospect, it had been a very easy decision, Shego realized. It just had to be Kim. She could not even believe how she had tried to consider that it could be any other way. There were so many reasons that it had to be her little monster and not Drakken; all Shego had to do was stop and realize that. Maybe she really was the one that was stupid, she considered.
She asked herself now, what did she think she was going to do without her brat and with Drakken? She was just going to go out of her mind if she had stayed with that nutty and irksome inventor. She knew that she wanted her pet more than anyone else in her life, so why had she fought it? It just had to be Kim.
She guessed that it was just difficult for her admit to herself that she needed someone like Kim. She did not know what was going on in the olive-eyed girl’s head most of the time and she did not understand why someone like Kim wanted to be with someone like her. It did not make any sense to her, even though it seemed to make perfect sense to the younger woman. She did not really like the fact that she did not know what was going on in the redhead’s mind.
There was also the chance that she just did not want to believe that Kim was serious about her feelings. She had trouble seeing any reasons for Kim to be sincere, even though in her heart, she knew that everything the girl did and said was honest. Sometimes, though, it seemed like it could all just be part of her acting as a pet and not how she truly felt. But then again, she did take into account that the girl was willing to be her pet, so that said a lot in and of itself.
She supposed that the reasons did not matter at the moment. The important thing was that she had made the right decision to keep Kim just like they both wanted her to do. They needed each other.
The pale woman leaned down and kissed the corner of Kim’s mouth. She still had Kim, but she could not help wondering what she was supposed to do now. Would they continue as they were? Should they continue as they were? Her thoughts were thrown off as Kim moved against her, grinding against her just a bit. Shego let out a small groan and the petite hero smiled in her sleep.
“You’re up,” Shego accused the redhead.
“Only a little,” Kim replied, not bothering to open her eyes. She was awake enough to know what she had done, but she was not awake enough to where she wanted to get up. She planned on staying right where she was for as long as possible.
“You’re such a little monster.”
“I’m your little monster and that’s what counts. You know, you never did say if there was someone else.”
“Maybe,” Shego replied. Maybe there was someone else, but if there was, what was she supposed to do? She did not know.
“Take your time,” Kim said.
Shego smiled a bit. Her runt understood her for whatever reason. Her little monster wanted to be with her and wanted to make her happy. She knew that the eccentric adventurer loved her and she realized that in someway, she loved the olive-eyed girl in return. She just had to figure out what to do with that information. At least she was aware that she could take her time.
She supposed that for most people, it would seem like an easy conclusion to come to now that she knew and admitted to herself that she loved Kim, but it was not so simple. She understood that she wanted and needed Kim around, but she considered that she might just want the redhead as a pet. Maybe things would be best if Kim remained a pet, she considered. She was not sure where they should go as companions.
“Just try not to take too long,” Kim added while leaning in for a kiss. She was just going to simply kiss the older woman on the cheek, but Shego turned her head.
The super-powered woman turned into the kiss, not away from it. Their lips connected into a tender, sweet embrace. There was a flare to the kiss that neither of them that felt in a long time, in exactly the amount of time since they had last kissed in such a manner. They both actually sighed in relief a second into the kiss; it had been far too long in between passionate kisses, they silently decided.
Kim had been hungering for that moment for so long that she could hardly believe that it was happening. She wished that the incredible embrace would never end now that it was finally taking place. Shego’s lips were so unexplainably delicious to her, like divine nectar, and she would not mind devouring them for the rest of her life. For right now, though, she would make sure the magic moment lasted for as long as it could.
Shego could not believe what she had been running from; she could not believe what she had been denying for so long. She had forgotten the petite hero’s mouth was so warm, inviting, and absolutely scrumptious. It was like she had been living off of crackers for the past couple of years and she was now being given a feast fit for a god. Of course, she, being who she was, wanted more.
The pale woman lapped at Kim’s lower lip and the slender hero eagerly opened her mouth to the silent command. Shego’s tongue invaded Kim’s mouth and brushed up against the redhead’s own velvety tongue. The kiss became infinitely more delightful at that moment; it now transcended any normal feeling and became cosmic as they deeply and thoroughly tasted each other.
Kim involuntarily purred into the older female’s mouth because of the intimate contact and how beautiful it felt; yes, the kiss actually felt beautiful, as if it was classical music. Shego’s touch was just all round lovely and completely pleasing and fulfilling. If she were to die at that moment, Kim was certain that she would go happily; the elder woman was of a similar mindset. But, since she was still alive and the moment was still going on, Kim decided to make the most of it.
The olive-eyed young lady ground her hips against Shego’s again, causing the raven-haired woman to moan lightly. The friction was too much. The emerald-eyed woman placed a hand on Kim’s hips to keep her from moving like that again, but she continued to passionately kiss the younger woman. The redhead was not deterred and made sure to keep her lips on Shego’s while trying something else.
The adventurer moved her hand from Shego’s side and placed it on the pale woman’s breast. She gently began massaging the soft mound, causing Shego to moan again, much louder than before. The raven-haired woman pulled away a little bit, breaking the kiss, much to Kim’s misery.
“Going too fast?” Kim asked.
“Yeah,” Shego confirmed.
“Sorry,” the redhead apologized. She hoped that was not going to be the end of things, not now that she was geared up. She needed contact and lots of it.
Shego did not say anything; she leaned in for another kiss. Kim did not object and met the older woman half way. They melted into each other, like calm clouds that where in each other’s paths. In the back of her mind, Kim did wonder if the kisses meant that the issue was dead and Shego knew just what she wanted from the redhead now. If not, Shego could still take her time because Kim no longer feared being cast aside. She had won; Shego understood how important she was to her, so all was right in her universe.
Well, that’s the end of that. Should I do one more just to watch where they go with their relationship? I’d really like to close it all up, so if you notice any loose ends that I need to address, please point them out so I can put them into this one last story; that is, if you all think I should do one last story. Also, if you want to see anything in particular happen, let me know. I’m really fishing for ideas here if I do one last story for this and I really wouldn’t mind the input from everyone reading because I want to do it big for everyone.
Things that I have planned (though nothing is definite yet since I don’t know if you want me to write it yet): Junior makes a comeback, Shego meets the Possible clan, Drakken makes a comeback, Josh makes a comeback and Kim and Shego struggle to be more normal in their relationship. Not really detailed, huh? Well, I don’t want to spoil anything if you guys want another story.
Also, in my spare time, I’m going to go back and clean up Walking the Line. So, if you want to see it without as many mess-ups (not saying none, just not as many), I won’t stop you. I may add a few paragraphs here or there, but nothing that changes the story. If you could leave a review on it somewhere if you read it again, I’d appreciate it.